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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 12, 2017 18:56:54 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 12, 2017 18:56:54 GMT -7
Two words. Earth shattering. Mind numbing. Soul crushing. One word. Suffocating. Orphaned. Dead. Dusti didn't know why she... Why she felt this way. Why there was a strange tightness in her chest. Why she felt like she couldn't breath. Why her head spun. Why her stomach knotted. What Dusti did know was that her parents were dead. Both of them. Her mother, the psychotic witch she was, had murdered her husband. Dusti's father. Not biological, but still her father. Or the closest thing Dusti had to one. And then, days later, she'd died. Dead. Just like that. Dusti knew the knews was already spreading around the school. Something like that couldn't. Soon, everyone would know. Everyone would know that the Flint kids' mother was a murderer. Everyone would know that the Flint kids were orphanned. Dusti didn't want to be around anyone when they found out. She wanted to just be sucked into the shadows and never come out. So much so that she'd even been avoiding Albus today. Albus, who she was willing to tell anything to now. Ever since the Yule Ball when she'd told him every single secret she'd kept from him about the Flint family. About the abuse, about each scar. He knew everything. But both her parents deaths was.... too much. Dusti had locked herself in the Room of Requirements. Knowing it'd keep out everyone. It'd make sure no one disturbed her. The room was dark, only a few candles burning. Just enough that she knew where the door was and wouldn't stub her toe on the furniture if she moved around. Good thing she wasn't moving. Dusti hadn't moved in hours, just sat there in the dark, staring into the flames of a candle. Not caring how long she sat here. Not caring if people were looking for her. Just... not caring. @al (obviously the room will open for him. It knows what she really needs.)
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 12, 2017 19:45:53 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 12, 2017 19:45:53 GMT -7
@dusti al felt sick thinking about what dusti was going through. he knew. he finally knew why she hated going home and everything her parents had done to her. she had opened up to him the night of the yule ball and while all that had happened, he knew she would be effected by what had happened. macus flint had died days ago, killed by his wife who very recently had been locked up in azkaban but the news had come through that she had died too. too loose both parents in a matter of days, even parents that were as awful as hers. he couldn't imagine it. he loved his parents, more than he'd ever admit and more than he'd ever be able to let them know and he couldn't imagine the pain of loosing one of them.
but he knew the circumstances were different. in a way he understood slightly. he had lost his mother the night she had lost her memory. she had lost every trace of wat had made her their mother and while she was slowly, very slowly, coming back to them it was taking time. but something was broken there and al didn't know if it could be fixed. he walked down a hall, trying to find dusti. there were other people looking but he didn't care about them. he wanted to be the one to find her. he jumped slightly when a door started appearing out of the wall next to him and he rested his hand on his chest. she was hiding in the one place she knew wouldn't keep him out. even if she tried. he waited a moment before pushing the door open. he chewed his lip as he caught sight of her, sitting and staring into the flame of a candle. he crossed to her and kneeled down next to her. "dusti." he said softly, so that she would know it was him and hopefully wouldn't freak out. normally he'd just sit there, wait for her to show him she wanted some sort of attention but this was different. her life had almost literally fallen down around her, again. first when she had found out marcus wasn't her dad and now this. he moved to settle next to her, wrapping his arms around her and he rested his chin on the top of her head gently as he hugged her. "i'm here dusti .." he said softly as the candle light in the room suddenly dimmed slightly.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 12, 2017 20:22:47 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 12, 2017 20:22:47 GMT -7
Dusti didn't hear the door open. Didn't see the flicker of the flame created by the slightest breeze. Didn't see him kneel down next to her. Didn't think that someone could possibly find her. Didn't remember that the Room of Requirements would never lock Albus out. No matter how hard she'd tried in the past, it always let him in if he wanted.
"Dusti."
That was the moment when the whole world came crashing back down on her. Dusti moved, for the first time in hours. It wasn't much, just a flicker of her gaze from the candle to Albus. Just her name, that was all he said. Dusti didn't respond, just... stared at her boyfriend. Honestly she didn't know how to react anymore. If she should speak. What she should feel. She hated her parents. Hated both of them. But she hadn't... She hadn't wanted them dead. And even though she'd hated him, her father, Marcus had been the only one that got her. Her mother? No, she deserved to rot in prison.
Dusti shut her eyes and leaned into his touch, tucking her arms in tight as he held her close. That was when the first sob racked her body. Dusti, who refused to be vulnerable or let people see when she was hurting.
Dusti was crying.
