Haunt [Adonia]

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

Everything had happened at once. One second, the Triwizard Tournament was coming to a close, the Durmstrang and Beauxbatons students were preparing to leave, and Hogwarts was about to enter into its final two weeks of tests. The end result was graduation, and from there, adulthood and everything that came with it. Cara had expected it to finish out just like the last six years of school had; a huge celebration, awards for winning the tournament, other nonsense about being smart with magic over the break for returning students, and then a congratulations for the graduates. Instead they received two explosive responses two weeks early. Trying to process all of it at the same time was impossible. There was a part of her that tried to tell her it was awful, and another part that was thankful that it wasn’t Hogwarts students that were killed or injured. Mostly killed though. She knew that she wouldn’t have been able to function for the next eternity had any of her sisters been on the boat or carriage that were destroyed. But she was still happy, in all her selfishness, that someone else had felt the pain and suffering that Hogwarts had gone through the year before. That Ravenclaw had gone through. It was wrong but she couldn’t rationalize it any other way.

They were immediately graduated and ushered home, and that should have been it. The Daily Prophet had produced the names of the victims of both schools. It was morbid, but they were there to be remembered and memorialized for the rest of time. Flipping through the pages and faces of the foreign students that she had probably seen dozens of times was tough, but necessary to move on, at least in her mind. When she finished going through Durmstrang, Cara realized that there was one name that hadn’t been in there. Adonia. In the panic and confusion, she had forgotten about the girl, despite having felt like there was a connection made with her. Family came first after all, and the Durmstrang girl couldn’t blame her for that. So the former Ravenclaw decided she owed Adonia a visit.

It wouldn’t be much – Mungo’s was swamped now with those that had survived (which was few), but they had all hands on deck in case something else happened. Cara figured she could pop in for ten minutes or so, not wanting to intrude on family members that were probably trying to get a glimpse of their loved one. She had a box of macaroons in one hand, and flowers in the other. Standing outside of Adonia’s door was the hardest part of the whole trip. The idea and execution had been easy for Cara, but when it came to turning the doorknob, things got tricky. She wasn’t sure what she was going to say, or even what she was supposed to say in the first place. Was she supposed to say she was sorry for what happened, or was that too insensitive? She didn’t even know what condition Adonia was even in, though considering the ward the room was in, it wasn’t super critical. Taking a deep breath, Cara raised the hand that was holding the box of macaroons and rapped her knuckles on the door as loudly as possible.

[Deleted]

Adonia was about halfway through he healing process they told her. She could move her right shoulder a little, but nothing more than that on her right side. Her right leg was a complete disaster and she was afraid she wouldn't walk on it again, even thought they kept telling her that she would. She was wide awake, even though Brandon was unconscious in the bed next to her. He was on heavier stuff than she was, what with his spine condition and all. She heard a knock on the door and reached over to press the button by her bed that would open it.

When the door swung open she saw a familiar, beautiful blonde. She was actually surprised at the rock that stopped in her throat at the thought of Cara. Things were so much more simpler back when they had gone on their date. Cara had been so charming and lovely, and Adonia had promised to help her with some character work in her stories. Adonia smiled, "come for literary advice already? I'm afraid my brain is a bit muddled, but I'll do my best," she said with a light-hearted tone. There was no room for sadness here now.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

The door snapped open immediately. Cara stepped back as it did so, wavering slightly behind the door frame. It was like the person controlling it had been waiting for her or something. That was obviously impossible unless they were a Legilimens. As far as she knew from her date with Adonia, the Durmstrang girl wasn’t one of those, though it would have explained her propensity to know where everything was going. That or she was just a wonderful conversationalist. Cara could see either of those being possible, considering how many questions the former Ravenclaw had been left with following their initial meeting.

Adonia was in the bed directly in front of the entrance to the room. There were a few other beds there as well, one that looked like it was occupied by another person, the rest empty. Craning her neck, Cara attempted to get a glimpse of the other person to have a better idea of who they might be. Was it a random patient, or another Durmstrang student that had survived? From the way the newspaper had put it, the northern school had suffered far fewer casualties than Beauxbatons had. “Yes…I mean, no. Not today,” Cara corrected herself as she turned her attention back to Adonia, who she hadn’t realized was awake when the door initially opened. Trying to work right now would be impossible. She hadn’t even had a decent idea since school ended. It was too difficult to create things when everything else was being destroyed. “I wanted to see how you were doing,” she replied, not moving from her spot outside of them room. “Considering everything…”

[Deleted]

