goodbye my almost lover [ondina]

[Deleted]

Elias was dead, and Fred... wasn't sure how to feel. He didn't know how to qualify his relationship with the Durmstrang Champion, because they had been friends verging on being not-friends, but then they'd lost touch with each other and drifted apart and then they were not-friends in a totally different way. And because he didn't know what he was to Elias, Fred wasn't sure how to grieve. That was made even more complicated that Fred didn't know anything about Elias's funeral. He knew the other boy was a Greyback, but that didn't really give Fred much to go off of when it came to asking about the funeral. The only person Fred knew for sure knew Elias was his cousin, but she had been listed among those who were presumed to be dead, which meant that Fred was left with no connection to Elias. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, the two of them hadn't even known each other, and that hurt more than it probably should have.

Since Fred didn't know what to do about Elias, he was returning to the one place he did know what to do - Abby's graveside. Maybe it was a little macabre to visit a graveyard to try to straighten out his thoughts, but Fred had always been a little too obsessed with death to be healthy. He had always thought that he was the one who was destined to die young, but now it seemed that he was meeting a worse fate - the people he loved were dying instead. Fred sat next to Abby's headstone, staring at the jar of fire that he had charmed to continue burning as if it could somehow tell him what he was supposed to do next.

[Ondina Nell Weasley]

i dare you.

ONDINA HADN'T INTENTIONALLY INTENDED TO FOLLOW HER COUSIN, it had just.. happened. Maybe she suspected a host more nefarious things when she'd seen him skulking toward the cemetery. Or, maybe she was just bored and nosy. Either way, Ondina had followed, but Fred was quicker, quicker than Ondina could every hope to be. She had lost him among the headstones and macabre angel statues mere seconds in to entering the land behind him.

However, she hadn't been quite ready to give up, even then. Ondina had wandered, a long black overcoat on as a wind had struck the city with a bitter abundance. She didn't mind it while wrapped up. It beat sweating three layers of make up off in the sun.

So, when Ondina did eventually find Fred again, she found herself minutely surprised. He sat at the foot of a large tombstone, a jar of fire at his feet. Who did he see fit to visit?

Ondina walked forward, hands slippery in her gloves. But, rather than keep her distance somewhat, curiosity drove her forward until she was just a few feet at his back, peering at the inscription with a bright red pout, as if she were invited.

"Abigail Shacklebolt..." Ondina breathed, her tone a shade breathless, as if often was. "You came all this way to see... Abigail... Shacklebolt..." Ondina's tone was dull, coloured only by a slight confusion and... disappointment. She had expected more. Something exciting at least. "Wow, Freddie. And they say you're the wild one!"

@fred

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Fred hadn’t noticed that he had been followed into the cemetery, but to say that he had been preoccupied would have been an understatement, so he didn’t berate himself too much for letting Ondina trail her as far as she had without his knowledge. His cousin was wrapped up in a big black overcoat that made her look like death herself – Ondina had always been a little bit gaunt, thanks to her various illnesses, and the overcoat just completed the picture. Fred stared up at her, not really sure what to say when she commented that he had come all this way to visit Abby. Everyone knew that she had been one of his best friends, so Fred didn’t understand why there was so much confusion in Ondina’s voice; visiting a friend’s grave was a common thing, after all. “Sorry to disappoint, Ondina.” Fred said with a shrug. “I’ve got a lot to think about.” Now was not the time to regale his cousin with the whole sordid tale of his and Elias’s maybe-romance, especially because he was pretty sure his cousin didn’t know that he was gay. Very few people knew at all, and he couldn’t imagine any of them telling Ondina about it – not when she had a less-than-stellar reputation. “You staying?” Fred asked, wondering if his cousin would depart now that she had stalked him and found that he wasn’t doing anything important.

Ondina Nell Weasley

[Ondina Nell Weasley]

i dare you.

ONDINA WRINKLED HER NOSE. She was disappointed. What had been the point of trailing her half alive body through a stinking cemetery to find him mourning. Like a common muggle. Rolling her eyes, Ondina stuffed her gloved hands deep in to her pockets. "Whatever..." She mumbled instinctively, already feeling the underlying chill of the day. Served her right, really. She shouldn't expect very much from her family at all.

But he did look troubled, and a look like that came with a story. Then again every one knew Fred and Abigail had been close. In a completely uninteresting manner. Or... maybe not. "What, were you fucking or something?" Ondina asked with a careless snort, rolling her eyes.

"Look, it's not like she's here and I'm interrupting something." Ondina had never seen the point of gravestones. "It's just a piece of stone with her name on it." Shrugging one shoulder, Ondina kicked a lump of grass with the toe of her boot. "Didn't know you were so sentimental, Freddie."

The truth was, Ondina hasn't walked away yet because she wasn't sure she'd make it back to the exit without her chest turning on her. She needed a minute to reload, breathing deep and steady. Filling her lungs with untainted air. The dead had it good up here, no London smog to be seen.

"For a moment." Ondina replied, looking out over a see of headstones. "Don't disrespect the dead by being too excited, mind." Ondina wasn't naive, she knew her position among her relatives. The 'spoiled one'. The 'nasty one'. The 'sick one'. The first two she could live with. The third was the reason she didn't try any more. 

