even when you're bleeding you're worth fighting for [tw]

[Deleted]

january 1, 2024

It was beginning of the New Year. Nat didn't know when the clock had struck midnight - she had just slid from 2023 to 2024 without any fanfare. There were more important things to worry about than fireworks and new year's kisses and champagne. Her siblings' lives hung in the balance, and Natalia didn't yet know what was going to happen to them. No matter how many people insisted that Andy and Nik would be fine, Natalia couldn't shake the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her eyes were still red and puffy from when she had cried into Neville's arms, but Nat didn't feel like crying any more. She wanted to do something, but she couldn't. Even if this had been her department - and it wasn't - it was simple medical ethics that you couldn't work on your own family. But waiting...Waiting was awful. Waiting felt like dying. And even though she was exhausted in every way that a human being could possibly be exhausted, Natalia was terrified to sleep. She waited outside the door to Andromeda's room instead, curled against the wall as she watched people flit in and out, presumably to check on her sister.

What a way to start the year.

@lestrange

[Deleted]

Jan. 2nd

Andy had just told her family what she'd done. Well, everyone but Nik, but he already knew about most of it. She told them about attacking Nik first, then Desirae, then the muggles who had killed Susans father. All of it. She told them how her violin was used to attack those men, how she fought Desirae in that church, how she had tied her brother to a chair and stabbed him. She explained that it was her idea to kill their parents, that she changed her mind too late, that she regretted that they were dead. That more than anything else she regretted leaving Phil in the dark. That she loved him, but she didn't look at him.

She barely had looked at anyone. And now, she asked them to leave, calling the healers to escort them out if they tried to disagree. She sat on her bed now, bringing her knees up to her chest and bowing her head down to touch the tops of them. She didn't cry... yet.


@natalia

SPOILER: Click to show

Jan. 1st - Andy is passed out in recovery.

Jan 2nd - Andy tells the family all her exploits then kicks them out.

Jan 3rd - Andy won't see anyone. Her choice, not the healers.

Jan 4th - Andy will not speak to anyone but Phil, but she will let people visit.

Jan 5th - Andy will talk to a few people. Family, close friends.

Jan 6th- seemingly well.

Jan 7th - Natalia catches Andy breaking into her IV to try and down the entire pain killing potion.

Jan 8th - Andy is transferred to the psych ward in a room with no possible sharp objects, is not allowed to see anyone. If you go outside her room you just here normal sounds, healers and nurses trying to talk to her etc.

Jan 9th-11th - allowed to see family only but she refuses to see anyone other than Neville. Not even Phil or Nat.

Jan 12th - finally allows Nat in.

Jan 13th - allows Phil to visit.

Jan 14th - Jan 16th - a few good days. Visits and friends and family.

Jan 17th - healers don't let anyone in the room but screaming can be heard in the room through all hours of the day and night.

Jan 18th - no one allowed in, no sounds can be heard coming from the room.

Jan 19th - Jan 20th - healers ok one person visiting at a time accompanies by two orderlies. Andy seems strange, most eerily calm, never making eye contact.

Jan 21- another day no one allowed, just screaming and crying sounds can be heard.

Jan 22nd- family allowed, Andy wont speak

Jan 23rd - Jan 27th - this is where we will see the most improvement. Nat probably sleeps in the room during this time. Phil can lie next to Andy (like we talked about eaven) and be all adorable and crap.

Jan 28th - Andy is assessed by the healers WITH both Neville and Hannah to decide if she can go back to school, they basically decide yes but she has to check up with parvati, the hospital, and Caroline weekly. She also has to sleep in the hospital wing her first week at school to assure safety.

29th - Phil spends the day with Andy at mungos, telling her about the classes and gossip she missed blah blah. Phil only day

Jan 30th - stuff and things recovery. Getting ready to leave.

Jan. 31St - woo check out day!

