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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Nov 24, 2020 5:36:39 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Nov 24, 2020 5:36:39 GMT -7
24 April 2025 Something had gone terribly wrong. It had been a week since Jamie had staggered into Slug and Jigger’s after the full moon, looking more disoriented than Sienna had ever seen her. The concern had morphed into something very close to horror after the girls had determined that somehow Aware Wolf had affected Jamie differently this time. Instead of completing the full transformation back from wolf to human, Jamie had been left with lingering…side effects. Enhanced senses like during her transformation. She still hadn’t come back into work, since her new ability meant she needed to adjust and an apothecary didn’t smell great to a normal person, much less one who could smell everything… …which left Si alone to figure out what had gone wrong. Rhys was supposed to come in around the same time as Jamie, but Sienna had asked for another week and then promptly forgot about him. She’d tested the composition of the batch Jamie had taken, frantically scanned every bit of paper related to it, and had finally identified the pesky ingredient that had probably caused the change. Fluxweed. An unpredictable ingredient under the best of circumstances, considering its mutable properties, but it must have reacted badly to the octopus tentacles and powdered moonstone. It had been Si’s first time trying to add fluxweed to the potion – so thank Merlin it hadn’t been in the dose Rhys had taken – and she’d promptly crossed every iteration of a recipe with fluxweed out of her notes. It still didn’t help with the nightmare that Rhys might also walk in with some extreme change – the head of a wolf, maybe, or its fangs. It was such a shame too, because Sienna had been so excited at first to test the compatibility of fluxweed with Aware Wolf – it was already used in potions like Polyjuice because of its ability to facilitate a change from one body to another – and it also had healing properties, so she’d been hopeful it could help with the pain. But after these disastrous results, the search for the right healing ingredient would need to continue…hopefully without damaging Jamie any further. Figuring out what had happened didn’t mean the work was over, and Sienna was hunched over her desk scanning an old textbook for ideas on what to replace the fluxweed with. It was easy to see the exhaustion on her face and the bags under her eyes, but there just wasn’t enough time until the next full moon. And she still needed to see Rhys, a visit she was not looking forward to (when she explained how Jamie was feeling), without any idea of when he might stop by again. She finished the chapter and set the book aside, but doing so knocked some of her notes off the desk. As she kneeled on the floor to shuffle them together, she hit her head while reaching under the desk for a loose piece of parchment and began to curse in French. Maybe she could just stay down here for a little while – and ignore all the work still waiting for her up above. That seemed nice. rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Nov 25, 2020 0:12:17 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Nov 25, 2020 0:12:17 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Rhys walked with his hands in his jacket pockets as he normally did, taking his time and careful to avoid the crowds of people. Normally he would have come sooner but Sienna had requested he come at a later time, he hadn’t thought too much of it and it had given him time to clean up his notes and even add details he’d remembered after. It was now his third time trying out this potion for them and while his side effects had been more or less the same some of the effects had been a bit better namely at least some of his overloaded senses such as smell which at least helped him from becoming too nauseous. The sensitivity to light however, had remained much the same in his opinion though he would have to thank Sienna yet again for those pills, aspirin she called them. They were something muggles took, she had explained when he had asked more about them and he was surprised they worked as well as they did considering he was used to magic having a solution to most things.
Rhys entered the store and didn’t see anybody in the lobby or even behind the counter for that matter. He waited a minute or two wondering if the chime from the door had been heard but he knew the drill and he walked behind the counter and to the room they normally discussed his notes and experience. When he walked into the room he paused and saw Sienna sitting on the floor, almost looking defeated in a sense and she looked about as tired as he looked on a normal day from insomnia. He paused and took his hands out of his pockets. ”You alright?” Rhys moved forward slowly and extended a hand to help her up. He wondered what had her looking so exhausted and wondered if it was because of working on the potion, though he assumed Jamie would have been helping her. He would just ask another time.
Rhys also wanted to mention his nightmares again, they hadn’t gotten better and if anything this last time had been the worst he’d ever experienced them and thankfully Sienna had asked him to delay coming a week and he eventually was able to sleep after a couple of days. That and his light sensitivity and the usual transformation pain were his main notes, he hadn’t really noticed anything new aside from that. Rhys didn’t want to comment on how tired she looked but he knew the signs of exhaustion just from his own experience. ”Where’s Jamie?” Rhys had hoped he might have seen her this many days this time after the full moon versus when they both were usually resting.
