the way way back | teddy

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

IN THE WAKE OF A LOSS, THE ELDERS OF BOTH the Weasleys and the Potters seemed to congregate. Albus found his childhood home filled to bursting. Whenever he tried to escape the surreal alternate reality he had stumbled upon, somebody would have their hands on him. Their tears dripping on the shoulder of his shirt and robes. He absolutely hated it. He hated mourning, he'd done it too many times before. Except this time, it was real. There was no going back.

Sporting a split lip and a black eye from a fight Albus had picked with a mouthy half-giant, he stood before his house but could not go in. The lights flickered and shadows stretched in the dimness, a full house once again. It made him feel cold all over and then suddenly hot. Work had been a bitch, he'd been pulled aside for being 'too aggressive' at training and after a pint too many at a pub on the way home Albus knew his time was up. He couldn't impose on Rosie for another night and he couldn't avoid going indoors.

He made it all the way to the front stoop before he heard what sounded like a wail from inside and he turned abruptly, parking himself heavily on the stairway and scrubbing at his face until it hurt. His breath was cold as it misted in front of him, a dramatic drop in temperature for the warming months. He didn't want summer to come, he welcomed the cold. Hands in his hair, he dropped his chin and tried to psyche himself up. He could make small-talk, say sorry a couple of times and then slip upstairs with some green ale. And then, as if sensing his cowardice, the doorway behind him opened and Albus flinched.

"I was just-" He turned, expecting his mum, or worse - his dad, standing in the doorway. It was neither, in fact it was a face Albus hadn't seen in a while. He folded his hands in to his robe sleeves and cleared his throat. "Teddy..." As if he were surprised to see him. Who would have thought this was the same kid who spent more time at his house, sharing his bedroom, more times than when he was at home. The prodigal god-son. They were older now, and Teddy was his own man. One Albus didn't really recognise. "I didn't know you were here." He said it lowly, like an apology. As if maybe, if he'd known he was inside, he might have made it to the top step. 

@edward

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[Deleted]

Albus Severus Potter

it still didn't feel real. the events of the last few days still didn't feel like they'd actually happened and if teddy closed his eyes for long enough he could almost swear that he was waking up from a horrible dream each time. it took a few moments each morning for the memory of what the community was feeling to kick in. the potter house had always been a safe place while he'd been growing up. it was a place he'd spent as much time at as his own house and the family that lived within it had become his own. in the last few years it had been more of a beacon of grief rather than a stronghold of memory and safe feelings. first it had been ginny and her terrible loss, then it had been the death of his godfather, the man who was the closest thing to an actual father he'd ever had and now the death of hermione, who granted teddy hadn't spent as much time with but she was someone he'd loved and would mourn.

it was where he was currently, sitting around the table with members of the weasley family, listening to them mourn their loss and also the loss felt by many others. one hundred people had been killed that night and each of them had meant something to someone. he'd been there, he'd seen it and there weren't many times that teddy had felt totally helpless in his life but that had been one of them. he'd never be able to shake the feeling that he could have done more, should have done more or that there could have been something done that might have stopped it. but he'd never know, there would never be any closure to those thoughts, just the hope that they would one day gradually fade into the background, only to be thought about in the last moments of a day.

he stood from the table, excused himself and walked towards the front door. he needed some air, the chance to sit and breathe before he could think of anymore words to say that would hold meaning other than small talk. he pushed his hand through his hair as he pulled open the door, a little a taken back when he saw albus sitting on the stairs. there was surprise in his voice, not surprising really, and teddy let the door close softly behind him, stepping forward so he could sit on the stoop next to albus. "well how could you, you haven't been inside yet." he said as he rested his elbows on his knee's, blowing into his hands and relishing the cool breeze that hit the back of his neck. he glanced at albus, taking in the face that he hadn't seen in what seemed like too long. "how's the other guy look?" teddy said, raising his finger to motion to the black eye that al was currently sporting.

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

HALFWAY SITTING AND STANDING, ALBUS FELT as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't. He thudded back on to the stone step, unable to make himself pretend to be in motion. Teddy's calm composure made him feel a little better, though. He huffed a laugh, two hands coming up to wrestle with his unruly dark hair. His knuckles were bruised, and he looked at them mottled skin as he brought both hands back in to his lap. Thinking absently about the salve he had inside, and should probably use before his mum caught sight of the mess of him.

From the corner of his eye, he watched Teddy settle down beside him. Blowing air in to his chilled, exposed hands. Good hands, Albus thought. Not bruised like his own. "I am gonna go inside..." Albus tried to defend himself, but it sounded weak in his mouth. But, Teddy didn't make him feel like he needed to explain any further. He hunched in on himself anyways, smiling ruefully at his old friends casual retort. "Can't remember." He drawled, his eyes tired as he turned with a thin smile. "Worse, I hope." But, the truth was, Albus didn't care at all. He hadn't fought to win. 

