|
Elijah Theron Fleming
ILVERMORNY ALUM MWRC APPRENTICE RESEARCHER
509 posts
Infatuated with Cordie Smith
played by Chanel
in too much space we hide.
|
|
last online Apr 11, 2024 16:28:40 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
|
|
|
Aug 15, 2018 18:05:25 GMT -7
Post by Elijah Theron Fleming on Aug 15, 2018 18:05:25 GMT -7
WHEN ELI LIFTED HIS HEAD TO FINALLY LOOK Ashley in the face, it was with the slow realisation that she'd been crying before. It only made what he had to say all the more important. Because he'd spent an awful lot of time thinking their entire connection was fake. That their friendship, their adventures, were all tainted by deception. But, time had also taught him something else.
"Yeah, I do." He said with conviction, allowing her tear tracks to go unmentioned. He didn't want her to second guess it, how she was feeling, or get embarrassed. Eli knew how that felt. The pumpkin rind pressed in to the meat of his palm. "I just-" He swallowed hard, brows wrinkling as he tried to find the appropriate words. "All this summer- everything that's happened, it made me realise that it doesn't really matter if it was fake."
To keep his face, Eli lifted his chin and watched a few students work silently a few floors up. "It was real to me." Eli squeezed his eyes shut, scrunching his face for a second. "I don't like your friends," He said in a rush, a small laugh bubbling from his throat. "But, I always liked you." Which was perhaps an understatement, but he was glad he said it. "And I still... don't understand exactly why you did it- why it happened." He said in reference to that awful day in the dining hall. "But... I just want things to be normal again." Reaching up, Eli scrubbed a hand over his face before peeking out between his fingers, shoulders rounded. "I just wanna be friends again."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
last online Apr 25, 2024 19:38:00 GMT -7
|
|
|
Aug 15, 2018 18:27:57 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2018 18:27:57 GMT -7
Ashley could hardly bring herself to really believe what Eli was saying. He wanted them to be friends again. Ashley didn't understand if he was just saying it in the heat of the moment, or because she was sitting there, crying in front of him. She didn't know what to think or feel, but it was like he lifted a huge weight off of her chest. He continued to speak, saying that it didn't matter if it was fake and Ash glanced away for a second. Nothing on her side had been fake ... but she didn't know if he'd believe her about that. She looked back up when he said it was real to him. Her mouth opened and she stared at him, hope finally starting to fill her as he explained that he liked her and he wanted things to go back to the way they were, even though he still didn't understand why she did what she did. The weight was back again. He wanted to be friends, but she couldn't. What she could do was try to explain herself. "I ... I know there's no good reason for what I did to you. That was," she paused, clearing her throat and blinking her eyes rapidly, looking down at the floor now. She couldn't face him with this confession. "wrong, but I can ... I was afraid." Ashley's voice was low, but she spoke loud enough Eli would be able to hear. "I ... for as long as I can remember I've been afraid of being alone. I think it started one day when I got lost while out somewhere with my family. I couldn't find them and actually ended up lost for more than an hour and ever since then the idea of being alone," she trembled, shaking her head as she decided she couldn't finish that sentence. "I was surprised. I didn't expect you to come to me in front of them and I panicked. I was worried that they wouldn't be my friends and that if something happened with you, I would be alone all summer. I wasn't ashamed of you, I just couldn't think clearly in that moment and my panic took over and everything happened so fast. I regretted it ever since." Ashley looked up at him slowly. "I let you down, which hurt more than being alone ever has, but," she paused, swallowing as she gathered her determination. "I can't be your friend anymore. I'm sorry, but I don't deserve you and I don't want to hurt you again. I ..." she looked away before rising to her feet, which was surprisingly easy. "I missed you," her voice was softer now as she glanced back down at him. "and I'm so glad you don't hate me anymore, but I can't." Ashley started walking back towards her bucket, surprised by how little she was slipping on the water. She could do this. She could hold on here until someone came to relieve her. Elijah Theron Fleming
|
|
|
|
|
Elijah Theron Fleming
ILVERMORNY ALUM MWRC APPRENTICE RESEARCHER
509 posts
Infatuated with Cordie Smith
played by Chanel
in too much space we hide.
|
|
last online Apr 11, 2024 16:28:40 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
|
|
|
Aug 15, 2018 18:45:22 GMT -7
Post by Elijah Theron Fleming on Aug 15, 2018 18:45:22 GMT -7
THOUGH THIS THOUGHT HADN'T COHERENTLY occurred to Eli until he said, when he did it struck him how true it was when he did. That despite everything, all he really wanted was that easy camaraderie. Secret little owl's and picking out gifts for her on holidays. How, even after everything he couldn't see certain things without his brain automatically thinking 'wow, I gotta show Ashley!' only to realise he had no right to any more.