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Nov 25, 2020 4:36:44 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Nov 25, 2020 4:36:44 GMT -7
Sienna sighed deeply as she remained seated on the floor, notes held loosely in her hands as she stared into space. Setbacks were normal when it came to potion experimentation, she knew that. She’d faced difficulties before in tweaking other recipes, and every time Sienna had eventually found a solution to make it work. But it was one thing to take something that already existed and improve its function, removing inefficiencies or simplifying the process. It was something else completely to start from scratch, knowing what you wanted the end result to look like but muddling through all the steps until you got there. Si had a shining image in her mind of what Aware Wolf could do, the condition it would help treat and a list of things it would improve over time. But this setback was…larger than most, and different from anything else she’d come across in the past. And she was running out of time until the next full moon. Rhys’s voice out-of-nowhere startled her, and Si jumped a little as her eyes slid back into focus and settled on Rhys, who was standing over her and had offered a hand to help her up. “Oh, Rhys, I didn’t…I didn’t realize you’d be coming in today,” Sienna said once the shock wore off and her pulse steadied back to normal. She accepted his hand cautiously, propelling herself up as she looked him over. After a week, Rhys looked tired but seemingly back to normal. At least, whatever normal looked like for him. He also seemed slightly troubled, like there was something weighing on his mind. Well, that look at least was completely normal around here – Si was going to get worry wrinkles if she wasn’t careful. Now that they were both standing, it was an almost automatic movement for her to return to her seat, where she’d be sitting opposite Rhys in their usual positions while they discussed the potion and its effect on him. Sienna absentmindedly deposited the notes she was still holding onto a precarious stack of parchment off to the side before hunting through the mess to find the notebook she’d started using to copy Rhys’s feelings journal into. This would be the third month of entries, so it was still fairly empty, but she liked to have it all in one place. But she froze when Rhys asked where Jamie was. It was a fair question, since they were now over a week after the full moon and it was by all means a normal work day. Jamie theoretically should be here, although it surprised Sienna that she hadn’t sent an owl or something to her brother. Si knew she’d have to talk about what had happened to Jamie at some point with Rhys to explain what her new normal would look like, but she might have secretly been hoping Jamie would have sent a note or something explaining first – get the shock and anger out of the way sooner. Clearly not. “Probably at home,” Si finally responded, twiddling with her fingers nervously. “Erm, this month Jamie took a different potion than you did. A slightly modified recipe. And…” Si trailed off nervously before deciding to just push through and get it all out. So the next words came out more rushed than the previous ones. “Well, she had a bad reaction. She’s okay, just…a little different.” rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Nov 25, 2020 11:36:33 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Nov 25, 2020 11:36:33 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Sienna seemed startled by his arrival though Rhys knew what that was like, getting so caught up in your work that you lost track of when and where you were. Though that certainly hadn’t been his intention to startle her. ”I didn’t mean to startle you, I’m sorry.” Rhys helped her up off the floor and picked up a few remaining pages she had left behind and placed them on her desk. Taking a cue from her as she sat in her normal seat, Rhys walked over and sat in his usual place and pulled out his journal and placed his journal on the desk in front of him. It maybe have only been the third time but it all seemed very routine now, and Rhys liked having some routine. It lessened the anxiety he had about anything but so did having a plan as well. However, he did notice her momentary pause when he asked about his sister and he was curious what that was about. Rhys was close to his siblings, but they didn’t talk every day by any means, they had their own lives and things to do so they talked when they could. And with this trial going on he didn’t discuss it much with Jamie so their results would be independent of on another.
She did finally answer him, and he looked at her with a mix of curiosity and a little impatience. Though it grew to a bit more of concert when she seemed hesitant to answer him. ”Wait—is she okay?” Rhys’ immediate concern was for her well-being especially being the first test subject in this trial. He also hadn’t realized that he’d stood up from his seat, not from a position of anger but more of concerned brother who needed to know his sister was okay. ”Why wouldn’t she tell me?” Well, it wasn’t farfetched of her either knowing how he reacted to things involving them—so maybe not a total surprise. ”What happened?” Rhys asked a bit calmer this time, he needed to know if she was okay and what had happened. After a second, he forced himself to take a breath and he sat back down. ”Sorry….” He muttered, also clearing his throat. He could forget that not everybody knew how he was like, he maybe have been serious most of the time but certain topics would always get a reaction from him.
He also hadn’t known that Jamie was taking a different potion than he was, maybe she was the true test subject in that sense while he was meant to confirm side effects and other things. It made sense but he worried, Jamie was putting herself at such risk for this—he knew it was for something good but it made him uncomfortable nonetheless.
