is there somewhere [liona]

[Deleted]

So, Jamie had kissed Andy. Or Andy had kissed Jamie? Either way, there had been a kiss with someone who was not Liona, and even though Jamie didn't regret kissing Andy, not one lick, she knew that her girlfriend deserved to know what had happened. And there was something else that Jamie wanted to talk to her about, too. That one kiss had unlocked so much in Jamie. She hadn't exactly been ignoring the feelings, but she'd never had to pay them much attention before, because she thought that everything was one-sided... and now it didn't seem that way anymore. Jamie wasn't sure there was a way this could go where she didn't end up with Andy. She wanted her. But she loved Liona, too, and that was the crux of the issue. So many people didn't seem to understand that it was possible to love more than one person at once, and Jamie wasn't sure what to do about that. She figured that honesty was going to be the best way to get this whole thing figured out. Jamie was good at being honest about her feelings, and she just hoped that this meeting with Liona wasn't going to be a total disaster. Maybe it wouldn't be possible to get everything she wanted, but Jamie didn't want to leave behind a broken heart if she could help it. 

@lionaanna

[Deleted]

It was a pretty nice afternoon today. Nice day for her to spend with Jamie, who had coincidentally invited her over. It wasn’t sure a normal invite though, which is what had Liona feeling a little bit.. curious. Jamie had told her, in the invite, that she’d wanted to talk with her about something important. Running through her mind trying to figure out what it could be hadn’t produced any viable results so she was rather curious what wa so important that it required specific instruction that they discuss it. It wasn’t quite nerves she was feeling, surprisingly enough. She wasn’t itching to pull at the earring in her ear as she thought about it. However, considering that it was rather normal for conversations that followed ‘we need to talk’, especially between people who were in a relationship, to not be favorable conversations for the person the words were being directed at. Her and Jamie had been great. At least she felt like that anyway. Maybe that was the problem? Jamie hadn’t said anything to her though. There was only one way to find out. She’d accepted the invite and would just listen to what she had to say. She didn’t think it had anything to do with them yet, as always, there was a staying sting of doubt, restless, in the back of her mind. She knocked on the door of the apartment that Jamie had directed her to and waited patiently, sorting through her thoughts.

Tag; @jamie
OOTD;Here

[Deleted]

Jamie wasn’t sure how to go about this whole situation, but she was going to try her best not to hurt anyone. She opened the door to her and Odette’s apartment and saw her girlfriend standing there. Jamie offered a weak smile. “Hey.” She said slowly. “Come in.” Jamie knew she was probably giving off the wrong impression – she was acting like this was a breakup, and it really wasn’t meant to be the precursor to anything other than a discussion about her feelings for Andy. Communication was important. Jamie led Liona back to her bedroom, and gestured for her girlfriend to sit on the bed. Jamie closed the door behind her, and then considered it for a moment. She and Odette hadn’t exactly discussed an open-door policy when Jamie had people in the room, since it wasn’t like her sister could say that the door always had to be open with boys – Jamie liked more than just boys. Then again, she was old enough, and she hoped that Odette trusted her enough, that it wouldn’t be an issue. Jamie moved to sit down on the bed, as well, and took a deep breath. “Andy kissed me.” It was not the most delicate way to bring up the topic, but Jamie figured it was at least enough that Liona wouldn’t be left thinking that Jamie was breaking up with her.

@lionaanna

[Deleted]

There was a short period of time before the door opened to reveal Jamie, standing before her and looking as pretty as she always did. Except the smile that she gave when she saw Liona didn't convey the same feelings that she felt. It was different. And when Liona entered the apartment at her direction, she felt off immediately. "Hey," she tossed back, feeling a little bit confused. Normally she would have hugged her and then kissed her just a little bit too long. She'd missed her after. Reading the air now and her body language didn't exactly tell her that the gesture would be welcomed. And if that was what she was reading now, she expected things not to be quite so well with them. She hadn't done anything. She hadn't gotten angry lately; not that she'd had a reason to be. She had been a good girlfriend. Faithful. As honest as she could be. Attentive. What could possibly be wrong? She followed her back to what she assumed was her room, not really paying attention to the decor. Not asking for a tour. Her feet took her to the bed where she planted herself, once again at Jamie's direction. There didn't seem like enough time between her sitting down and what happened next. Once the door was closed, Jamie turned and told her that Andy had kissed her. Andy being Andromeda Lestrange. Jamie's best friend. Her face remained blank but her eyes seemingly looked past Jamie now, her head clouding with thoughts. The last time she'd spoken with Andromeda, it hadn't seemed as if the girl knew that Liona and Jamie had been seeing one another. It had been a while since then, maybe something had changed? Had the girl known that they were together and she'd kissed her anyway? "And you said...?" There wasn't any tone in her voice. She just needed more information. She needed to know how she was supposed to react to the news.

