we should all burn together [james]

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Fred wasn't sure he was ready for this. Visiting the graveyard where Abby was buried was something he had been intending on doing for a long time. Going to see her tombstone felt like admitting that she was gone, though, and Fred wasn't ready for that yet. He had eventually decided that he could go, as long as he wasn't alone, and since it was the three month anniversary of her death, Fred had wanted to visit Abby. Three months had gone by impossibly quickly, but Fred tried not to think about that. He instead thought about James. His cousin was supposed to meet him outside he graveyard he was currently at the gates for, so they could go to the gravesite together. Fred felt a pang - he knew that James had been closer to Abby than he had been, so the visit was bound to be harder for his cousin. Fred shifted nervously, looking down at the jar that he held in his hand contemplatively. He had looked up a spell for everlasting fire, and put a ball of it in a jar so that there would always be light and warmth by Abby's side, but now that he looked at it, the jar seemed rather stupid and cliché. He'd ask James about it, Fred decided. All that there was left to do was wait for his cousin to show up.

@jams

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It had taken James quite some time for him to decide he was finally ready to visit Abby. It had taken a lot of soul searching for him to know that he could finally handle it; seeing her grave and feeling all the emotions he knew that would come with that. Natalia had helped him a lot, just by being by his side. He felt awful, in a way, that he had been so out of touch with everyone since Abby's death. He hadn't really spoken to Fred except for when his cousin invited him to visit Abby and that was when he knew it was time.

The Gryffindor stood at the end of the road, looking at the entrance to the graveyard. There stood his cousin, waiting for him. If Fred had not been there, James probably would have just straight up turned around and left. He knew he couldn't face this alone, but with Fred he knew he could. Slowly, James walked up to the gates of the cemetary, taking in deep breaths every few steps. Finally, when he reached Fred he stopped for a moment to meet his cousin's eyes before closing the gap between them and wrapping his arms around him in a hug.

@fred

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Fred saw James out of the corner of his eyes, and turned to face his cousin, raising his hand in a greeting. He was surprised when James wrapped his arms around Fred. Was hugging a thing that they did now? Fred couldn’t remember the last time he had ever hugged anyone, let alone his cousin. Fred had to adjust his grip on the jar with the fire in it, trying not to drop it – he couldn’t seem to find a way that didn’t make the whole thing rather precarious, but maybe that was because Fred wasn’t used to hugs even without a jar of fire in his hands. He withdrew from James, clamping his mouth stuff so a bunch of words about hugging and what their relationship was and all those other things that were inconsequential when Fred remember that they were here because their friend had been buried. Instead, Fred offered the jar of eternal fire to James. “I, uh, wanted to put this on Abby’s grave. But I thought maybe it was…weird or something.” Fred shrugged his shoulders, and then realized he hadn’t explicitly asked a question. Oh well – hopefully James would give his opinion anyways.

@jams

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James was so happy to hug someone else, finally. Since Abby's death, he had mainly been comforted by Natalia and his mother once or twice. But the whole time he had longed for the presence of Fred, or Alice... and Abby. Though he knew he could never really feel Abby's presence again, he wished deeply that he could. It was only a little weird to James to hug Fred. The boys had grown up as close friends, practically brothers, and James hardly ever even hugged his own brother. But the hug he gave Fred now felt so comforting to the Gryffindor.

When the two broke apart, James let out a heavy sigh and then looked at what Fred was handing him. A jar with a flame inside. James took the jar with both hands and held it to examine it. He was silent for a long time as he stared at the flame inside the jar. For some reason, it felt so fitting that Fred has chosen to do this. Abby was, her whole life, like a dancing flame. She was fire and the rest of the world had been ice. And now without her, the world would forever be a little bit colder. "It's perfect," James said softly as he held the jar close to his chest and finally met Fred's eyes.

@fred

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Fred watched cautiously as James examined the flame jar that he had created, searching for some sort of reaction as James just… stared. It was weird, how quiet his cousin was being. Normally when they were together things were loud and there was a lot of laughter. Being in the silence together was kind of uncomfortable, just like the hug had been – not because there was anything wrong with it, but because it was just so unfamiliar. “I… guess we should go see her now.” Fred said, gesturing to the entrance to the cemetery. He ignored the burning that had suddenly appeared in his eyes when he said the words. It was still so weird that the only time they could see Abby was when they were in a graveyard, and even then, they couldn’t see her. Just her tombstone. Fred offered his hand to his cousin – another weird thing that he normally wouldn’t do, but felt right under the circumstances. They were going to do this together – that was the only way they could both survive it.

@jams

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James wished that they were in a graveyard under any other circumstances. It was heartbreaking to James to even think about the reason by the visit. So far he was doing pretty well in keeping himself together but he had a feeling that seeing her tombstone was going to take a whole other piece out of him that he wasn't ready for. "I guess so," he agreed, his voice sounding way more confident than he felt. He took a step forward and when he saw Fred's hand, he didn't even hesitate in grabbing it. Sure, he had never been so affectionate toward his cousin but he didn't feel weird doing it now. If anything, he felt grounded by Fred even if Fred was hurting just as much as he was. James stayed uncharacteristically quiet as the two of them strolled through the cemetary and the further along they got, the heavier his breathing became until he stopped suddenly in the middle of the cemetary and stared blankly ahead. "Fred," he said, his voice breaking. "I... I don't think I can do this."

@fred

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James agreed fairly readily to begin walking through the cemetery, and Fred squeezed his cousin’s hand when they laced their fingers together. This was kind of weird, but Fred didn’t think that learning to be more physically affectionate would be a bad thing for him or James. Learning to tell people that they cared about them would be difficult for both of the Gryffindor boys, but Fred was hopeful that if nothing else good came out of Abby’s death, then at least the two Weasley boys would be able to trust each other even more than they did before. As they walked through the cemetery, Fred could hear his cousin’s breathing getting slowly louder, but didn’t think anything of it… until James stopped, and said that he couldn’t do it. Fred didn’t know what to do in this situation. He really thought that it would be better for his cousin to get to see their friend’s gravestone and find some sort of closure in her death, but he also didn’t want to press James into doing something that he wasn’t ready for. Fred took a shaky breath. “Not going to see her doesn’t mean that she’s not dead, James.” He said quietly. “If you don’t want to go, that’s fine… but I’m going to see Abby.” Fred announced, mouth set in a thin line.

@jams