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Nov 29, 2020 7:48:18 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Nov 29, 2020 7:48:18 GMT -7
Sienna didn’t function well when she was tired. She was used to pulling all-nighters when it was necessary for work, and she knew some people just had that unspeakable quality to be able to operate (and sometimes deliver their best work) late at night. But she’d never been like that. She was one of those seemingly unreal morning people – she liked to wake up early, when most of the world was still asleep and things were therefore much more peaceful, and do her best thinking then. Lately she’d been shifting her schedule later and later, staying more time at the apothecary to catch up on her workload and still find time for Aware Wolf, and it made her brain feel like it was moving through a thick jelly. She could usually function almost flawlessly in English, but when she was tired she reverted to thinking in French instead, and her accent seeped into conversations more often. And it meant she could be slow to react, which was the only reason she didn’t react more expressively to Rhys’s sudden burst of questions as he jumped up from his seat. Instead, Sienna just slumped in her chair as she wished that Rhys had come in another day, or that Jamie had sent an owl to her brother, or for the ability to just Disapparate and be anywhere except here. Since none of those things were possible, she exhaled slowly through her nose as her lips twisted into a frown. Rhys eventually seemed to calm down by himself as he realized he was standing over her and had rapidly fired off questions – some of which were unanswerable. He apologized and sunk back into his seat, and Si forced herself to straighten a little. “No, don’t apologize…it’s a very normal reaction, considering the circumstances,” Si mumbled. Where to start? Rhys had asked one easy question, one difficult question with a long answer, and one that Sienna didn’t want to touch with a ten-foot pole. Si didn’t have the faintest idea what kind of relationship Jamie had with Rhys, and what she would or would not tell her brother. The idea of admitting that to Rhys when he had already hinted at some complicated Greyback family dynamics sounded horrible, so Sienna tactfully pretended she hadn’t heard it. As for the other two… “She’s going to be okay,” Si repeated tiredly, although this time it was presented as a future state of being as opposed to anything Jamie was right now. “The first few months of testing, Jamie took a potion with the same recipe every time. The same potion you're taking now. But since we were able to establish a baseline for what to expect, I’ve been tweaking the recipe slightly for her to learn more about the potion’s composition. And to try and address additional symptoms…erm, like the pain of transforming.” That was something Si and Rhys had discussed a visit or two ago. Sienna twisted her hands nervously – it was difficult to discuss something so technical with someone who didn’t have a background in potions, since the explanation could either sound incomprehensible, confusing, or dangerous to someone who didn’t understand the process. “This time I added a new ingredient, and it seems to have reacted poorly to the existing brew. You’ve seen how some of the wolf’s senses can linger after the full moon and it…it seems to have had a permanent effect on Jamie. Her smell, her hearing…” It was the best she could do for a short explanation of what happened, and Si slouched in her chair again and resisted the urge to rub her eyes and risk ruining her makeup. It was also the only explanation she could give right now, since it had only happened a week ago and they'd therefore only done limited testing so far. Jamie would have a better idea of what her new condition would look like over time. “I’m sorry that it happened. Very, very sorry. I’m still trying to process what this means for the potion.” It had never occurred to Si to give up entirely on the project, but that still left many decisions to be made. How wise it would be to continue tweaking with a limited formula that had so far been proven to work, finding and avoiding other herbs that might react the same way the fluxweed had, and whether the right solution to avoiding another mistake was to keep the testing pool small or widen it. All of that came second, though, to this current conversation with Rhys, since he had to be concerned both as a brother and a test subject. Maybe if she’d had more time to go over the results, she’d be better prepared to discuss with him, but he was probably upset she’d already waited this long already. Si tapped her fingers on the armrest of her chair as she looked Rhys over. He’d taken the same recipe as last month, but still… “How are you feeling?” rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Nov 29, 2020 15:49:06 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Nov 29, 2020 15:49:06 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Rhys hadn’t meant to react as he had, but his concern had driven his response entirely. Sienna seemed surprised that he wasn’t aware of the situation and he wondered why Jamie would keep it from him, but then again she probably hadn’t wanted him to react as he had in that moment or demand that she stop taking the potion as he might have. Rhys never intended to be this extreme but after Elias he seemed to have gotten worse on worrying about their safety and what they were doing, and he couldn’t help it. There was something to be said about abandonment issues and holding on to those closest to you and the constant fear of them leaving or worrying that something would happen to them. Sienna reassured him that his sister was okay and explained to him how the potion she had tried had a different composition than the one she had been taking before which matched the formula that Rhys himself had been given. It seemed there was a base composition and then whatever was added or removed to help with individual symptoms it seemed.
He listened, trying to stay calm—he wasn’t mad more than he was nervous about it all really. The unknown gave him anxiety as much as the next person but again, this was different. Rhys furrowed his brow, he thought about the sensory overload he experienced the day after and being barely able to open his eyes for some time but now Jamie had that effect still lingering, permanent. It wasn’t the end of the world and she assured him she was physically fine otherwise, but he tried to think about what this would mean, how would it affect her life and everything. ”So—“ Rhys stopped, what does one say to this? ”So, all that sensory overload…..she now has permanently?” Rhys repeated what she had just said but just to clarify he had heard it correctly. ”But she’s okay otherwise?” Rhys’ mind had gone to dark places, had she transformed and gotten stuck like that, had she mauled someone or gotten physically injured otherwise. This didn’t seem that bad, but it wasn’t good either.
What did this mean for the potion? Though if he was angry at all it was only at his sister for volunteering as such an eager test subject but it wasn’t as if any of his siblings ever actually listened to him when he told them not to do something. Rhys let out a sigh, ”Well I suppose it could have been worse…” It was done, and him reacting wasn’t going to reverse it. Still, he looked back at Sienna—her blue eyes looked tired as ever. He wondered if this was his own eyes looked like at times, he was the only one of his siblings to have their father’s eyes—blue. He paused, normally he came in sooner when he was feeling worse after the full moon, but this month had been different tough he now knew why. ”About the same. Light sensitivity takes a few days to wear off.” He paused again, there was always a point he felt hesitant to bring up. He actually hadn’t been sleeping well at all this past week. ”Nightmares are still there.”
