Are We Ashes And Wine? [Lysander]

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RJ paced outside the Ravenclaw common room, his nervous, heavy footfalls the only sound that could be heard on the hard stone floor. Ever since the first day of school, when Professor Longbottom made that heinous announcement, RJ knew Lysander would try to go through with it. He wished he could put his own name in that blasted cup, just so Lysander would have a smaller chance of being chosen. But he wasn't old enough, and he didn't think his heart could handle being selected anyway.

How long had he been waiting for Lysander? Fifteen minutes? Thirty? An hour? He would pace all day and night in front of that door if he had to. He had to talk Lysander out of putting his name in the cup. He could be killed! The last time a Triwizard tournament had been held, someone had been killed. RJ had heard the stories many times. His father had helped create the horrific maze, and RJ's vivid imagination could only ponder at what horrific challenges would present themselves in the new tournament. And he knew Lysander was just as excited as he was terrified. So he would wait.

As he waited, several Ravenclaw students passed by, giving his peculiar looks. "Lysander?" he would ask the students, both coming and going, but the response was always the shake of a head or a hurried "No." And, of course, the longer he waited, the more his imagination ran away with him. The stories his father told him as a child all came rushing back, and his pacing became more feverish. He needed to talk to Lysander, to explain...what? That he didn't want the one person he actually cared about risking his life in a death-defying tournament? His mind went back to that day at Madame Puddifoots's, when the seer made her prediction. He hoped against hope that her prediction was a sign that Lysander wouldn't be chosen. Or that, perhaps, RJ could successfully talk him out of participating.

@lysander

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He had finally done it. After days of balking and rationalizing and otherwise finding reasons not to go through with putting his name in the Goblet, Lysander had done it. He had taken a long walk around the castle after going through with it to try to get the color of the Goblet’s flames out of his ears, which had only partially succeeded. Eventually his feet had tired and his mind had begun to calm, and Lysander had decided that it was time to return to the common room to prepare for the upcoming term. He had notes to organize, chapters to pre-read, and people to avoid talking to.

When he made his way back up to the common room entrance, though, Lysander found the only person that he wouldn’t mind having a conversation with waiting in front of the common room entrance, looking decidedly distressed. Lysander wondered what had happened to make RJ look so antsy, and figured the only way to do that was to go right up and ask him. “RJ!” The Ravenclaw boy called as he approached the common room entrance. “What’s got you all in a twist?” Hopefully it was something easy, something that Lysander could fix. He didn’t like seeing RJ unhappy.

@rj

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Just when RJ thought he was going to walk rivets into the ground and disintegrate under the weight of the many stares that passed by him, he finally heard the dulcet tones of Lysander's voice. He whipped around, relief washing over him. He had to stop himself from rushing over to the other male and wrapping him in a bear hug. As gentle as RJ was, he often forgot his own strength. He could easily break bones if he ever had the inclination, which he hoped would never happen.

"I'm glad you're here," he said breathlessly. He felt like he'd just run a mile, and he tried to choose his next words carefully. But there was no right way to express his fear. Forsaking any kind of tact, he blurted out, "I don't want you to put your name in the Goblet of Fire." Running a large hand through his hair, his fingers splayed out in the locks, tugging them gently, nervously. "It's not...I just...I don't want you to get hurt," he said helplessly, feeling like a begging dog.

@lysander

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Lysander hadn’t expected RJ to hug him. He still wasn’t used to being hugged, but he kind of liked it – especially when RJ was the hugger. The other boy was a half-giant, so his hugs were a little overwhelming, but overwhelming in a good way. Lysander smiled into RJ’s chest for a moment before being released from the embrace, still grinning hopelessly. When the Hufflepuff said that he was glad Lysander was there, the Ravenclaw felt like his cheeks were going to split open. “Well, I’m glad you’re here.” He responded. What RJ said next, though, shocked Sander. He took a moment, trying to process what his friend was saying. “RJ…” He said with a soft sigh. “I already put my name in the Goblet.” The half-giant had had to blurt out what he said, and Lysander was no different. There was no good way to tell someone that you had already done the one thing that they had ever asked you not to do. “I don’t think I’ll get picked anyways.” He said with a sigh. He mirrored RJ’s gesture, running his own hand through his hair. “Not worthy enough.”

@rj

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"I already put my name in the Goblet."

RJ felt his blood run cold, and a shiver raced up his spine. He was too late. He should have been waiting by the Goblet, ready to tackle Lysander the moment he tried to step over the age line. But he thought he would have more time and a better chance of stopping the other wizard if he camped out in front of the latter's common room. But now it was too late. He stood there, gaping, trying to find the words to say. He wanted to be angry that Sander hadn't consulted him, but, then again, he didn't have a claim to the Ravenclaw's actions. They weren't...dating or anything.

"Of course you're worthy. No one's more worthy than you," he said quickly, biting his tongue. He really needed to shut up. "I mean, I'm just worried about you. Something horrible could happen, and...and...and I don't know what I would do without you," he concluded lamely. There. In a vague way, his feelings were out on the table. He felt a whimper rising in his throat, but he quashed it down. He wouldn't let Lysander know how helpless he felt. All he could do now was hope that the Goblet denied him.

@lysander

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Sander’s mouth fell open when RJ said that there was no one worthier than the Ravenclaw. He didn’t know about that, but no one had made such an open proclamation of his worth to the world. Carefully, Lysander shut his mouth again, licking his lips nervously as he tried to fathom a comeback to make to what RJ said. There was no comeback, though, nothing that he could say that would change that what RJ said sounded a lot like…well, not something you would say to a friend. Lysander didn’t get butterflies in his stomach, but he did get a pang, almost like he was hungry, that sent a jolt through him. Sander stood up straighter, and that jolt was enough that the Ravenclaw’s mind began to work again.

“Something horrible could always happen to me.” Sander replied logically. It was true. There hadn’t needed to be a Triwizard Tournament for students to be kidnapped. “I…appreciate your concern, RJ. Your opinion matter a lot to me.” Oh, wow, the floor looked particularly interesting that day, didn’t it? All flagstones and…was that a bug? How wonderful! “I’ll try not to die if I get picked.” That was the best promise that Lysander could offer, given the circumstances.

@rj

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The thought of something bad happening to Lysander...RJ couldn't stand it. That was the whole reason he had come looking for the Ravenclaw. It was selfish of him to try to deny someone of such an honor, but Lysander could die. That was the whole reason the tournament was banned for so long. And RJ didn't know if he could live with that. Other than Adrian, Lysander was the closest friend RJ had, and sometimes he looked at the boy as more than just a friend. He could never say it out loud, even to himself, but he saw Lysander as much more than a friend. Which was why the uncertainty of the future was killing him. It was selfish, so selfish, but he hoped that Lysander wouldn't be picked. That some other poor saps could go risk their lives. But not Lysander. Not his Lysander.

RJ felt his large body trembling as the emotion welled up within him. He was going to cry, he knew it. And he was not about to let Lysander see that show of weakness. I - I have to go." Turning abruptly on his heel, RJ ran away, his heavy footfalls pounding on the floor. He had to get away. Away from the selfishness. Away from the hurt. Away from Lysander.