midnight snacks and flipping photos -- neville

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

it wasn't often that jay couldn't sleep. he usually lived for sleep, counted down the seconds from when he got up in the morning to when he was able to fall back into the heaven that was bed. tonight had been different, at two in the morning and he was wide awake. he'd come home for the weekend with his father, needing to be away from the school for a few days. it had been a week since the phoenix group meeting and for some reason what had been said weighed on his mind. how someone could think that a person's life could be worth less than anothers, well that concept escaped him. he was sitting down in the lounge of the house, the fire going in front of him, a half empty bowl of chips beside him, an old thick blanket wrapped around his shoulders to keep the cool of the room off him as he sat flicking through a photo album he had found behind the bar. probably put there by either him or his siblings years ago, it had a nice layer of dust on the cover and the photo's inside weren't any that he had seen before. he sat with the book on his knee's, open to a page that had a picture of his mother holding a baby, probably alice or phil and some others of his parents and their friends and his fathers parents.

he let his attention drift for a moment as he glanced up from the book to watch the flames flickering. he always had been fascinated by fire, the way the flames moved, the colours danced and flicked against the wood that was slowly turning black from the heat. he wondered how his parents had done it, coped with the war that had been happening while they were his age, how they handled difficult issues. it seemed that all this group could do was point fingers and argue with one another. granted it was still a new thing, but he'd figured that everyone would be able to act almost their age for an hour. he rubbed the back of his neck and glanced down at the photo's in his lap and he pulled one out from the little cover it was in and held it up to the flames in order to see it better. it was the one of his mother and either one of his siblings. he couldn't work out which one, he'd ask her in the morning. shifting a little to rest his shoulder against the warm stone wall next to the fire, jay started to feel sleep trying to work it's way into his head. he yawned a little and pulled the blanket closer around his shoulders. after a few moments of watching the flames, he felt himself drift off to sleep, the picture still in his hand and the fire slowly dying out as the night went on.

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Neville traipsed in to the kitchen, stretching his arms out over his head. He’d gotten a couple hours’ sleep before waking back up to deal with the nocturnal plants in his greenhouses, and now that that was done, he wanted a nice hot drink before he headed back to bed. In the winter night, much of the house was rather cold, but he’d been in his greenhouse, where the temperature was more regulated. Normally, he would have taken his time and worked with his hands, but tonight he’d gardened by wand, rather than have to shower again to remove the sweat and grime he would have accumulated. Hannah Longbottom did not share her bed with filth. He was dressed in loose-fitting pants and his shoes, though he quickly removed these upon returning to the house and sent them flying off to the shoerack in the front hall. He pulled a bottle of Butterbeer from one of the kitchen cabinets—if there was an advantage to living over a pub, it was easy access to his favorite drink—and warmed it with a tap of his wand. He pulled the stopper and downed a generous portion of the slightly alcoholic drink. Butterbeer was weak enough that kids were permitted to drink it, and Neville had both size and tolerance on his side.

Taking the drink, he decided to move to sit and watch the fire for awhile. He liked watching fire—it always reminded him of himself and Hannah. Red and black coals beneath gold and yellow flickering flames, the intertwining colors of their houses. And as he walked into that room, what should he find but one of the products of that union? He smiled, looking at Jayden dozing next to the fireplace. It was surprising, though. Jayden could sleep through a tornado—he’d done so on at least two occasions, when magic in the pub got out of hand. And while he could sleep just about anywhere, he rarely did so outside of his nice warm bed. Hmm. How long had he been in here, looking at the photo album in his lap? Neville sat down in the two-seater couch that faced the fireplace, taking a moment to just look at his son. Jayden was more assertive and active than he’d been as a child—well, being fair, all his children were. But Jayden was probably the most social of his kids. Alice was the least, by far, but Jayden was more likely than Philip to take center stage, crack jokes, or lead a group…at least from what Neville could tell. On the other hand, Philip was almost exactly like him, and Neville had done some pretty out there things…so who knew?

He couldn’t leave Jayden just sitting there asleep. Not because it wasn’t his bed, but the way his head was leaning was straining his neck. If Neville let him sleep through the night, he’d be in a lot of unnecessary pain tomorrow. He considered picking Jayden up and carrying him to bed, but that probably wouldn’t work either. And…this behavior wasn’t normal. There was a reason he was out here, sleeping more fitfully than usual. Neville drank down his butterbeer while he thought about how to handle this. Finally, he raised his wand and pointed it at Jayden, silently using Ennervate to let him jolt himself back to consciousness, then flicked it at the kitchen to summon two more bottles to him. He caught them one-handed and smiled at his son. “You up, Jaybird? Not like you to be anywhere that’s not your bed when the sun is down.” He tapped the bottles, warming them up, and waved at his son to join him if he wanted.