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Dec 4, 2020 7:33:43 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Dec 4, 2020 7:33:43 GMT -7
It seemed Rhys wasn’t done discussing Jamie’s new reality – which completely made sense from the point of view of someone who had just learned about it a few minutes ago. Especially with the added consideration that this was his sister they were discussing and yes, Si understood why he would repeat questions and seek confirmation that she was definitely going to be okay. But this had been the only topic of conversation for Sienna for over a week now, and she and Jamie had examined the issue from every potential dimension – details of Jamie’s day-to-day, implications for the potion, tweaking the environment to make it more palatable to her senses… But Sienna could keep her composure. She didn’t have any siblings but she could understand Rhys’s protective streak, so she nodded again. “Right now, it does seem to be overwhelming for her, but there’s already been a lot of improvement since it began,” Sienna mused out-loud, recapping some of their observations on a day-to-day basis. “I think with time,” Si continued in as gentle a tone as she could muster, “it will just…become a part of her. Maybe to the point where it becomes more helpful than harmful.” That was the hope, at any rate. Sienna had gone to visit Jamie yesterday after closing up the apothecary, and even without wearing her usual perfume Jamie had known (smelled?) that she was on her way before Si had knocked on the door. But the lights seemed to bother her less, and Si had gotten much closer to her than on previous days. So she could still hold out hope that someday Jamie could learn how to live with the extra senses. As Rhys described his symptoms, Sienna dropped eye contact so she could weakly scribble out some notes about the light sensitivity that continued to bother him. The idea of taking thorough notes exhausted her, so she settled for simply scratching out a few phrases to remember later. But, she put down the quill so she could take a better look at Rhys when he mentioned the nightmares again. She hesitated as she debated a few different ways to put it, before observing out-loud, “You mention the nightmares every time.” Upon closer examination, Si could pick out the signs that he also looked exhausted – probably identical to how she looked right now. “Maybe…it’s time to talk about them,” Sienna suggested tentatively before continuing, “sometimes things become clearer when they’re brought into the light.” rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Dec 5, 2020 1:42:18 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Dec 5, 2020 1:42:18 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Rhys nodded. Jamie was okay—she was going to be okay. His earlier outburst was probably unnecessary, but it had just been a reaction. It had been something that had come naturally for him when he had met his siblings but more from the perspective of, he had something so precious and special to him and Merlin forbid anything happened that took it away from him. It was a little bit selfish, but he couldn’t help it. Though the more time passed by him learned more about being an older sibling. He couldn’t imagine what it was like to have the side effects, but they never quite left and stayed very strong, it was beneficial in small ways but over all it did follow the mantra that “too much of a good thing is a bad thing.” He’d make a note to write her when he left and arrange a visit, he didn’t want to make it worse by just barging in.
There was a pause on Sienna’s end and Rhys looked up and saw her looking at him with a different expression on her face. It made him regret bringing it up but with their intensity he couldn’t help but say something. At her suggestion he sat up a bit more in his chair in a way a child might fidget in their chair. It was certainly a first, aside from the fact that little to nobody knew about them really and now he was being asked to reveal their contents. ”Um—I’ve—um…” He paused quickly to find the right words. ”I’ve never really told anyone about them before.” He felt incredibly hesitant and he crossed his arms tightly and stared at a corner of the room wondering if he should push back? Should he just jump right in? Where did he start? If he was even going to start. Rhys wasn’t sure how long he was silent for, but long enough that he felt his jaw had been clenched for more than a moment. He exhaled heavily through his nose.
He didn’t hesitate because he didn’t trust Sienna, so far, he hadn’t felt the need to be so serious and guarded after all these months interacting plus Jamie trusted her. ”Before I tell you, I need you to promise me something.” He spoken in an event tone still staring off into the room. Again, he paused, though only for a quick moment before looking back at Sienna. ”You can’t tell Jamie, or Max or Adrian. Anybody.” The ‘anybody’ was probably unnecessary. Rhys stopped again, the topic was clear, but he never could quite get a handle on how to explain it properly. ”What they know is that Fenrir, our father, killed my mother when I was five and then he turned me.” Rhys paused, he skipped ahead and left out the part where while Fenrir did have consensual relationships the one with his own mother was anything but. Rhys uncrossed his arms and learned forward so his elbows were on his knees and his hands clasped together in front of him.
”I never told them I saw everything.” He swallowed, the feeling of a lump in his throat. He closed his eyes as if he were concentrating. His voice was still even, but not strong. It had all happened right in front of his eyes, including the deaths of the neighbors who had take him in a week later. So much blood shed just because he existed. Rhys took a deep breath and opened his eyes, but still stared at the floor. ”I started having nightmares as a boy. And someone thought it would be a good idea to let me relive them using a Pensieve.” That had been when they had really begun, the ‘nightmares’ before that were nothing to compared to this terror. Rhys didn’t want to look at Sienna, he knew he’d just unloaded quite a bit of information, but he trusted her, he knew that trust had come with time but also with how honest she had just been about what happened with Jamie. And she’d kept his nightmares secret as promised before.
