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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 13:21:20 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 13:21:20 GMT -7
@magdalena @jill9 "Do you want me to put it out...?" he shook his head a little at nikolai's question. "no." it wouldn't help. it wasn't the fire that was the problem it was the memory that had come flooding back into his mind. he closed his eyes as he tried to forget but it seemed his mind was set on reminding him of all the reasons he shouldn't care. all the reasons he shouldn't be thinking of this as a bad thing and all the reasons why it was a good thing. the only problem was he didn't usually let himself remember, he worked hard to ignore it and push the details out of his mind and just remember what he needed to to keep the hate alive. he couldn't help but flinch when magi rested one hand on his back and the other on his knee. the cup he'd been holding slipped from his fingers. "She can't hurt you anymore, Raleigh. Never again." the cup hit the ground as magi spoke, he heard it shatter on the wooden floors, the tea that had been inside it splattered from the point of impact and he leaned forward slightly, resting his elbows on his knees as he took a few deep breathes. he couldn't work out when his stomach had started feeling like it was going to jump out of his mouth and he was vaguley aware of the cold sweat that had broken out over his body, he just needed to get the control back. it was slipping and he didn't like it. the small amount of control over how he'd been feeling was slipping away and he didn't know how to handle it. "they're dead magi .." he breathed out as he pressed one of his hands to his stomach and he ducked his head lower, slightly toward the knees his elbows were resting on and he hoped he could avoid ruining their floor with more than just tea. he was well aware of the fact he'd repeated what he'd told her before in the hall but it was as if he was seeing it in some sort of new light. this grief process was something he'd never understand and he'd never understood why it felt so awful.
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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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Mar 7, 2017 17:34:46 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 7, 2017 17:34:46 GMT -7
@magdalena , @leigh <3 Magdalena stuck her tongue out at him and Nikolai couldn't help but laugh quietly. Granted, this wasn't the best time to be laughing, but Magdalena was a brat. He was sure Raleigh knew this, but Nikolai wanted to try to be understanding and helpful during this time as well. "Is there anything else the two of you need?" One heartbroken and hurt, the other pregnant and exhausted. Well, Niko supposed if he could take care of these two all night, and infant wouldn't be much different. Raleigh's one word was heard clearly, and Niko gave him a curt nod, finishing off the fire. It was fairly strong now, enough to warm up at least the leaving room. As soon as he went to stand up and turn around, it was like in slow motion that he saw Raleigh drop the tea cup and it fall to the floor, the crash ringing in his ears, glass flying on the floor and the hot tea soaking into the carpet. Nikolai twitched, but quickly regained composure and stood up, going to grab a cloth from the kitchen. He came back and first went to grab all of the pieces of glass off the carpet.
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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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Mar 22, 2017 22:17:31 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 22, 2017 22:17:31 GMT -7
Despite her silent spite fire antics towards Nikolai, she still flashed him a smile and shook her head in answer when he asked if there was anything the needed. "If you want to go up to bed, Nikolai... We'll be fine." Now whether or not Magdalena went up eventually that was still to be decided. It wasn't like she'd been tired before Raleigh's appearance.
Raleigh was still in shock. No surprise. He hadn't said when he had found out, but it must have been tonight since he'd showed up so late. He wouldn't have been so frantic when they'd answered the door. Most likely that as soon as he'd found out he'd rushed here, not knowing where else to go. So, when the cup slipped from his hands and shattered on the floor she didn't even flinch. Or when he moved forward. She did momentarily pull her hands away though as he processed and finally responded.... And when he did her heart broke a little. "And you're not, Raleigh. It won't be easy, or fun. But you're not alone. Whatever you need, we're here." She softly responded, not daring to reach towards him yet. She could be extremely expressive and cuddly when she wanted, but from dating Nikolai for so long she'd learned to restrain herself when needed.
@leigh @jill9
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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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Apr 6, 2017 13:21:50 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Apr 6, 2017 13:21:50 GMT -7
@magdalena @jill9 raleigh didn't even notice nik was cleaning up the mess he'd made on the floor of the living room till magi told him he could go to bed if he wanted to. that they didn't need him if he didn't want to stay. he was thankful for nik in that moment, what he'd done that night. "And you're not, Raleigh. It won't be easy, or fun. But you're not alone. Whatever you need, we're here." he was torn from his thoughts about nik as he turned his head to magi and he shook his head slightly, a pained look on his face as he shifted. "it's not. that's the thing. that's what makes it so awful .. it's not going to be hard. it's not even a bad thing. them dying .. it's a good thing. they're gone. they can't hurt us anymore. they can't hurt river .. or dusti .. or elizabeth .." he said, not pausing to take a breath before going on. "that's what hurts so much .. that's what i hate .. i'm glad my parents are dead and i feel guilty for feeling that way .. i shouldn't. but i do and i don't understand it magi." he said as he took in a deep breath and he shifted forward, moving to wrap his arms around her tightly. in their relationship, their friendship that had spanned seven years and only gotten stronger, he wasn't the affectionate one. he'd grown to accept that she hugged. that she was affectionate and he tolerated it from her because he loved her. it was a strange feeling to be the one that needed the hug, that needed to know she was there in that moment. he closed his eyes and shook his head a little. "what sort of person does that make me .." he said quietly. not loud enough for anyone but magi to see. she was the only one who he'd ever be able to ask that question to. he didn't care how people saw him. he was who he was. he was the product of how he was raised and he'd learned at a young age that was nothing to apologize for. but now? in the moment when he should be able to be the most himself .. he felt like someone he didn't know.
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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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Apr 21, 2017 17:42:16 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2017 17:42:16 GMT -7
@magdalena , @leigh <3 Nikolai waved Magdalena away, making it clear that he wasn't planning on going to bed. The two of them would probably end up falling asleep talking, and Nikolai wanted to be able to clean up after them and make sure they were comfortable. But all those thoughts had disappeared after Raleigh had dropped the tea cup. It wasn't a large one, so picking up the glass pieces wasn't too hard. Thankfully they all broke fairly evenly and there were no smaller pieces to find. He ended up bringing them into the kitchen and throwing them into the trash can.
Grabbing a towel and some carpet cleaner, Niko made his way back into the living room, silently listening to their words. He knelt down on the carpet, spraying it with the cleaner and sitting back for a few minutes to allow it to soak in. The carpet wasn't a light color, it was a dark blue, which made it much easier to get the stains out. He heard Raleigh comment on three other people, those who he assumed were his siblings. Nikolai couldn't imagine anything happening to any of his sisters, and he was somewhat glad that the terrible things that had happened, had happened to him. Niko threw the blanket onto the carpet and pressed down on it, soaking everything up.
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last online Apr 20, 2024 5:08:05 GMT -7
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May 10, 2017 20:39:44 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on May 10, 2017 20:39:44 GMT -7
Raleigh was hugging her again, and Magdalena raised her arms to return the tight gesture. She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes as he spoke. He was struggling. So much. His parents had been horrible, horrible people. And now they were dead. And he had his three younger siblings to think about. And the overall mess of the entire situation. "It doesn't change who you are, Raleigh. You'll always be you, no matter what happens." She whispered back. No matter what his parents had done in their seven years of friendship he'd always been the Raleigh she knew. He'd always been her best friend. "No one and nothing can ever change that. No matter what happens." Raleigh was strong. He'd get through all this. He'd figure it out. And she'd be there to help whenever necessary. Just like he'd been there for her when her mother had died.
(haha, no idea what to say or do. XD Probably start wrapping this up in the next few posts.)
@leigh @jill9
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