@edward

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[Deleted]

Albus Severus Potter

teddy took in the silence as he sat down. there were voices inside but they were drowned out by the nothingness of the outside world. when bad things happened, silence was at it's loudest. that's what teddy had always found. when he'd been told that harry had been missing, when he an vic had broken up and now that hermione had been killed, it was the loudest it had ever been. as he settled next to albus, teddy heard his voice break the silence and he let one shoulder shrug a little. he knew that people handled loss differently. that each loss was felt differently and albus had has a lot of loss in the last while. first his dad, then his mother's memory and now his aunt hermione. there had probably been people in the attacks on the students after the tri wizard tournament but teddy was a little ashamed to admit that he didn't know if there had been people al had lost in that but it was enough. "does anyone say you have to?" he asked quietly as he turned his head so he could fully look at al.

teddy knew what it was like to not want to be around people. when everything had first happened, when he'd lost harry and vic in a matter of weeks he'd drawn into himself, pulled back from the people he'd loved more than a little and found solace in the bottom of a bottle. so much so that he was still doing it. it had taken the death of someone else he loved to bring him back to the potter home, a home that in years previous had been just as much home as the house he'd grown up in. he chuckled lightly when albus said he hoped the other guy looked worse and he nodded a little. "that's the main thing." he said as he rubbed his hand together again. "just so long as you didn't come off second best." he heard voices coming from inside but he didn't think albus was quite ready to face people at the moment so he stood up. tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "come on, lets take a walk. i'm freezing just sitting here." he said as he motioned his shoulder back down the path. "give you time to think about explaining that face to everyone."

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

THE QUIET UNDERSTANDING IN TEDDY'S REPLY made Albus feel dizzy. His chest aching like a brand new bruise. He couldn't look at him friend then, chin dropping against his chest as if in shame. "They'll know if I don't." He said quietly, risking a look to his left as he watched Teddy's face for judgement. He found none, but Albus sort of wished there was. It would feel less like pity, that way. "I don't want them to think I don't care." This was said thickly, as if to a ghost in the dark. He played with his hands in his lap guiltily.

With a hard snort, Albus rolled his eyes. That sounded exactly like something Teddy might say to a black eye and a busted lip. That's how they got in to trouble when they were younger, Al the every impressionable boy and Teddy as the quiet instigator. "Learned from the best," He replied, hiding a grin behind his hand, paired with a flinch as it pulled the cut there.

Gratefully, Albus rose to his feet with Teddy. He'd half expected him to drag him inside. But, then again, that wouldn't have been like him. Teddy spent enough time at the Potter house that Al had always thought he was running from something, or maybe the lack of something. He didn't know what it felt like to lose both parent's, but he wondered if a house felt the loss as much as Teddy did. Even if you didn't really know them to begin with. He thought his dad might understand, though. Legs aching as he walked, he tucked both hands in to his pockets, shoulders up around his ears as their breath mingled mistily in front of them. "You think of everything, huh?" Al said, almost sarcastic as his hands curled in to fists. "Maybe I'll just fix it." He shrugged, knowing that he wouldn't. 

@edward

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Albus Severus Potter

he couldn't argue. the people that were inside the house might think that albus didn't care but it wasn't the truth. teddy knew that much. as someone who grieved in a slightly similar way to al, he could understand. he liked his space to feel his feelings. he was lucky enough that he lived alone so when he needed to he could retreat to his house and try and deal. he could imagine it was harder for al still living at home when the space that should be safe for him was full of people who would want to talk to him. "they might. but if you need space you need space." he said, trying to reason.

he couldn't help but smile a little at albus' snort and he knew he'd done something to make him amused. it wasn't easy in times like these and some might not think it appropriate but there needed to be some moments of light, he'd learned that. if you take all those moments away you had nothing but dark and he'd seen nothing but dark. "i taught you well." if there was a troublemaker among them it was james but teddy had his moments too. he'd been the older influence, the one that for some reason could instigate things with al where james had failed to do so. he was ashamed to admit he'd thought that was a cool thing when he'd been younger.

when albus stood teddy started walking away from the house, knowing that he would catch up quickly enough. walking was one of those things that cleared the head and would hopefully save albus another deer in headlights moment if someone else opened the front door. he did curse himself in that moment for forgetting to put any sort of jacket on before he'd come outside, wearing nothing but jeans, sneakers and a shirt wasn't the smartest idea but he didn't think he'd freeze.

if it got too bad he could cast something to keep him warm but for now the cold was grounding. he blew hot air from his mouth into his hands as they walked, the steam escaping through the gaps in his fingers like steam from a train. "call it a hidden talent." he said as albus bit the comment to him. "but you won't." he said as he risked a glance at his friend. "if you need some distance from people al, you know you can come and stay with me for a while. right?" he said, the potters house had always been open to him and he hoped that al knew the door swung both ways.