Cara stood in the doorway, seemingly unsure about entering the room. Cara clarified that today she wouldn't be needing advice at the moment. Then, Cara added that she wanted to see how Adonia was doing. Adonia grinned at that, "well, it'd be easier to talk if you came in here, brown eyes," she said, her tone as sweet and smooth as ever. A hit to her leg and arm wasn't enough to stop Adonia from being herself. Even if it did hurt like hell. The bed was upright at the moment so she could sit up without using too much muscle, which was nice. She leaned forward a little still, holding her good arm (the left one) out toward Cara, her hand outstretched, "are you afraid you'll catch a broken arm and leg too? I promise I'm not contagious. If anything I'm more subdued than ever," she joked, even though it was a little true. She was physically limited, which was actually her worst nightmare. If she was in Brandons situation it would be her actual hell.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

Cara didn’t know that it was possible to be self-conscious about her own eyes. Hell, she forgot what colour they were half the time, only being reminded if it was brought up in casual conversation or if she was staring at herself in the mirror. And while neither of those happened often, the fact that she was now trying to decipher what Adonia meant by calling her ‘brown eyes’ was. How on earth had she remembered what her eyes looked like for that long, especially with everything else in between? From where the former Ravenclaw was standing in the doorway, it had to be impossible to see the actual colour, because she couldn’t see what Adonia’s were. That was impressive, to say the least. But it also had to mean something else, and that alone wasn’t enough to get Cara to move her legs forward and into the room.

The other girl beckoned her to enter, joking that she wasn’t contagious. Cara cracked a weak smile at it. At least she was trying to make light of the situation. Not everyone could do that. Swallowing, she finally stepped in the room, giving another glance at the other occupied bed. The person in it still hadn’t moved, so she assumed they were either asleep or knocked out medically. If it was another Durmstrang student, that wouldn’t be all that surprising. Crossing over towards the bed, Cara placed the box of macaroons on the nightstand, and the flowers into the vase before taking a seat in the chair on the other side of it. “How are you feeling?” she asked rather awkwardly, unsure of where to go next with their conversation.

[Deleted]

Cara smiled a little which was a good sign. She stepped in, finally, and moved to set a box on the nightstand and the flowers in the vase, then sat down. Adonia watched her in silence the whole while, waiting for her to get comfortable. At Caras awkward sounding question, she laughed. "Terrible, actually. But it's nice to have company," she answered with complete honesty. She leaned forward a little and held a hand out toward Cara, her left hand of course, and rested it on the bed beside where Cara was sitting, face up. "What's in the box," she asked, her voice soft but she didn't look toward it.

She really was trying to take stock in the fact that someone had actually come to visit her who was just there for her. Some had come for her and Brandon, schoolmates and whatnot. A lot had come just for Brandon. That lovely Ophelia came for her and Brandon, Adonia was just lucky enough to be awake. But no one had come for her.

She didn't realize her eyes were starting to moisten while she was having these thoughts. It was just a reminder that so many of her friends had died, and that maybe she didn't have that many friends after all. But this person, one person, came to see her. Even brought her flowers. Her own father hadn't even done that. Her own father just sent a short letter, and paid the bills.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

Cara couldn’t understand how Adonia did it. Here she was, explaining that she wasn’t doing all that well (and the former Ravenclaw assumed no one would be one-hundred percent after something like that), but she was also laughing. The ability to make light of such a horrible situation was almost unbelievable – Cara had a feeling that she probably would have shut herself away in a room and tried and avoid all of it as much as possible. Her level of empathy for anyone aside from a few friends and family was almost nonexistent, mostly because everyone seemed to annoy her. Adonia fell into the category of friends and family at this point, otherwise Cara would not have visited. Typically she figured someone else more important would come along and make their day, so it wasn’t really her responsibility to do so. Adonia said that it was nice to have company though, and that was enough for her to understand that there hadn’t been that many visitors so far. Most of the Durmstrang girl’s friends were probably dead after all.

She simultaneously took Adonia’s extended hand and reached for the box of macarons with her free hand. “I remembered you saying that you liked macarons, so I figured I’d bring some along…” Setting the box down on the bed, she popped the top of it open to show the contents. She had planned on bringing them from the beginning, but had never actually been to a store that sold them before. Luckily there had been a rather fancy place on her way over to the hospital. The bill didn’t matter as long as Adonia was happy. Cara continued to stare at the pastries, her eyes glazing over all the different colors. There was something really twisted about bringing brightly colored flowers and sweets to someone who just survived being blown up. Looking up from the box and back to Adonia, Cara could see that something was wrong, but didn’t know how to address it. Instead, she gave the girl’s hand a gentle squeeze to show that she was there.

[Deleted]

Adonia caught her breath a little as Cara took her hand, and her eyes followed Cara grabbing the box. Adonia looked down as Cara said what was in it and Adonias eyes definitely teared up there. She tightened her hold on Caras hand and looked up at her. Cara looked up too, and their eyes met. Adonia bit down on her bottom lip, feeling it quiver. She hadn't cried in front of anyone very much in her life, and she didn't want to start now. 

