Post by juniper minerva mcgonagall on Mar 28, 2023 20:01:42 GMT -7
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How? How in Merlin's good name was this caring about his health? As Rhys uncrossed his arms, Juniper did the reverse, folding hers tightly as she stared up at him. Despite barely being at his shoulders, she never felt like height made a difference in their relationship. Her words made up for that. But for the first time since she started in on him, she felt herself faltering a bit. He...had a good point. There had been other injuries, and there would continue to be more. The mental preparation she thought she had put herself through clearly wasn't enough. Despite knowing everything that could happen, the unknowing of when or how was what had been eating away at her silently. Today was just the result of it bubbling over finally. And this wasn't even that bad compared to what it could be. She had nightmares the first few nights of every long trip. They seemed cartoonish in nature but always ended with Rhys severely debilitated or dead. That wasn't normal at all.
Juniper didn't have a good answer about why she couldn't trust him to handle things on his own. Better yet, she didn't know how to phrase her feelings. Because it wasn't exactly a lack of trust, more so that constant worry digging away at the back of her skull. It always went away within a day or two of him being back, which so far had been consistent and relatively normal. But that was because the training kept things on schedule. She knew the second he was fully hired, timelines for jobs would become altered and sporadic. One didn't need to ask too many questions from other cursebreakers to find that out. So maybe that was part of the issue too. That unknown future where he'd be in and out constantly, walking back through the door to their flat with his body broken in a slightly different way from the last job. She didn't care that the pain was 'okay' or 'tolerable' because he'd been through worse, or that the lycanthropy made everything else seem easy to deal with. That was such an incredibly fucked up way to view an injury.
Finally, Juniper broke her brief silence, "I do trust you, Rhys. I really do. But how do you think it makes me feel sitting here for weeks on end, wondering if you're dead in a pyramid or trapped in a cave somewhere in Peru or whatever? I think about it so much that it's like I'm ordering lunch off of a goddamn menu. And then you come home, acting like everything is fine, but you're actually hurt. Even though this time it's just a sprained shoulder, it triggers every single fear that I have while I sit here alone. And you brush it off as if it's nothing. Except it's not nothing. Because while it's just your shoulder today, maybe next time it's a missing finger, or a completely shattered leg, or you're dead."
Juniper hadn't realized throughout this that she'd grabbed onto the counter to hold herself steady, everything that had knowingly and unknowingly been bottled up, erupting all at once. And then it was all out of her. She felt almost like a deflated balloon, the last bit of air whimpering out pathetically. "I'm not going to tell you to stop, because that's not fair of me to do, and I know you love it so far. It just scares me when there's nothing I can do and you come back like this."
Juniper didn't have a good answer about why she couldn't trust him to handle things on his own. Better yet, she didn't know how to phrase her feelings. Because it wasn't exactly a lack of trust, more so that constant worry digging away at the back of her skull. It always went away within a day or two of him being back, which so far had been consistent and relatively normal. But that was because the training kept things on schedule. She knew the second he was fully hired, timelines for jobs would become altered and sporadic. One didn't need to ask too many questions from other cursebreakers to find that out. So maybe that was part of the issue too. That unknown future where he'd be in and out constantly, walking back through the door to their flat with his body broken in a slightly different way from the last job. She didn't care that the pain was 'okay' or 'tolerable' because he'd been through worse, or that the lycanthropy made everything else seem easy to deal with. That was such an incredibly fucked up way to view an injury.
Finally, Juniper broke her brief silence, "I do trust you, Rhys. I really do. But how do you think it makes me feel sitting here for weeks on end, wondering if you're dead in a pyramid or trapped in a cave somewhere in Peru or whatever? I think about it so much that it's like I'm ordering lunch off of a goddamn menu. And then you come home, acting like everything is fine, but you're actually hurt. Even though this time it's just a sprained shoulder, it triggers every single fear that I have while I sit here alone. And you brush it off as if it's nothing. Except it's not nothing. Because while it's just your shoulder today, maybe next time it's a missing finger, or a completely shattered leg, or you're dead."
Juniper hadn't realized throughout this that she'd grabbed onto the counter to hold herself steady, everything that had knowingly and unknowingly been bottled up, erupting all at once. And then it was all out of her. She felt almost like a deflated balloon, the last bit of air whimpering out pathetically. "I'm not going to tell you to stop, because that's not fair of me to do, and I know you love it so far. It just scares me when there's nothing I can do and you come back like this."
rhys alexander greyback ● 588 ● Song by Artist
MADE BY VEL OF GS + ADOX 2.0