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Dec 13, 2020 5:25:29 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Dec 13, 2020 5:25:29 GMT -7
The two had been tiptoeing around the subject of Rhys’s nightmares for months. The first couple times he had mentioned them, Rhys had clearly been reluctant to say anything more – and Sienna had agreed with the sentiment enough not to push. They’d just met, after all, and Si could be visibly skittish around people she didn’t know and therefore couldn’t trust. So he hadn’t wanted to talk about it, and Si hadn’t felt comfortable enough to ask. That had been the pattern for a while, but at this point it had been…what, 5 months since this partnership of sorts had started? Rhys knew the drill regarding Aware Wolf and they’d started to talk about other things too besides the potion. So with the knowledge that they were slowly becoming friends – and that Sienna knew an embarrassingly large number of things about him because of the questionnaire he’d had to fill out – she finally felt they were in a good enough place for her to ask. And at least, to promise not to tell Jamie (because again, complicated Greyback family dynamics that Si was very uninterested in messing with). As much as Rhys hesitated before asking her not to share with Jamie or his other siblings, Sienna hesitated a moment before nodding. “It’s not my place to tell,” she affirmed out-loud – she wasn’t his psychologist or anything, but they had a confidentiality of sorts because of Aware Wolf. That seemed like a good enough reason to keep things between them. She listened intently, mouth in a straight line, as Rhys explained first what all the siblings knew about their father. She’d lost her own mother at a young age – Sienna didn’t even remember anything about her – but Si had always known she could rely on her father and grandparents for love and support. She’d never even given that a second thought. So it was hard to listen to such a tragic (since tragic had to be the right word here) backstory, but especially the casual tone Rhys used to describe it. She didn’t even realize she’d practically been holding her breath until Rhys finished – his mother’s death, that he’d witnessed it, and reliving the memories with a Pensieve. He wasn’t crying, so Sienna didn’t move to grab the pack of tissues she had stashed in her desk. “That’s inexcusable,” Si finally said, and she even surprised herself with the amount of venom in her voice. “What your father did, but also whoever thought you needed to see it again.” Her face was hard with anger, so she forced herself to relax it and looked Rhys over. He wasn’t looking at her – and Si couldn’t blame him for that – but she gingerly reached across the table to place a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry. You deserve…so much better,” she said after a moment of silence. It seemed like something pitifully small to say after such a heavy secret, but it seemed like Rhys hadn’t shared this with many people so she wasn’t sure if anyone had told him that before. She continued after a moment. “Do you have a picture of her?” she asked, keeping her tone soft because it was the only way not to become indignantly angry on his behalf. rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Dec 13, 2020 13:35:22 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Dec 13, 2020 13:35:22 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Considering the nature of the work and how their friendship started Rhys had grown to trust Sienna pretty quickly. They were testing potions after all and especially with how upfront she had been about the incident with Jamie, well he hadn’t been given any reason to doubt her. It was in his nature to be suspicious and skeptical of people, he’d had too many experiences of not having his guard up and being hurt for it but as it was the case with his siblings and very closest friends it was possible to drop it or not have it up at all. By the time he’d met Max he’d learned to not instinctively have his guards up at least with them. Plus, due to the nature of the testing Sienna knew a lot more personal things about him than a lot of people would ever know so there was an implicit level of trust between them. And really, she was a nice girl and Rhys got along with her.
She affirmed that this information would be kept between them, but he still felt uneasy, he hated seeing the look in people’s eyes and faces when he said certain things and the pity. Pity didn’t do him any good when it came to his life, he just pushed through it all and hoped he came out the other end in some decent state. He still felt the lump in his throat after he finished explaining what it was all about at a high level to Sienna, he didn’t look at her not wanting to see the pain his retelling tended to cause other people even though it hadn’t happened to them. The part about the pensieve was really the said part about the whole story for Rhys, he could have gone his entire life with some basic childhood nightmares that would have probably gone away as he reached his teen years but instead, he had this fear of what would haunt him the second he closed his eyes.
Her response wasn’t exactly what he expected, though he had assumptions he never knew what to expect but she seemed more horrified about the pensieve part than the actual act of his mother dying itself. His eyes were intently focused on some other part of the room, but he looked back at her when she touched his arm. He really wasn’t sure how to respond, or what to say to her—she was being genuine. He always wondered what Max or Jamie would have to say about it all if he’d ever told them. ”I—um…..yea I do.” Rhys cleared his throat, he was still pushing down emotions he had at bay almost all the time. From the inside of his jacket, he pulled out a small wallet and slowly searched for the picture he was looking for. There were pictures form his school days and with his siblings, including one with Elias the previous year and then he stopped when he found it.
Rhys stared at it for a few moments, she had been a beautiful woman. A big, happy smile and Rhys could faintly recall a contagious laugh. Her hair was long and had curls, like Rhys’ hair when he grew it out. One could say he did resemble her, minus the eyes. He had his father’s eyes. ”If it wasn’t for pictures and the nightmares, I probably wouldn’t even remember what she looked like now.” Maybe it was concussions from work or the heavy drinking, but his memory of that time wasn’t what it used to be. He spoke softly and handed the picture to Sienna. ”Jamie…all of them. They still have families.” He added, looking at the other photos he carried with him. ”I didn’t have anyone until I met Jamie.”