Eli nodded silently as Ashley replied. She seemed to heart-wrenchingly sad that Eli missed the days when they could hug. When touching wasn't a weapon of mass destruction. He had to sit there, squeezing a pumpkin rind like a stress ball while she poured her heart out. He didn't interrupt her. But, suddenly he wished he had as he saw where it was beginning to go.
"No- Ashley..." Eli said, his eyes widening. "Look, people say stupid stuff all the time!" He tried to smile, but it was devoid if any true happiness. He reached for her, almost touching before he drew back. She was already so skittish. "I can't tell you how many times my own goddamn mouth screwed me..." It just so happened that when Ashley had done the same, it had been Eli being hurt, and he hadn't liked that. "I'm not... better than you, this isn't about deserving somebody-" But the door to the room swung open and a dull eyed student was rolling in.
Eli skittered across the ground as he attempted to stand with Ashley, a full half second too late to reach out for her. The student was already calling duty, and Eli knew he wasn't due off for at least another two hours. So that meant Ashley. "No- two minutes," Eli said, holding out a hand to halt the other student from interrupting. "You're not... protecting me, Ash." Eli spluttered, but the bubble was broken and he was suddenly unable to find his words. And her shift was over. Eli felt stupid and helpless.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
last online Apr 25, 2024 19:38:00 GMT -7
|
|
|
Aug 15, 2018 18:56:57 GMT -7
Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2018 18:56:57 GMT -7
Ashley could tell when he realized what she was saying, when the words registered to him. Eli looked stunned, almost as if he hadn't expected this. Really? Did he not know how her words taunted her? How their argument in the meadow on his birthday kept her from sleeping at night. She couldn't just let that go. He'd been so right about her, so right about everything and he was just so good. Too good to deserve someone who would almost surely hurt him again. He started to argue with her decision, telling her that people said dumb things all the time, that even he did. He said that he wasn't better than her and a sad smile graced her lips, despite how serious the situation was. She was about to speak when someone opened the door. They were here for her early. Eli told them to wait for a few minutes, turning to her. Ashley hesitated, but then reached out and softly touched his cheek, reveling in how nice it felt to touch him again. For the last time. "Eli, you are though. You are nice and accepting of everyone and just so good," she searched his eyes before moving her hand from his cheek and lowering her own gaze, "and I'm not. I don't want to hurt you again, even on accident. I honestly couldn't bear it, so I can't do this. I want to protect you ... from me." She bit her lip as the urge to cry came again, but refused to let the tears come by sheer force of will. "You're the best friend I ever had and I'm sorry for everything. Bye, Eli." With that, she turned and hurried away, letting the tears fall once she was far enough he wouldn't be able to see them. Elijah Theron Fleming (End Ashley)
|
|
|
|
|
Elijah Theron Fleming
ILVERMORNY ALUM MWRC APPRENTICE RESEARCHER
509 posts
Infatuated with Cordie Smith
played by Chanel
in too much space we hide.
|
|
last online Apr 11, 2024 16:28:40 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
|
|
|
Aug 15, 2018 19:09:22 GMT -7
Post by Elijah Theron Fleming on Aug 15, 2018 19:09:22 GMT -7
IT WAS LIKE WATCHING SOMETHING GO UP IN FLAMES right before his very eyes. Eli could only stand by, paralysed as Ashley looked at him with such finality. This was worse than the meadow, he thought. Because, at least then he had made up his mind. Now it was Ash, standing before him like a stranger. And then, just as she was almost gone, she turned to cradle his cheek.
Eli turned his face in to her touch, his cheek creasing as he furiously bit on the inside of his cheek. Maybe she had changed her mind. But, she hadn't. And all he wanted to do was tell her that he wasn't afraid of being hurt. That it was a fact of life, but he couldn't bring himself to. His eyes stung and he felt his cheeks burn. He didn't want to cry if she was just going to leave, but the salt nipped at the corners.
The cheek she touched felt miserably cold when she turned away and he was forced to watch her go. He took a panicked step forward when it was much too late, ready to reach for her when his foot crunched on something. He looked down with a frown, lifting the sole of his shoe to reveal a circle of silver. He bent down to pick it up, the fragile links folded over his hand. It was the charm bracelet he'd given Ashley for Christmas.
Eli didn't realise a tear had escaped until it dripped off the end of his chin and landed on the hand he held the bracelet with. He hadn't seen her wear it, but she must have had it on for it to be there. Had she left it for him? As a final goodbye. He didn't think so. The clasp was crushed, by his feet or otherwise he did not know. A voice called over Eli's shoulder. Was he okay? "Fine", he replied, standing and stuffing the metal in his pocket as he scrubbed the back of his wrist over his wet cheeks. So maybe there was a little bit of hope after all.
[END ELI]
|
|
|
|