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 15, 2017 20:34:43 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 15, 2017 20:34:43 GMT -7
@dusti he was glad she didn't fight him. he'd been expecting her to buck against his touch which he'd have been totally fine with. this wasn't exactly a situation either of them knew what to do with. he wasn't used to being the one to provide comfort. he settled down with her against the wall, keeping her tucked against his chest as he rubbed his hand up and down her spine lightly. he knew he couldn't say anything, he'd wait till she decided to talk and if she didn't well he'd be okay with that too. he sat against the wall and swallowed. her sobs were tearing through him, he could feel every single one that wracked her body as he held her against his chest and he closed his eyes, leaning his head down to rest his cheek against hers and he just kept holding her. he knew there was no point in telling her it would be okay and he hated when people told upset people to calm down. clearly if they were upset, unless obviously it wasn't a serious upset, that people should be allowed to let their emotions out. he didn't, he hated it but that was just him. he knew people were different. dusti was almost worse than he was though and he knew that so this time, he knew she needed this. more than anything. if she was crying it was too much to keep in. he took a breath and opened his eyes, feeling a tear of his own run down his cheek. it hurt, it hurt him so much to listen to and feel how much dusti was hurting and knowing he couldn't do anything for her yet. it was almost killing him.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 15, 2017 23:22:48 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 15, 2017 23:22:48 GMT -7
Dusti couldn't remember when the last time she cried was. It'd been... years. Even longer since she'd let someone seen her cry. She wanted to be strong, to make people think nothing could hurt her, nothing could reach or rattle her. And most things didn't. Dusti was strong, stronger than most people ever realized. She had to be, it was how she'd protected Rusti all these years and survived her parents. So why now..? Why couldn't she be strong now?
Normally being in Al's arms when she was mad or upset helped. Albus had calmed her raging temper countless times by doing exactly what he was doing now. But it wasn't working now. It didn't make her swallow her tears and return her to normal. Instead it seemed to rip the emotions out of her, forcing her to confront every painful and soul wrenching feeling. His embrace left her vulnerable, weak, and exposed. So, she just kept crying. In the process she'd finally wrapped her arms around his torso, her head against his shoulder as the tears and sobs kept coming. Relentless, as if they'd never end. She just held onto Albus more desperately, silently pleading him not to leave. That he was the only thing keeping her together now. Because her world had completely crumbled around her, and he was one of the only things that remained.
Dusti didn't know how long they sat there. Arms around each other in the dark, the only sound being Dusti's sob. It must have been quite some time, because that sole candle had burned down to just a stub. Dusti's sobs had, thankfully, begun to slow and quiet. Not entirely stopped, but at least she wasn't physically shaking from the emotion. Only then, when Dusti was so thoroughly cried out that she had a raging headache and her cheeks her stained and eyes rimmed red, did she managed her first coherent words of the day. "It's not fair." She hadn't pulled away or looked at him, her voice muffled by the fabric of Al's shirt. It wasn't fair. After everything they'd done. Every scar, every fear, those paralyzing nights where all she wanted was to make it until the next day. It wasn't fair that they got to get away with everything. That they'd never have to pay for what they'd done to her and her siblings.
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 19, 2017 0:16:41 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2017 0:16:41 GMT -7
@dusti al had started to feel a little relived when dusti's gut wrenching sobs settled down into quiet ones. he had started to get a little worried that he would need to go find someone to help her. he had just held her through it all, been the solid thing she'd needed in that moment. he still had his cheek pressed against hers, feeling the wet spot where her tears her been falling and he chewed his lip a little, wondering if he should conjure up something for her to clean herself up with but he decided to cross that bridge when she calmed down enough to think a little straighter. he had one hand resting on her hair, his thumb stroking her hair softly as he used a few fingers to rub circles onto the base of her neck with his other hand in what he hoped was a comforting gesture.
"It's not fair." it was muffled and it was soft but it was something. he turned his head slightly and pressed his lips against her temple, and he shifted his hold on her slightly, shifting an arm to her waist and he wrapped it around her back, his hand rubbing up and down her side. he just wanted to make her feel better and at this point he was desperate on how to do that so he knew he was probably over doing it with the comforting gestures but he had nothing else. there were no words he could say. except. "i know." he said gently, hugging her a little tighter. "but you're probably going to make yourself sick if you keep going." he said softly to her, chewing his lip a little. he wasn't telling her to stop feeling like she was but he was worried she'd need medical help if this kept up much longer. he'd broken down once before and it had been nothing like this, though it had left him feeling drained and awful for a while so he could only assume she was feeling worse.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Feb 20, 2017 8:32:15 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Feb 20, 2017 8:32:15 GMT -7
Albus' words helped settle her. Helped her stay grounded. I know. That was all she needed to hear. That even though he didn't know personally how terrible her parents had been he understood why she was feeling this way. Not only that, but he was right about making herself sick if she kept this up. She could already feel it, in that growing migraine and cramps in her stomach from the violent sobs.