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

"s'gonna eat me ...has to eat it first .. tater chip" jayden mumbled sleepily as he was roused from his sleep. feeling his head fall to the side jay jolted into a state of being almost awake and he blinked. his hand resting on the floor beside him to stop himself from just laying down and curling up on the floor. someone had woken him. blinking again he let the dimly lit room come into focus and he squinted a little to see his father sitting on the couch that was just across from him. why hadn't he thought of sleeping on that, for someone clever he wasn't all that bright he thought to himself. shifting a little he felt the family photo album slip from his lap and the photo that was still in his hand caught his attention. he looked at it for a second before his father's words cut into his world of 'still waking up' stupor. “You up, Jaybird? Not like you to be anywhere that’s not your bed when the sun is down.” he was more or less awake now. he reached up to rub the back of his aching neck while he gathered the album and photo into one hand and he smiled sleepily at his dad. "i think so. couldn't sleep" he clarified, using the wall behind him to stand up and then he made his way over to the couch to settle onto it next to his father.

he'd spent so much time on this old couch, curled up with either his mother or father begging them to tell them stories, curled up with a bowl of chips on his lap and reading his favourite books, being sent to the couch when he'd gotten into trouble for doing one thing or another and spending family time some nights with everyone together around the fire. he rubbed his fingers into his eyes and pulled his legs up under him as he shifted to lean against his father's shoulder. he figured since his father had woken him up he'd be allowed to use him as a pillow. "is this phil or alice" he said as he showed him the photo he'd had in his hands when he'd fallen asleep. "i was a lot smaller than that wasn't i?" he asked, fighting back a yawn as he still fought to wake up properly. he glanced back to the flames as he did, wondering if he should tell his dad why he'd been awake at that hour. he wasn't sure if he should, encase he gave anything away about what they were doing at the school, but he felt they needed some sort of expert opinion. they were only kids after all. he chewed his lip, kept his eyes on the flames and didn't look at his dad, just to be on the safe side. "what do you know about unforgivable curses?" he asked, wondering if his dad knew more than they all did.

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Neville managed not to laugh out loud at his son’s nonsense, but he couldn’t help the amused smile that crossed his face. When he was finally awake enough to realize who was here, he mentioned that he couldn’t sleep. That was a new one, from this particular Longbottom. He made his way up to the couch, not hesitating to lean on Neville’s shoulder, which only shifted the patriarch’s smile from amused to content. The time to let his children go was approaching far too quickly, so it was nice to know that they were still comfortable enough to be children around him. He let Jayden settle in and get comfortable against his shoulder, but kept himself situated in the center of the couch. He figured Hannah would come check on him when he didn’t come back to bed, especially knowing he would have finished quickly by doing everything with magic, and so he left room for her to curl up with them as well if she wanted.

Jayden held up a photo and asked him who it was. Neville lit the tip of his wand so he could see it better. “That’s Alice. See how the hair is gold? Phil was born with the Pureblood blonde hair, that almost-white color like the Malfoys have. His hair darkened over time, and he matched his mother and sister by the time he was two.” He smiled at the next question, remembering how Jayden had come early and how worried the healers were about his survival. But Neville had never doubted. No child of his and Hannah’s would be so easily brought down. And he’d been right. “You were tiny. Not that that stopped you. The way you’re going, you’ll catch up to your brother in a year. Heck, you might catch up to me.” Even setting that aside, Harry was a bit of a shrimp, relative to the rest of the Gryffindor boys, but that didn’t change the fact that he’d saved the world, or the fact that nobody could take him in a duel, friendly or otherwise. Out of those who’d trained with him and had friendly duels, Neville had probably come the closest, owing to his use of plants, but even that wasn’t enough. Now, war was a different thing altogether, and that was, sadly, where Neville really shined. Point being, size didn't mean much, being scrawny didn't mean much, if you were a fighter. And Jayden was most certainly a fighter.

Jayden’s next question was completely out of left field.