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Dec 14, 2020 6:28:28 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Dec 14, 2020 6:28:28 GMT -7
While Rhys pulled out a picture of his mother from his wallet, Sienna navigated her chair around her desk so she could sit closer to Rhys. While the two discussed Aware Wolf, Si liked having the desk as a barrier – if only to reinforce the professional tone of their meetings. The line between Aware Wolf and personal topics had started to blur after a few months, but now at least it seemed appropriate to sit together the way friends would as opposed to a researcher and one of her subjects. It also gave her a better vantage point to look over Rhys’s picture. He resembled his mother so much that it was easy to identify her features on his face. “She had a beautiful smile,” Sienna said with a slight admiring tone as her eyes scanned over the picture. She was glad she’d had the opportunity to say something, because – because Rhys’s next words knocked the wind out of her, and her breath hitched in her throat as she thought about the power of memory. And how devastating it was to not even have that. “I know what you mean,” Sienna managed, although her voice broke on the last word slightly. In a detached way, sometimes it felt odd to feel so strongly about someone she’d never even really known, but it was impossible to think about her mother in a detached way. Especially not when her ghost had always lingered in her life (although in a less literal way than wizards might expect). In some ways, it almost felt like Sienna knew her. Every time her father commented that, while Si had taken after him in appearance, that her personality was completely her mother’s – that was when she wondered what small thing had made him take notice. Or the sheer amount of pictures of her that were scattered around the house, or the way her side of the bed and closet had gone untouched for decades. It didn’t seem right to say something so emotionally loaded without elaborating, so Sienna reached for the picture of her father that she had on her desk (which she'd magically enchanted to move herself). She turned the photo to remove its frame, then removed a small folded-up photograph from the back. This one she kept secret, if only because it was clearly a Muggle photograph and Sienna was worried about people noticing. And because she didn’t want to admit she thought about her mother so often. The glossy paper was starting to fade from the amount of times Si had unfolded and refolded it to look, and it featured a young woman and her baby (which, although most babies were usually featureless, clearly had to be Sienna). She took more after her father, although there were hints of resemblance to her mother around the eyes and cheekbones. “I wish I could remember something. Her face, or her perfume, or something,” Si said bitterly, and she could feel the hot tears of frustration well up in the corners of her eyes. She blinked rapidly to fight them back. “But she died when I was two. So I just have this.” She hesitated as she traced a finger over her mother’s face. She’d harbored a suspicion for years, a seed of doubt (and maybe resentment) that she’d never told anyone – none of her magical friends, not even Gus, and certainly never her father who seemed haunted enough. She’d first thought of it at Beauxbatons, when they’d learned about the killing curse and Voldemort and his ideology. And then she’d gone home and interrogated her father and visited the local police precinct. So she was almost sure, even if she was afraid of saying it out-loud. But she forced herself to anyway. “It must have been the killing curse. A bit of Muggle-hunting for fun,” she said in a quiet, shaky voice. She finally gave up on keeping her hands away from her eyes and lightly brushed tears away before they could fall. Si could understand Rhys’s impulse to break eye contact, but she fixed him with an intent gaze. “I’m glad you found Jamie,” she said sincerely, even though her voice was still thick with the effort of keeping back tears. “Although now I can’t decide if it’s better not to be able to escape your memories, or not to have them at all.” rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Dec 14, 2020 18:25:10 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Dec 14, 2020 18:25:10 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
She moved her chair closer to him, but he didn’t mind it, really it only bothered him if you entered his personal space without some kind of implicit permission. He supposed it wasn’t a bad thing that he looked like his mother, he’d only seen vague photographs of his father and that beastly face he saw in his nightmares, so he really didn’t know what he looked like aside from his blue eyes. It was interesting, unless you put him and all his siblings net to one another you would never know they were siblings, the similarities you could only really see side by side as he noted in the picture, he had of all of them in his living room. But on the other side of it he never had that much with his mother, but he had to remember that every time he looked in the mirror. Rhys smile softly and nodded, that she did. The picture showed a young woman so full of life and smiling despite what she had been through up to that point. Rhys figured he might have been a baby or at least a toddler when she took this picture though he wasn’t in this one. He knew he had one when he was about four somewhere.
She commented that she knew what he meant and immediately he looked up at her, it wasn’t what he had expected as a response let alone with that emotion behind it. Sienna began to remove a photograph from a frame, and he realized she was reaching for something behind the main photograph. It wasn’t a magical one as it wasn’t moving, and she stared at it but held it so Rhys could see it as well. It was a woman holding a baby and he assumed that must have been Sienna. So, she had lost her mother as well? It made him sad to think that someone else knew that pain that he felt and that void. ”I’m sorry you know what it feels like.” It wasn’t something that one could explain as much as one wished there was a way to put it into words but at the same time, he didn’t wish this on anybody. But then with some hesitation she continued to speak, and Rhys felt a bit shocked. Even with their age difference they were both products of a war in the past one way or another.