She didn't do anything for several long moments. She wanted to hug Cara, pulling her close onto the bed with her and just have someone to hold on to. She wanted to eat that whole box of macarons with her, maybe move a crumb at the corner of Caras mouth with her finger. She wanted to scream about how horrible this was. About how everyone was dead and she was broken and she couldn't walk. She wanted to run away with Cara right now. But, sadly, most of all she wanted to cry.

She finally blinked and looked back down at the macarons, "I love macarons. And flowers. And the colors," her voice cracked out that last word and she closed her eyes, shaking her head. "I don't want to cry," she admitted, then looked back up at Cara, "please don't let me." She realized that was a lot to ask of her.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

It seemed like silence had been the proper response. Cara watched as Adonia looked like she was trying to hold back everything. That alone was painful. She had no idea how many other people had visited since the accident, and whether they had been met with the same response or not, but it certainly looked like the girl needed to let it all out. Cara had been witness to her sister Persephone giving her this same look for years – obviously this was different from the petty things that Seph tended to lose it over. Calming down someone that was crying was basically a cake walk, although this time she was left at a loss. This time there were real emotions, real problems, and not that Seph hadn’t dealt with either of those during her sobbing spells, Adonia was fighting against something that she shouldn’t be. Cara remained silent as she watched the girl look back down at the macrons and talk about them, her voice cracking at the end of it. That was enough to get a lump to form in Cara’s throat. No one deserved to be put through any of that, and here Adonia was (as well as the person asleep in the bed next to her), both of them having to deal with something that was out of any normal person’s league.

Cara’s body was moving as Adonia finished stating that she didn’t want to cry. There was a little space on the bed next to the other girl, and she quickly placed the box of macarons back on the nightstand to make room for herself. She knew she had to be careful with the injuries that Adonia had to sustain, but emotional pain was so much more harmful than physical pain was at times. Placing her other hand one the other side of Adonia’s, Cara looked her in the eyes again. “You’re allowed to. There’s nothing wrong with crying. Especially around me,” she said softly. The last thing she wanted to do was prevent Adonia from letting it all out. Nothing good ever came from that.

[Deleted]

Cara moved the macarons and for a horrible second Adonia envisioned her getting up and leaving. Her eyes widened briefly with panic before realizing Cara was moving onto the bed where the box had been. She bit her lip, a few silent tears falling down her cheeks now. Cara took Adonias hand with her other hand as well now and Adonia looked down at them, then back up into Caras eyes. “You’re allowed to. There’s nothing wrong with crying. Especially around me,” Cara said, her voice soft. Adonia wanted to reach over with her other hand but she couldn't move it.

That's what made a sob catch in her throat as she looked at Cara. Then she started to cry, closing her eyes and leaning forward so her forehead was resting on Caras shoulder. She leaned her body back toward the pillow, hoping Cara would follow through with her so they could both lean back on the upright bed. She wanted to curl up toward Cara, but she could only move one side of her body. She hated how open her chest was to the ceiling rather than being able to hide it against Cara. She squeezed Caras hand harder than she meant to and just cried. The sounds she made were horrible, unattractive sounds that she didn't like anyone hearing from her.

But there was really no point in being vain right now. Eventually she slowed her crying and just laid there silently, her head nuzzled into Cara's shoulder. "Can I... hand me one of those macarons?" she asked softly.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

Everything that followed Cara telling Adonia that she was allowed to cry was almost instantaneous. The Ravenclaw knew that the other girl was already on the verge of it; all she needed was the nudge to send her over. It was healthier to let it out, instead of letting it eat her up inside. Cara had spent years allowing every little thing to pile up inside of her, only feeling the need to let it escape when she was barking at younger students or Kinsey. She couldn’t allow Adonia to go through the same thing, especially not with something as awful as this.

The sobs flooded out as Adonia set her head down on Cara’s shoulder. She pulled the uninjured arm closer to her chest in order to comfort her as much as possible. There wasn’t much she could do in terms of holding her in her arms – Adonia’s injuries seemed to be mostly on the right side of her body. Letting her body be pulled down towards the pillow, Cara snuck her right hand free from the hold it had on Adonia’s hand, and she managed to slip it around beyond her, holding her head firmly against her shoulder. That was all she could currently do, the horrible noises escaping from Adonia only reinforcing how hurt she actually was. There was no telling how long she had held all of this in, because it certainly seemed like it had been bottled up.

Cara continued to hold onto her tightly until the crying began to subside. She didn’t mean to be ‘petting’ Adonia’s head, but she felt like the motion of it had helped her calm down slightly. The other girl asked if she could have one of the macarons, and Cara smiled weakly before reaching over to pull a yellow one from the box. “Not partial to any colors are you?” she said as she handed it to Adonia.