[Deleted]

january 2, 2024

Andy had just told Natalia what she had done, and the elder Lestrange girl was once again riding a wave of emotions that she didn’t quite understand. The wave was quickly crashing to shore, though, and Natalia was almost relieved when Andromeda commanded that they all leave. She was relieved, because it meant that when she got outside and sat on the floor with her knees curled into her chest, she could pretend that her sadness was from being denied by her sister, and not from some ephemeral feeling that she had failed. Natalia knew that she couldn’t have done anything about it, since Andy hadn’t told her anything, but still, the Ravenclaw blamed herself for her sister’s insanity getting as bad as it had. If she hadn’t told Andy about their father’s letter, then she wouldn’t have gotten it in her head that their parents had to die. Natalia didn’t know if someone was trying to comfort her or not, but she didn’t need comfort. She just needed time. Time to process that her sister had been willing to become a murderer on her behalf, and she was left in the dark. Andy had said her greatest regret was not telling Phil anything, and once again, Natalia felt stupidly selfish, because it was her that Andromeda should have been apologizing to. Her biological parents were the ones that were dead, not Phil’s! And maybe she had hated them, but somewhere, deep down, Natalia was hoping that somehow justice would be served, and her father would wither away in Azkaban, his name forgotten to the world, rather than touted as the victim of a horrible, tragic accident, to be remembered forever. Tears stung at the backs of Natalia’s eyes, and she sighed softly before letting them fall.

@lestrange

[Deleted]

Jan. 2nd

For a moment, Andy regretted making everyone leave. She pushed off the bed, to standing, as if she was going to go to the door and open it and beg them all to come back. But she sat back down. Partly due to dizziness and partly due to being unable to complete her thought. To go and get them. They deserved better than her. They all did. Phil had never let her down, for years, neither had Neville or Hannah or Jayden. Even Alice had changed. And Natalia... she choked back a sob, trying her best to sit up straight due to fearing that if she bent over, the tears would just rush out of her until she was completely dry again. She scooted back onto the bed and brought her knees up to her chest, bowing her head down once more. Giving in.

She let the tears and the sobs come, horrible sounds that she didn't know she could make. "I'm sorry, Nat, I'm sorry. Nik," she choked again and more crying sounds came. No doubt the healers would be on her any moment...

@natalia
(there are gonna be a lot of gifs in this thread XD)

[Deleted]

january 2, 2024

Sitting outside Andromeda’s door, there was a lot that Natalia was not privy to. But there was one thing that the door couldn’t keep out, and that was noise. The moment the first choking noise came, Natalia was on her feet. It was instinct, at this point, to go to her sister when she was hurting. She wasn’t Phil, but maybe, she could be good enough. She could help, even if her own heart was just as torn as Andy’s was. She wouldn’t be let in, though, Natalia realized, and she sat back down, across from the door, absolutely numb. She was preparing to cry again, but was also trying to hold it together until after the sobs stopped from the other side of the door, but the moment she heard her name, Natalia couldn’t do it. She couldn’t be strong. She had thought that she had cried herself out already, but here was the apology that she had so desperately wanted, and it only made Nat feel worse. She didn’t want Andy to hurt. She never wanted Andy to hurt. Natalia’s own sobs began, in harmony with Andy’s. Healers rushed into Andy’s room to calm her, and still Natalia sat vigil outside, feeling her anger and jealousy begin to seep away with her tears.

@lestrange

[Deleted]

Jan 3rd - Andy won't see anyone. Her choice, not the healers.

Andy just kept crying the day before, but now the crying had stopped. For now. She asked the healers not to let anyone in. She didn't even want to see anyone when the door opened occasionally. She knew Natalia was out there, and that others were occasionally as well, but she didn't look at the door when it had to be opened. She sat on the edge of the bed, facing the wall opposite of the door.

She was facing several choices now. The biggest one... whether she was planning to go on living or not.

@natalia

[Deleted]

january 3, 2024

Natalia had been sitting outside of the door that morning, as she had the night previous after Andy had evicted their family from her hospital room. One of the nurses has told her that Andromeda had chosen not to see anyone, and oddly, it didn’t hurt as much as it had the previous day, to be shut out. It hadn’t hurt, at least, until one of the nurses had told her that she needed to move out of the door’s line of sight, because when Andy said she didn’t want to see anyone, she meant she didn’t want to see anyone, and if Andy happened to be turned around when the door opened, and saw Natalia waiting outside, that would be against her wishes. That had been tough. When Nat had stood to move down the hallway, though, she couldn’t manage to stop walking. She would be back, of course, but right that moment, she had needed to walk away.

@lestrange