@fred

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Ondina muttered ‘whatever’ to what he had said, and Fred just shook his head a little at her. He didn’t understand why she was always needling people… and really didn’t like it when he was the one being needled. Fred forced out a chuckle when Ondina asked if he and Abby had had a less platonic sort of relationship. It was funny, because things with him and Abby weren’t that way at all, but it was dangerously close to the nature of his relationship with Elias. Ondina probably wouldn’t be able to guess that, not with the crucial information of his sexuality missing, but it was uncomfortable nonetheless.

“I never said you were interrupting anything.” He said with a roll of his eyes. He had literally only asked if she was staying, so he didn’t know why she was being so defensive. Besides, even if she wasn’t interrupting something between Fred and Abby, she was interrupting a conversation between Fred and himself – which was arguable more important than any conversation he could have with another person, dead or alive. “Don’t you want to be remembered when you die, Dina?” Fred asked. “Would you want your friends and our family to look at your headstone and say it was just a piece of stone?” That was one of Fred’s worst nightmares, so may he was being too sensitive about it… or maybe Ondina was just being too callous.

Ondina said that she was staying for a moment, and Fred just nodded. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do – Ondina would probably snap if he offered her to sit, so he just let the awkward silence sit in between them instead.

Ondina Nell Weasley

[Ondina Nell Weasley]

i dare you.

ONDINA'S FACE SOURED. She didn't like the fact that Fred had laughed. It irked her to think maybe she was wrong, even if she'd only said it for a reaction in the first place. The one he gave was deemed unsatisfactory and it showed on her face. She hated even the idea of being laughed at.

Quirking her brows, Ondina silently disagreed with Fred. She felt like she was interrupting something. Fred was the kind of miserable hoot that would spend his free time in a cemetery. Obviously since that was exactly where he was. The whole idea of it just made Ondina want to roll her eyes. And she told him as much. It was nothing but wet grass and wasted money.

"I want to be remembered when I'm alive," Ondina corrected. "And I don't plan on dying any time soon." Death was Ondina's ever present enemy. Her nemesis that she thwarted with every breath she took. With her allergies and her asthma, one might surmise that the world was fighting against Ondina. She was way too stubborn to give death the time of day. "What happens after, well... that's somebody else's problem."

With a cruel smirk, Ondina remained thoughtful for a second. Her selfish brain ticking over words and jabs. She kicked a loose pebble across the grass until it knocked Fred's foot. "You don't believe any of that after life crap, right?" she asked unkindly. "You think we all sit up on clouds, and that if we recycle or help an old bag across the road we get the good seats?" She scoffed, rolling her head on her neck and looking up at an overcast sky. Nothing up there but space and rain clouds. 

@fred

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Ondina said that she wanted to be remembered when she was alive, and Fred shook his head, slightly incredulously. “Having one doesn’t mean you can’t have the other.” Fred said. He certainly hoped that people remembered who he was now, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t want them to continue to remember him after he was gone. And then Ondina said that she wasn’t planning on dying any time soon, and Fred closed his eyes to keep himself from seeing red. “Do you really think anyone plans on dying?” He asked scathingly. Abby hadn’t planned to die. Elias hadn’t planned to die. They just had, because that was where the world had placed them. Thinking they didn’t have a choice caused a large lump to form in Fred’s fault, and he swallowed it back. His cousin mentioned that what happened after he death was someone else’s problem, and Fred couldn’t help but wonder how she could be so callous. Didn’t she care about anyone – didn’t she care that they’d be hurting when she was gone?

Fred opened his eyes again when Ondina asked if he believed in an afterlife. “I don’t have a clue.” He answered honestly. He desperately wanted to believe that there was a God, or that there was at least someplace that he would go when he was gone, but… he wasn’t sure if he could. There were too many times that he had asked for a sign and gone unanswered, too many times when he was sure that his friends were just… snuffed out. But that didn’t keep him from hoping that maybe, there was an afterlife. “I figure trying to be a good person regardless of whether there’s an afterlife is a good plan, though.” Being good because you thought you would be rewarded kind of defeated the purpose of being good in the first place, Fred thought.

Ondina Nell Weasley

[Ondina Nell Weasley]

i dare you.

ONDINA FOUND THE ENTIRE LINE OF DISCUSSION POINTLESS. She didn't agree with pretty much anything Fred said, but that might have had something to do with her eternal stubbornness. Though she'd be vexed to admit as much. "Yeah, but I'll only to be present to enjoy one of the two," Ondina said, her voice saccharine. For her, to be remembered after death was about as pointless as a paper umbrella.

Not appreciating the tone Fred took with her, Ondina kissed her teeth and reared her head back to look at him through narrowed eyes. "Well, yes I do, Fred." She said slowly, patronising. "I think they call it suicide." She rolled her shoulders and wrinkled her nose in a rather unattractive manner. "Assisted and otherwise." She was careless about the whole thread of speech. But 'careless' was a familiar state for Ondina, bar her own well being.

"Pff," Ondina huffed through her pinched red lips. She'd never pinned Fred the sentimental type. To consider a thing as flimsy as life after death seemed like a fruitless act altogether. Energy that could be expressed on more worthwhile topics. With more concrete outcomes and rewards. She rolled her eyes at the notion of being good to be good. Nobody did that, Ondina thought. They just pretended they did. "Well, you lemme know when you meet a genuinely selfless person." She looked down at her nails, ran the bad of her thumb across the sharp, filed ends. "Personally, I just don't think we're built for it." 

@fred

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!