He opened his mouth to speak but paused, losing one’s parent was painful but at least Rhys knew what had happened to his. ”That’s awful, I’m sorry.” The war in the books had an end date but it never really did end, did it? Pureblood supremacy was still a topic and individuals much like himself (a werewolf) and Sienna (muggle-born) still had discrimination against them. They had to work that much harder for their world to accept them. She looked at him with her own blue eyes, but when she spoke, he looked away. He supposed it was a blessing and a curse, he could see and hear his mother quite vividly but only because his dreams of that horrific night played over in his mind but what would it feel like to only have a photograph? And that was it. ”It depends on your perspective. I would rather only have a photograph than to see what I see when I dream.” Rhys admitted, he hoped it wasn’t insensitive, but it was the truth. ”I’m glad Jamie and all them have their mothers and their families. Its why I never told them because I knew they wouldn’t understand.” It wasn’t their fault, and he wasn’t resentful of them but only slightly jealous of what they’d had that he didn’t.
Rhys looked at the photograph she had again and thought about the ones he kept close to him. How many of those photographs would only be photographs one day? What if something happened to another sibling or someone he cared about. He took a deep breath, ”People don’t understand what its like to lose someone like that, though you hope they never have to. When Elias—“ He stopped and looked down fighting all the emotions that were currently forming a lump in his throat. It had been painful for all of them, especially Jamie and Max but he could never put into words what it had felt like to lose someone you’d basically just met. There had always been this void he’d been trying to fill so when something was taken away it just hurt an existing wound that had never healed in the first place and probably never would.
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Dec 16, 2020 12:29:37 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Dec 16, 2020 12:29:37 GMT -7
Sometimes the danger of the world they lived in felt so real, and other times it was so far away. Sienna knew there must be so much going on behind the scenes that she didn’t know about, and to be honest she didn’t want to know. It was difficult enough on the soul to read the Daily Prophet and scan the obituaries for muggleborns, or read about the most horrific attacks. Sometimes there were historical pieces too, reminders of the war that had been fought and the many ways their society was only just beginning to heal. It made her question some of the wonder and excitement she’d felt when she first got that letter from Beauxbatons. As a first-year, she had seen nothing but the beautiful things about the wizarding world – the magic at their fingertips, the magical creatures (fairies and unicorns and phoenixes), and all the ways their society resembled Muggle life and all the amazing ways it was different. But the older she got, the more she began to see the ugly things – the prejudices against certain groups, old-fashioned ideologies, and the devastating truth of her mother’s death (truth was a strong word – it was a suspicion and Si would never get anything more than that). Once you were invited in, there was no real way to ever let all of this go, and she didn’t want to anyway. But the truth was a heavy thing to live with, and so was the fear. Si blinked rapidly to hold back the tears – partly because it felt too vulnerable to cry in front of Rhys over something that happened so long ago, and partly because she was too scandalized at the thought of ruining her makeup. Instead, she settled for using her fingers to gingerly brush away the hot pricks of emotion at the corners of her eyes. Rhys admitted that he would prefer to only have the photographs, and not the memories. Si pinched her lips to keep everything inside, mostly because pain was pain and needed to be shared. And everybody experienced pain differently, so there was no real way to determine what was ‘right.’ Still, she shook her head slightly at Rhys’s reasoning on why he had never shared with Jamie and their other siblings. “Having empathy isn’t about going through the exact same experiences as somebody in order to understand them. You can still feel their pain anyway, and them with yours, because…because it’s about your relationship with them. Their love…validates you, and everything you’ve been through.” Her voice was thick with holding back tears, but she believed completely in what she said. “It’s different,” she conceded, “when you have that shared experience with someone else. But they love you, Rhys. I know Jamie does, at least. So she’d want to help you carry the memories, instead of leaving you all by yourself to sink. Letting other people see what you're ashamed of is the only way to rise above it. It can be unsteady footing so high, but it's the only way to really live.” She had never shared her suspicions about her mother, so she knew what it was like to keep something to yourself in order to protect someone else. But she also knew how it felt to share that pain with others, to be seen and validated instead of feeling so alone. It was a tough pill to swallow for someone like her – Sienna was scared of sharing too much about her Muggle parents, because she was sure that would make her a target for some people. But she also knew that loving and being loved was the most important experience in life, and that could only be done by exposing yourself to the possibility of being hurt. She’d been trying to find the balance since she was 11. Rhys cut himself off as he mentioned Elias, and Si’s gaze shot between him and the floor. She’d read the story in the Prophet but also heard Jamie’s version. Elias was just one more example of the hidden dangers of the wizarding world, one more casualty in a war none of them could see. “If you keep the pain hidden away, you’ll never see how to move forward,” Si said softly. “You have to confront your boggart to defeat it. But the right way.” rhys alexander greyback
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rhys alexander greyback
HOGWARTS ALUM WEREWOLF CURSEBREAKER ECHO
1,139 posts
played by vanessa
the air around me still feels like a cage
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last online Mar 28, 2024 17:59:21 GMT -7
WIZARDING ADULT
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Dec 17, 2020 22:58:20 GMT -7
Post by rhys alexander greyback on Dec 17, 2020 22:58:20 GMT -7
im caught in the twisting of the vine
April 24, 2025 Sienna Aurélie Linslee
Wizards and Witches came from all walks of life, Rhys had dealt with so many whether it was a child or during school. Children who either regarded him as a someone lower than them because of his name, he was a halfblood and a werewolf. Then again it hadn’t been specific to any single group, he found. Some Purebloods had looked down on him but so had some half-bloods like himself while others befriended him and could care less who’s son he was or that he was a werewolf. And there had been many muggleborn students who regarded him with a curiosity. They didn’t know who Fenrir Greyback was but were fascinated that he was a werewolf. But the real world was different from school and the war was over according to their History of Magic textbooks but not in all minds. Prejudice existed and would always exist, but Rhys was used to the world being an ugly place.
