what if i told you? [anna]

[Deleted]

It had been exactly four days since Oscar had kissed Anna. Four days, and he still didn't know what to say to her. It seemed too...silly, he supposed, and juvenile, just to go up to her and blurt out what he was feeling. It seemed even sillier because he didn't know what he was feeling, and saying 'I have feelings for you but I don't know what they are' wasn't exactly the most romantic thing. And if there was one word that Oscar could put on the mixture of feelings he had towards Anna, it was romantic. That was the only thing that he knew for sure; he didn't like Anna as a friend anymore. When it had changed, he didn't know, and that was part of the reason he wasn't comfortable just telling Anna how he felt. What if he just loved her fame? It was frustrating, because the only way he could tell was by trying, and he didn't want to ruin his friendship with Anna. She was one of the two friends he had, and he'd rather not throw that away for romance. He could content himself with saying 'I love you' in a platonic way, if he really tried, as long Anna stayed in his life. Ozzy had taken to sitting at the Hufflepuff table in the Great Hall. They were by far the friendliest bunch, but not friendly in the rowdy way the Gryffindors tended to be whenever he sat at their table without Anna. No one at the Hufflepuff table bothered him as he picked his way through a stack of pancakes. Oscar tried to keep focused on his food, but he couldn't help but look up when he saw a flash of red hair.

@annelise

[Deleted]

Four days. Four long, excruciating days and still not a word, not a glance. What was going on? It felt like he was trying to avoid her and Anna didn't know how to take it. She didn't know if she was overreacting or not. What she did know was that for the first time in weeks, she hadn't even seen Oscar in four days. He had to be avoiding her. 

Part of her was sad about this. She missed his companionship, missed teasing him and having someone who wasn't treating her differently because she was a champion. The other part of her was angry. It wasn't her fault that they kissed! All she was doing was minding her business, waltzing when he kissed her. If he was upset about that, then he shouldn't have done it. Ignoring the fact that those few moments when his lips were pressed to hers were the most thrilling moments of her life, Anna would prefer to have him as a friend than as nothing, which is where it felt like they were now.

She walked into the Great Hall, her eyes automatically sweeping the room for him. It was habit now. Anna had always been good at spotting people in a crowd, not that it helped her much the last few days. She hadn't even caught a glimpse of him. Sighing, she moved to sit at her usual spot on the Gryffindor table, facing the rest of the room so she could continue her fruitless search for Oscar. She grabbed a banana and started peeling it as she looked around the room.

Then she finally saw him. Her eyes stopped searching and focused directly on Oscar as their eyes connected and she couldn't pull her gaze away. She didn't want to. This was the first time she'd seen him in days. Her eyes drank in the sight of him and a small smile covered her face, despite the fact that he was far enough away that they couldn't talk. At least she knew he didn't run away and go back to Beauxbatons.

@oscar

[Deleted]

The red hair was Anna’s. Of course. It was always Anna’s. It was like his brain had seen her hair, and had saved that color someplace separate form every other color. Oscar would know that hue until he died, it felt like. Anna’s hair was, of course, connected to Anna, and before he knew what was happening, Oscar was looking Anna in the eyes. He had expected her to look away, embarrassed by the fact that he had kissed her despite the fact that she had no romantic feelings for him, but she didn’t. Hope fluttered in Oscar’s chest, and he suddenly understood the poem his mother had once read to him. Hope was a thing with feathers – it was a bird inside of him desperate to break free and sing Anna a love song for the ages. She was so far away, though, and Oscar was worried that by the time he got up and walked over, the bird in the prison of his ribcage would have died, and he would be left with the same empty feeling he had had before she had entered the room. Anna smiled at him, and Oscar couldn’t help but smile back. There was never anything for him to do when she smiled at him except for smile back. He simply wasn’t physically capable of doing anything else. Oscar took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. If she kept smiling…Maybe if she kept smiling, that meant that things were okay? If she kept smiling, he could go talk to her, and then…something. That was all that Ozzy needed: for Anna to keep smiling.

@annelise

[Deleted]

He was looking back at her. Anna was surprised by the fact that he was smiling at her. She thought that after avoiding her for so long he would just look away. Maybe she was overreacting and he wasn't avoiding her. But then, why was he sitting at the Hufflepuff table and why hadn't he come to sit by her during the last few days? He didn't always sit with her, but lately the two seemed to spend more of their meals together than apart ... until four days ago. Still, he was smiling at her and she didn't want to look away. She was trying to read his mind just by looking at him. No, not really read his mind, but she was trying to figure out what was going on in his head. Why was he so confusing? She kept smiling, hoping that maybe he would come talk to her, tell her where he'd been the last few days. He said he wouldn't disappear, but he had and she was worried by that fact. What if he decided he didn't want to stay at Hogwarts and opted to go home to France? Was that even an option? Until she saw him sitting in the Great Hall, that was the worry that plagued her waking thoughts. But he wasn't gone. He was here, smiling at her almost like he had before everything went wrong in the Room of Requirement and all Anna wanted was to stay in eye contact with him. 

@oscar

[Deleted]

Anna was still smiling. Maybe the tide of Oscar’s luck had finally turned, because Anna was still smiling at him, the girl he loved was still smiling at him, and…and it felt wonderful. He had to go talk to her. The bird inside his chest wasn’t just fluttering anymore – it was beating his chest with its wings, screaming at her with its high-pitched voice, telling him he needed to go to her. Oscar laid his utensils neatly on his plate, and watched as the extra food vanished, taking back down to the kitchens. He took a deep breath, and then stood up, intending to make his way over to the Gryffindor table. Before he could begin walking, though, one of the students from his school rushed up, appearing to be in a panic. “Caden est mort.” Just like that, the bird died inside of him. Luck had not turned, life had not made itself suddenly easy for him, and everything was going wrong. Caden…was dead? Oscar almost couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe that something like that would happen to his best friend, and so young, too. He didn’t bother to ask for details. He was needed back in France – Caden’s parents needed him. As much as he loved Anna…Oscar loved Caden more. Even if it wasn’t true, even if something had gotten lost in translation, Oscar needed to see for himself. He turned away from the Gryffindor table, and walked away.

@annelise

[Deleted]

All Anna wanted to do right now was go over and talk to him, but she didn't know what to do. He wasn't really acting like he'd been avoiding her the last few days, but did that mean he wanted to talk to her now or not? Maybe he was just smiling because he could. A smile didn't necessarily mean anything, did it? 

Then he stood up. Oscar was still staring at her and he stood up. Anna was convinced he was coming to talk to her and her smile widened at the thought. Were they finally going to get past this awkwardness? A different student from his school approached him and Oscar spun around and walked right out of the room, without a second glance at her. Anna felt the excitement die within her. He was gone. Granted, he probably just went to the carriage, but he left. She was so certain he was going to talk to her and now ... now she was angry. She was done with this! Why should she sit at the Gryffindor table and mourn the fact that her ... friend wasn't talking to her? She was Annelise Weasley! She could do hard things, even seek him out and she was done with this waiting. She ate her food with renewed vigor, determined to find him once this was done and make him talk to her. She wanted her friend back, even if that meant she had to give up all hopes of something more happening with him.

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@oscar