Tag; @jamie
OOTD;Here

[Deleted]

Liona wasn’t angry; she just seemed curious. Jamie supposed that was her best-case scenario, because she didn’t know how on earth she was going to explain everything that had happened if Liona didn’t keep an open mind. “I told her I didn’t understand what was happening.” Jamie began, trying to avoid Liona’s gaze. She didn’t know why she felt guilty, because the whole purpose of this conversation was so that Liona knew what was happening, and Jamie wasn’t doing anything behind her back. “I thought – Andy and Phil seemed so…” Inseparable. They knew each other in a way that she could never hope to understand, and there was a part of the Hufflepuff that knew that if Andy had a soulmate – one singular person on who her life depended – it was Phil. That didn’t hurt, because Jamie was fairly certain if she had to choose a soulmate, it wouldn’t be Andy, either. She didn’t know who it would be, though. A traitorous voice whispered that it definitely wasn’t Liona, but Jamie shook away that thought before she could let it take hold. “I need you to understand that what I’m about to say doesn’t mean that I don’t care about you.” Jamie said, for once turning so that she could look at the Slytherin who was sitting on her bed. “You make me a better person, and I don’t want to lose that.” She didn’t want to lose Liona’s spark, the constant reach for more – I want to be better. Jamie took a long, deep breath so that Liona would have time to digest what she had said before speaking again. “I love Andy. Love her.” Jamie said, stressing the word again so that Liona would not tangle herself in trying to discover Jamie’s meaning. She loved Andy romantically. But she hadn’t stopped loving Liona, and that was what she was struggling to articulate. “I always thought my heart was too big for my body, and – I would love the whole world, if the world would let me.” Jamie said, stumbling a little over her words. “I want to love you both. I do love you both.” Jamie sighed. That was what it all came down to. She wanted to say something more, but she just… couldn’t. Anything she could think to say sounded like a guilt trip or an ultimatum, and she didn’t want either of those things. She just wanted to love both of the people she loved.

@lionaanna

[Deleted]

Her heart was so loud in her ears it almost blocked out everything that happened next. She still wasn't quite looking at Jamie, trying to focus. This was important, she needed to really focus and understand what was happening. What Jamie said next wasn't exactly what she wanted to hear. She didn't understand what was happening, but she didn't stop it. Something about Andy and Phil? She wasn't finishing her sentences. And Liona wasn't understanding, wasn't quite processing what was happening now. When Jamie spoke again, there were more words she didn't understand. Or rather, words that she didn't want to understand. They sounded like the prelude to a break up. She was saying that she didn't want to lose her and Liona could only think that whatever it was she was going to say would give her every reason to leave. But because this was Jamie, that would never happen right? Jamie was goodness and light and sunshine and warmth. She was saying that she didn't want to lose her though. Liona was so very still and still so unfocused but what Jamie said next, when Jamie said those words, she did focus now. Her eyes focused on Jamie, saw the way that Jamie was looking at her, saw the way Jamie looked and the desperation in her face. Jamie loved Andromeda. It should have come as some drowning revelation. It didn't, Jamie loved a lot of people. That wasn't surprising. It shouldn't have been surprising really but Liona kept moving back and forth between being surprised and not. That wasn't the worst part for Liona. It was what she didn't hear in those first few seconds. Jamie loved Andromeda but she only cared about her. It was something she'd never said to her anyway. It had never come up. That thought was so sealed in her mind that Jamie's last words, that Jamie loved them both, barely registered. It felt like such an after thought. Because this was about Andromeda and how much Jamie loved Andromeda. Her head hurt. Her heart hurt. She loved Jamie. Of course she loved Jamie. But she wasn't going to say that now. "Did Andromeda know about us?" she said the words simply, trying not to let any anger build. "Last time I spoke to her, she didn't seem to know. Did you stop her from kissing you? Was it then that you told her? Was it then that you thought about me?" She was trying so hard not to get angry. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, one that felt deeper than any she'd ever taken in her life. "Why is this the first time I'm hearing about this..." she didn't even think to clarify the fact that she was talking about her telling her she loved her. She was too far gone in her mind. "Why tell me that now? When also telling me that you kissed.. no.. that you love someone else too?" That she loved Andromeda more. Logically, she couldn't blame her for that. Andromeda had probably been around longer. That didn't stop it from hurting. That didn't stop her from hurting.

Tag; @jamie
OOTD;Here