He could see she was upset, and that hadn’t been his intent though she had brought up the subject of her mother voluntarily. It only made him sad because there was a void when this occurred, and he felt it every day along with its weight and he wouldn’t wish it on any other soul. Her logic was sound, but it didn’t quite change his mind, he didn’t want to burden his siblings with his trauma—that didn’t seem fair. Rhys nodded slightly, ”Old habits…” Maybe it would have been easier if he had siblings closer to his own age. He’d been seventeen when Jamie came into his life and he didn’t regret it at all, but it had been a difficult transition at first. She had been so young and how did you tell an eleven-year-old that your own mother had been assaulted and then later killed. Well, you didn’t—so he had waited till they were older to elaborate but not to this level of detail. His jaw visibly clenches as he processed her words, but he was fighting his own stubbornness on this one.
He swallowed hard but paused, gaining some composure after being previously unable to complete his sentence. ”I wasn’t here when I died, I found out in a letter.” Rhys still had that letter, he’d wanted to burn it but hadn’t been able to. ”I should have come home but I threw myself into work instead.” It had been a grueling year trying to block out his emotional pain by replacing it with his own mental and physical exhaustion. Rhys already knew what Sienna was telling him but doing it was an entirely different thing. He took a deep breath and exhaled through his nose. ”I think they worry about me enough, with my work. I remember the looks on their faces when I got severely injured a couple years ago. I don’t need them to worry about me.”
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Sienna Aurélie Linslee
BEAUXBATONS ALUM POTIONS MASTERY POTIONEER SLUG AND JIGGERS ORDER OF MERLIN - SECOND CLASS
286 posts
played by Jenny
Who were you before the world told you who to be?
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last online Sept 30, 2023 5:12:39 GMT -7
STUDYING ABROAD
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Dec 26, 2020 8:24:44 GMT -7
Post by Sienna Aurélie Linslee on Dec 26, 2020 8:24:44 GMT -7
It was difficult to have a conversation this emotionally heavy on top of everything else. Sienna couldn’t believe that only two weeks ago, she’d been well-rested and going through her normal routine. Her life had been completely upended since Jamie had contacted her about the botched attempt at adding a new ingredient, and Si had been dealing with the fallout ever since. The worst part was that there wasn't really a definable end date – she’d isolated the troublesome change, but now her progress had been set back weeks, not to mention Jamie’s new and permanent condition. And the fact that the time until the next full moon was ticking down quickly and Sienna needed to have something concrete done by then. So she was more run-down than usual, which made it easier to push through some of the walls she’d put up around a subject as difficult as her mother or the challenges of being a muggleborn in magical society. But Si was also concerned about Rhys and his mental state – nothing of what he had shared was simple or easily forgotten, and it didn’t seem he had many confidants. Suggesting a therapist wasn’t really her place, and Sienna wouldn’t have tried even if they’d been friends for years, if only because one of the first things she’d learned about Rhys was his stubbornness and devotion to keeping troublesome topics under wraps. She still felt completely drained, and leaned back in her chair as Rhys told her about Elias. She’d heard plenty about Jamie’s siblings (at least the school-aged ones) from the girl herself, but she never talked much about Elias for good reason. Her near bout with tears left a small headache blossoming, but Si avoided the urge to rub her head as she gazed sadly at Rhys. “Different coping mechanisms, I suppose,” she murmured, although she didn’t want to interrupt the flow of his story. He didn’t seem to open up much, and she was afraid of spooking him right back into his shell. Once Si thought he’d reached a natural pause, she leaned forward in her chair again. “I think it’s safe to say they love you, Rhys, so they’ll always naturally worry about you. Especially with your career, like you’ve said.” Sienna paused and fiddled with her hair as she considered the messy situation he and his siblings had been put in, and she was practically perched on the edge of her chair now as she continued speaking. “You can be careful with how much you share, but I’m sure they notice when you keep things from them, or seem distant. So all you’re really accomplishing is that they’ll still worry, while not knowing about what. And they’ll think you’re battling this thing alone, which…” Si stopped to swallow as she considered the secrets she was keeping in her own life, “…which is hard to watch for people who love you. So…” she shrugged a bit as she searched for the right words. “You don’t have to share if you don’t want, but it’s a sign of trust when you do. And I know they’d want to help any way they could. If not by tackling the nightmares, then at least by letting you know that they’re there. And being able to talk about the things that haunt you, or that you’re ashamed of…if you choose the right people, I think could really help you. And I can't think of anybody who would understand more than your siblings.” rhys alexander greyback
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