Dusti just curled up in his arms, her arms and knees tucked in tight. She didn't respond yet, just tried to stop crying. Tried, and so far failed. How... how did people even cope with this? How did they function and act like it didn't matter? How could she be the offspring of someone so psychotic to commit murder? "What's wrong with my family..?" Why her family? Why did Dusti's have to be so thoroughly screwed up that they just had to add murder to their already long list of problems? Why did the parents have to forever stain their children. They could escape the abuse but they could never escape their fate of being a murderer's child.
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 4, 2017 23:03:10 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 4, 2017 23:03:10 GMT -7
@dusti "What's wrong with my family..?" he didn't know the answer to that. he couldn't turn around and tell her nothing was. for two reasons. the first was she wouldn't believe him and the second was because it simply wasn't true. there had been a lot wrong in her family and while he was convinced he still didn't know the whole story, well he knew dusti's story but she had three siblings that he didn't. there could be more for all he knew. he pressed his lips to her temple, cupping her chin with his hand as he did as he pulled away slightly and he shook his head a little. "i don't know dust." he said softly as he kept one hand curved around her chin and the other rubbing up and down her back still. he never thought he'd be this person, the person that could provide physical comfort to another living thing. it had never been in his nature to be the sympathetic one, to be the one willing to do anything to stop someone's pain and to be the person someone leaned on heavily. and yet here he was, wishing he could do something and wishing he could stop her pain. "i don't know what to tell you, love." he said softly as he rested his chin on her shoulder gently. "i'm sorry. i'm so sorry it happened and that you didn't get the chance to rise above them. to show them you were better." he said softly.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 0:14:30 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 0:14:30 GMT -7
Dusti didn't know what she was expecting as an answer. What could Albus possibly say to something like that? Would anything ever make this better? No, unfortunately. Nothing would fix the fact that her real father didn't want her, that the man that raised her had been abusive, and her mother had been a murderer. Nothing could make it better. But when Al's hand cupped her face and his lips touched one of her temples she leaned into that touch. He might not be able to fix her messed up life, but at least he made her feel safe. Al had always made her feel safe, even now when she felt her most vulnerable.
Dusti finally moved in Al's arms to return the embrace, her own arms wrapping around his waist. She held onto him tightly, as if desperate for him to stay close. And the last comment he made.... about being showing them she was better than them. Dusti's grip tightened just a little as she dropped her forehead against his shoulder, her face hidden. "I'm not. I'm just like them, Al. I'll never be better than them..."
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 0:25:16 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 0:25:16 GMT -7
@dusti he felt the shift in her, the way she tightened her hold on him and started gripping, like she was afraid to let go and it made him shift his hold on her again, he wrapped his arms around her back, pulling her against his chest tightly as she pressed her face into his shoulder. he swallowed as she spoke again. "I'm not. I'm just like them, Al. I'll never be better than them..." he shook his head slightly, lowering his head down so his face was close to hers once again and he rested his head against hers, his arms tightening a little more if that was possible. "that's not true. you already are. because you care." he said as he lifted one hand to rest it on the back of her head, never loosening his hold with his other arm. "you care. that makes you better. different." he said as he stroked his hand over her hair and he felt his heart breaking for her. how could she think she was like them? she was nothing like them. in the slightest. "the fact you're hurting now .. proves that dust." he let his hand fall from her hair so he could hug her with both arms again and he shook his head slightly. "don't let them keep making you feel worthless .."
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 0:50:01 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 0:50:01 GMT -7
Albus held her tighter almost in unison with her, as if knowing what she'd been silently conveying with the gesture. And when he spoke.. Well, if she hadn't already cried herself out she might have cried again. None the less she swallowed hard, as if trying to bury the emotions, ad shoot her head. "I shouldn't. Why... Why do I bloody care..?!" She softly but desperately asked. She didn't want to care. Not about them. Her parents were horrible people! She should be happy that they were gone! Out and about like normal, unfazed. Not here, crying and so broken that she seemed to have forgotten how to function entirely. After everything she'd endured. The mental, emotional, and physical abuse. The fear. The pain. The scars on her back (that up until the Yule Ball Albus had never even known where they'd come from). After everything, how could she possibly care about them? "I don't want to care about what happened. Why can't I just be happy that they're gone?" What was wrong with her?