[Deleted]

She was glad that Cara was there beside her and willing to hold onto her. Caras hand on her hair felt nice. She wished she could just stay there every day until Adonia was able to leave. She looked up a little when Cara reached for the macaron and chuckled at the question, shaking her head. "I like all the colors," she said, holding her free hand out for the yellow one that Cara had grabbed. She didn't want to stop holding hands, but she only had one hand that was working so she really had no choice.

She leaned back a little again once she had the macaron in her hand and took a bite. She smiled into it, finishing it in three bites since they were rather small. She wiped the sides of her mouth with the back of her pointer finger and then looked at Caras face, which wasn't that far away from hers. "Tell me how you've been. Have you been writing?" it would be nice to know the world was still spinning out there.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

She let out a soft laugh as Adonia said that she liked all of the colors. Of course she did. There were a lot of simple things like that, that always surprised the Ravenclaw. She spent so much time in school badgering and criticizing people over the smallest things that she never actually got to know too many people. Her siblings were one thing (and even then she barely understood a few of them), but other than them, there was only Dominic. Until Adonia, that was. Every time the other girl said something, Cara learned something new. That was why she had decided to come to the hospital to visit. Not only was it a nice gesture, and she was sure that Adonia would appreciate it, but she found that she wanted to know more about her. That and they had arraigned to look at the notes for the novel together. Cara couldn’t go back on plans like that.

Dropping the yellow macaron into Adonia’s free hand, she watched the girl quickly eat it. Luckily there was an entire box left, because it looked like a few wouldn’t be enough. “I’ve been…fine. Tried writing a bit when I got home, but it’s hard to wrap your head around things after everything that has happened.” She knew that letting it bother would only prevent any future creative drives, but none of it sat right with her. Being witness to the events of her sixth year and now this? The past two years had been nothing but death and destruction, and she was only just now starting to care about it. That was messed up. “We have a family vacation coming up soon, so I think I’m going to take that time to put school in the past and focus on writing full time.” That sounded like a good idea in her head, but she wasn’t sure how feasible it was. Only time would tell.

[Deleted]

Cara spoke, saying how she had been fine and tried writing, but it was hard after everything. Adonias brow furrowed but she laid her head back again and leaned against Caras shoulder. She said she had a family vacation coming up soon and Adonia gasped a little, just an excited sound. "Vacations are great for that sort of thing. I would like to take one but.. I'll have to wait until I've healed up a bit," she said, nodding slightly toward the right side of her body where all the trouble was. "I'd hate for the horrors of the real world to stop you from writing, Cara. Nothing should hinder creativity. Nothing," she spoke firmly, confidently. She was sure about this above all else, really. She was never going to stop acting, even if the next explosion she was in (wouldn't that be unlucky) lost her more than just limited use in her arm and leg. She would never give up. What was the point in having a dream if you were just going to let it die when things got scary? In a way that was probably how Elaine Dupree felt about this. Her dream was a dark one, sure, but she wasn't giving up. Adonia had to respect that, even if it ended in a lot of deaths. She didn't support the girl, but she got it.

cara june bainbridge

[cara june bainbridge]

@adonia

Adonia settled her head back onto her shoulder, and Cara leaned her own against it. Somehow this position was comfortable, despite her companion being unable to move the other side of her body. Adonia hadn’t complained about it yet, so the Ravenclaw was content with staying how they were. Although Adonia couldn’t see her face, Cara smiled at the sound she emitted about taking a vacation. That probably had something to do with being stuck in the hospital. At times, Cara wished she could lock herself up at home and never leave. It would drive her crazy, sure, but it would also shield her from everything else out there. The other girl said as much, stating that she shouldn’t be hindering her creativity. That was a valid point. “I know that. It’s just…” she paused to sigh. “I’ll be fine. It hasn’t stopped me before. The vacation will help get me over it.” She was pretty sure they were going to a beach, or at least somewhere that had sun. Getting away from the doom and gloom would be beneficial to everything. As much as she enjoyed being next to Adonia, the hospital didn’t help currently. The mechanical, sanitized feeling it gave off was far from what she needed in a productive environment.

“Where would you go if you could?” Cara found herself asking. It was too hard to ask directly where Adonia would want to go with her after getting out of the hospital, so doing it in a roundabout way would suffice. Personally, she would opt for somewhere quiet, but also a place that had things to do. Having a balance of going out and exploring a city and being able to crash for hours on end in a place that didn’t seem like a resort or hotel was her dream. That was also expensive, and she didn’t exactly have the pleasure of being able to spend money she didn’t have yet.