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

SOMETIMES, AL FELT LIKE HE ALWAYS NEEDED space. A constant bubble of it, at arms length. He'd felt like that most of his life. Like he was suffocating under a mountain of siblings and cousins and aunts and uncles. It meant that, when somebody died, the colony swarmed to protect the nest. Al's breath felt short at the mere thought of the inside of his house. Instead of explaining this, he nodded stiffly and let the subject go. At least somebody got it. Even if he was only pretending to make Al feel better. It worked.

Smirking down to his hands, Al almost laughed at Teddy's easy banter. He'd always been good at that, diffusing a situation. One minute Albus was tense with concern and the next he was pinching his lips together to stop from laughing. Somehow, Al had been closer to Teddy than James. Maybe it was because his older brother was such a show off. Always flirting and shouting and embarrassing him. Teddy was quieter. He coaxed Al out of his shell slowly, and without making him feel stupid for needing coaxing in the first place.

"I won't." Al echoed his old friend, digging his hands in to his pockets until he felt the seam strain. His face reminded him that he was alive, why would he want to fix it? His mum would probably think of a reason, but until then he'd enjoy the sting as he tongued the cut on his lip. Turning with a frown, Albus caught the tale end of Teddy's offer and rejected it instinctively. "What- like stay over?" He asked awkwardly, pulling a hand free to tug at his bottom lip. "I couldn't." He muttered to himself, turning away. "Mum'd think I was avoiding her." He tried to play it off with a laugh. As if he hadn't spent most of the last week at Rosie's. 

@edward

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Albus Severus Potter

teddy's mouth turned up into something of a grin and he shook his head. "well there won't be pillow fights and popcorn." he said as he rolled his eyes a little to look across at albus. "think of it as an escape if you need it." he said as he rubbed his hands together again. the biting cold was helping him in that moment. it was helping him by keeping him in the moment, to keep him there with albus rather than heading back to the potter house and pouring another glass of firewhiskey to drink with the people that were still there, or even worse stopping him from going back to his own house so he could down the bottle on his own. it was what he felt like, it was how he wanted to cope with everything that had been going on but he knew he couldn't, not tonight. nop matter how much it spoke to him he needed to fight the urge so he could be there for the people he loved. the people he'd always called family.

he nodded a little though, happy to take albus's easy refusal of the offer. it wasn't the offer that was really the important thing, it was the fact that albus knew it was on the table. it had always been there for him as the potter house, somewhere he could escape to when he needed it. his home had been brilliant and he couldn't have imagined anyone but his grandmother raising him, but sometimes it had been too much and he'd still needed that extra place to go. "she probaby already knows. she knows this is hard." teddy said softly, not as a way to make albus feel bad but ginny wasn't naive, nor was she blind. she'd know that al didn't want to go home, even if he'd thought he'd done a good job at hiding it. "so tell me about training?" he said as his feet crunched on the snow beneath him. "you flunking or passing with flying colours?" he said with a slight grin.

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

ROLLING HIS EYES SKYWARD, AL SHOULD HAVE known Teddy would make him laugh. Taking the rejection on the chin and doubling it back with a better argument. "What, you won't braid my hair?" He asked with a lift of his brows, a snicker catching the back of his throat. But, Teddy had a point. An escape was good. He sort of had that already, Rosie's flat becoming his unofficial stopping point. But, sometimes it was awkward. She had Prince Brando. He didn't want to intrude, like some pathetic third wheel. Teddy's sounded like a healthy middle, but a thought occurred to him.

"Wait, you have an actual flat?" He asked, pulling his knees together and trapping his folded hands between them. "Like, you don't live in a tent or a hostel?" He was joking, of course, but Al had always saw Teddy as a sort of... lone rider. Never stagnant. Always moving. "Cause I mean, I'm not topping and tailing again." He was grinning now, staring in to the cold street ahead of them, though he was aware of Teddy in his peripheral vision. "You're legs are far too hairy now, mate." And then he palmed hair from his forehead and became serious all at once. "Thanks, though... really."

"I know..." He admitted after a moment, turning to watch Teddy's profile. The hard flex of his jaw and the sincerity in his expression. It made Albus feel sick. He'd always understood Albus, even when Al didn't understand himself. Or, so it felt. He'd needed that in that moment. Hadn't known he'd needed it, but he had. He turned away, clearing his throat and trying to regain his composure amid the hole in his gut.