It looked like Dusti did have a few tears still left. Because as Albus spoke, telling her to not let them make her feel worthless she choked back a quiet sob. Wasn't she? Coward. Disgrace. Her parents had called her countless things her entire life. She couldn't even protect her siblings from her parents torment. Now that they were gone... It almost seemed to reaffirm all her flaws. That they'd been right about her all along. Dusti's crying this time was (thankfully) much tamer than before. Dusti didn't speak though, just swallowed hard as tears fell and shook her head against his shoulder.
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 12:01:25 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 12:01:25 GMT -7
@dusti "I shouldn't. Why... Why do I bloody care..?! I don't want to care about what happened. Why can't I just be happy that they're gone?" he let her ask those questions. he didn't try to interject his opinion until she was finished, knowing it was important for her to feel that. as much as he was inept at dealing with his own emotions he knew that bottling them wasn't good. he'd come to regret the actions that bottling his had caused during the last year and he was trying to not do that anymore but it was hard to change. he knew that better than anyone. "because you're better." he said simply when he was sure she'd finished. he was going to sound like a broken record but he wanted her to start focusing on that. that she was a better person than her parents had ever hoped to be. "you care because you know it's the right thing .. " he said as he looked at her, hoping he wasn't making a mess of what he was trying to say. "they wouldn't care .. you know they wouldn't. yet you do .. that tells me you're different." he said as he rubbed his hand up and down her arm as she buried herself more into his chest and he chewed his lip slightly, willing the candles in the room to light up again, knowing they wouldn't be leaving for quite a while and he didn't want them to be sitting in the dark, darkness was the last thing she needed right now. he knew she was crying again, her tears soaking through the shirt he was wearing and the sobs wracking the body he was holding in his arms and he shifted a little, so he was lounging against the wall instead of sitting against it. "why don't you lay down .." he suggested softly, shifting a little so she could if she took up his suggestion.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 5, 2017 19:13:15 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2017 19:13:15 GMT -7
Dusti inhaled sharply as he spoke, telling her how she was better than them and that was why she cared. How could Albus see that? How was he capable of finding something good in her? He'd always been able to, as if able to see past everything bad about her to find something decent and human. That small part of her that hadn't been ruined by her parents. Her crying was minimal at the moment, just tears streaming. She didn't try to respond because part of her knew he was right. No she just stayed close and cried silently for several minutes. Until he finally suggested she lay down and moved just enough to make that easier for her.
Dusti swallowed, but finally nodded. She pulled away, releasing him so she could use her hands to try to wipe away all the tears that had stained her cheeks. Taking several slow, deep breaths, the girl tried to compose herself. To erase all traces of her breaking down but it wasn't working that well. Shifting even more she curled up on her side and lay her head in Al's lap. "Can... Can you stay here with me for a while..?" Dusti wasn't ready to face the world yet.
@al
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 19, 2017 2:10:22 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 19, 2017 2:10:22 GMT -7
@dusti he was glad when she seemed to agree with him telling her to lay down. it might be just what she needed and he knew that breaking down could take it out of a person. he sat there as she wiped her face and he wished he'd been able to do something to keep the tears from her face in the first place but he couldn't. he'd just have to try in the future. he never wanted to see hr so broken again, though he doubted there was much left that could do that to her, rusti and him would be the two biggest things and raleigh and river, them too. he stretched out his legs so she'd have somewhere more comfortable to rest her head and he leaned forward slightly, running his hand down her back as she curled up and used him as a pillow. "Can... Can you stay here with me for a while..?" he nodded a little and shifted his hand from her back to her hair, stroking his hand over it as he leaned down to kiss her cheek. "i'd stay with you forever dusti. take as long as you need." he said softly as he looked down at her face in the soft candlelight that still struggled to fully light the room.
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last online Mar 28, 2024 16:10:51 GMT -7
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Mar 30, 2017 18:37:07 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Mar 30, 2017 18:37:07 GMT -7
Dusti didn't move once she was settled down with her head in his lap. Her eyes closed, and she let out a slow, deep breath. Trying to stay calm. She definitely needed to calm down. Stop... caring about all of this. About her parents death. About her parents in general. she was free of them. They were gone. They wouldn't be able to hurt her or any of her siblings ever again.
Her breathing turned shaky as he spoke, sayed he'd stay forever and to take as long as she needed. Against his leg she nodded her head just a touch. "That offer from summer.... Is it still good?" She softly asked, refusing to look at him as she spoke. The offer to move out with him. After graduation. Because right now she realized that what he'd said about staying with her forever? She wanted that.
@al
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