"It's alright," He shrugged, blowing out a misty breath. "Typical."  Turning to catch Teddy's eye as he added arrogantly, "Reckon I could beat you in a fight now." Auror training involved a lot of spell work, but it also requited rigorous physical training. He puffed his chest and squared his jaw, a little smirk on his face, a different look from the grief stricken panic of before. "You know I don't fail, Teddy." He drawled, unfolding his hands from between his knees to flatten them on his thighs. "What about you?" Teddy never spoke about his job much, he had a Ministry position that required ridiculous secrecy. Sometimes... it annoyed Albus. 

@edward

NEVERLAND at ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0!

[Deleted]

Albus Severus Potter

teddy smirked as he leaned closer to study albus' hair for a few seconds. "i don't think it's long enough to braid, sorry." the rejection hadn't hurt him. it had been an offer if albus had needed it. he'd offer it to anyone he loved, though if he was being honest albus was up at the top of the list. he'd always connected better with albus than he had others. maybe it was because they were similar in some way or maybe it was because it always seemed like james had had lily and albus had needed someone. he didn't know the reasons, just how he felt. he raised a brow and looked at albus with somewhat of an incredulous look. "a tent or a hostel? no i kept it classy. it was a cardboard box till i found a place that wasn't falling apart." he hadn't really. he'd lived at his grandmothers until he'd saved up enough to move out.

"i think we're too tall for that now. plus i'm pretty sure your feet smell worse now than they did ten years ago." though he did look back on all the times he'd stayed at the potters house with fondness, by the time he was a teenager he'd graduated from top and tailing with albus to deciding to sleep on the floor when they'd both started filling out. he nodded a little as albus thanked him, his voice sincere. teddy clasped his hands together, rubbing his palms as he tried to keep the frostbite at bay and he stared at them for a second. "there's no shame in needing time on your own." he'd had to learn that lesson himself. like albus he coped by internalizing, doing his best to deal with things on his own so that other people didn't have to see his pain. he'd always felt that that he'd had to hide the way he felt, to be strong for his grandmother and then everyone else that he'd grown up to love.

teddy scoffed as albus claimed that he could beat him in a fight and he cocked an eyebrow and turned his gaze back to the young potter. "don't count on it squirt." he said with a bit of a smirk, though internally he did wonder. teddy was older and more experienced sure, but albust had grown and filled out a little since their days of wrestling each other to see who was stronger. the puffed chest and the confidence in his voice made him smile and he shook his head a little, before resting his chin on his hand. "how could i forget." he said with somewhat of a mock sigh. "if i told you, i'd have to spell you." he teased as he tilted his head to the side to look at albus. "so who is she?" teddy said casually as he looked from albus back down the path, curious to see if the younger man would take the bait.

[Albus Severus Potter]

don't speak too soon.

RUFFLING HIS MOP OF DARK HAIR, AL SNORTED a laugh at Teddy's quick retort. "Sounds like quitting talk to me." He teased, shaking his head softly as he turned to look back out on to the street below. Laughter creasing his eyes as Teddy kept up with him in good humour, Al couldn't decide whether it was sincere or if his friend just wanted to distract him from the heavy grief that layered the inside of the house behind them. "Ah..." He nodded his head, hiding a smile behind a wiping hand across his mouth. "My mistake."

Though he rocked with a shocked bray of laugher as he leaned over and stomped lightly on Teddy's foot he'd insulted, a step lower than his. "Shurrup..." He snorted, lowering his chin and shaking it. He felt instantly guilty for laughing, for enjoying this moments reprieve in a sea of cloying grief. He was avoiding it all, and Teddy's gentle assurance, so low behind his bent head that he almost didn't hear it, stung in the back of Al's eyes. "Mm," He hummed, he wasn't sure if he could bear to agree wholeheartedly. Sometimes, he felt like he was abandoning his family altogether.

With a tentative smile, Albus raised his head finally and appraised Teddy with a challenging look. "Suppose you'll just have to duel me someday." He muttered daringly. It was better this way, Albus decided. "Well, that's no fun." Albus replied, palming Teddy's face and shoving his forehead back delicately. It was an old dynamic, like two kids wrestling in the snow, reminiscent of many winters Teddy spent at the Potter household. It was this warm, familiar feeling that gave Albus the confidence to finally go back inside.

"I'm not answering that." He declared with a short laugh, tongue dashing out over his bottom lip. "If you can't tell me about your job..." He sniffed, shrugging one shoulder. "I'm not telling you about her." There wasn't really a 'her' he could mention. Daring not to even consider Rosie lest he curse the delicate reprieve her company provided. "I'm ready to go back inside." He said, offering a hand to help his friend to his feet. "Thanks..." He breathed, pulling him in to a brief embrace. "I've missed you, Teddy." And then he turned and climbed back up the stoop.

[END?]

@edward  
we could potentially end this here if you wanted? move on to something more recent for these two?

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