Neville blinked, trying to figure out why in the world his youngest would need to know about the Unforgivables. His mind raced, but he drew blanks. What on earth…? Well…he was certainly not going to refuse to answer the question, at any rate. Jayden was the fighter of his children, more willing than Phil or Alice to draw his wand on others, though he had no doubt all three of them could do it when push came to shove. He had expressed interest in being an Auror, so maybe… “More than I care to know, honestly. Certainly more than most people know. Especially the Cruciatus Curse. Don’t tell your sister, but there’s nobody in Britain who’s been subjected to the Cruciatus as much as I have.” Alice didn’t need to know that right now, not with the Lestrange girls being recent additions to their home. Alice wanted to treat them well, but that stubborn streak she’d gotten from Gran and her jealousy and resentment just made it so hard. He was proud that she was trying, and he really didn’t want to make it harder on her by letting her connect some of his darkest days to the same curse that destroyed her grandparents.

“Why do you ask?”

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

as he leaned against his fathers shoulder, jay leaned his head against him too. he didn't see the shame in it. there would never be a time when he wouldn't use his father for a leaning post. when he was thirty and if he was tired and his father was there, he'd lean on him. if he was ever upset and needed someone there he'd lean on his father. that's what neville had always been. a rock that his kids could lean on and jayden would be forever grateful that he had been born into the family he had, with the brother and sister that he had and especially the parents he had. he knew that his mother and father would never turn him away, no matter what he did. they'd be there for him. he knew so many people that didn't have that family support behind them. he treasured it. reaching behind him he gripped the blanket that lay over the back of the couch and pulled it around his shoulders, feeling like he was five again. he smiled a little as he looked at the fire, getting more comfortable and content by the second under the warmth of the blanket and the feeling of being safe with his father. he didn't need his father to be safe, he knew that. he was more than capable of defending himself, or so he was certain, but there was always something about being at home that would be safe. nothing bad could happen in this house. it just couldn't.

he glanced at the photo a little more, taking note of the hair. of course. he himself had been born with jet black hair according to his mother, something totally out of the ordinary for her family apparently. ah well, it had made him different. it hadn't taken long to turn blonde anyway, like phil. he smiled a little. "pity she didn't stay that cute and sweet" he said with a small grin. he was joking of course. he loved his sister now he was old enough to understand her a little better. though he had to admit he still remembered what it had felt like to be ignored by her as a child. the memories still hurt a little but he wasn't a bitter person. he didn't have a bone in his body that allowed him to be bitter. it just wasn't who he was. "i had a good reason for being tiny" he said with a smile as he flicked through the book that was still in his hands and found one of him and his dad when he was about two. "well i had to keep up with phil didn't it. i reckon i'll catch him before the year is out and you before i graduate." he said with a smile and without thinking he found himself curling up more against his father, the memories of being held in the photo's shining through now and taking over his tired and over thinking brain.

he knew he'd thrown his father a curve ball when he'd asked about the curses. but he'd been curious. there was so much going on at the school, so many people acting different that it wasn't something that he could ignore any more. he'd notice it. subtle things really, but they were there. the signs. the phoenix meeting had been a little like a warning he thought. carcer had almost lost it, albus had had a go at his brother and people were willing to let someone take the fall in order to save someone else. he hadn't known everyone in the room but the ones he had, well they had surprised him. "because of what happened to your parents? what bellatrix lestrange did to them? surely alice won't hold that against andy and rory" he asked. he'd known for a while. once while he'd been with his great grandmother as a boy she had let slip what had happened. jayden had figured that his parents didn't want him to know about it because they hadn't told him, so he'd never mentioned that he'd known. now he figured what was the harm, they were all about to become less innocent. "because i want to know if one can control you without you knowing. if there was some way to make a person do your bidding and them not having any memory of it" he was still curious and willing to believe that not everyone on the bad side wanted to be there. there was too much good in the world, wasn't there? "people are acting different. so i thought i'd ask. albus had a go at james. a horrible dig at him. he accused him of being the person behind the attack on ethan. that's not like him at all. there are others acting odd too. it's just strange" he said, chewing his lip as he hoped he hadn't told his father too much. he didn't want to be the one to rat on the group. not in a million years.

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Neville chuckled at his son’s lighthearted complaint about his sister. It was good to know that Jayden and Phil could look past Alice being so cold to them when she was little. Alice herself still felt uncomfortable about it all, he thought, though she covered it well. He ruffled Jay’s hair affectionately. “As big as me, huh? Just so long as you keep better track of your feet than I did at your age, feel free.” Not that he had much to worry about. Both of his sons were athletes, and his daughter had a featherlight touch with animals, and none of them were as clumsy as he was—though Phil came closest, when surprised. He sighed, though, when Jayden asked if Alice was hostile toward the Lestranges because of Bellatrix. “No, I don’t think she holds it against them. But Alice may have her own reasons to dislike one of them, and if she does, she might choose to hide it behind that excuse.” Of course, Neville knew full well the reason, but he did not give away secrets he had been entrusted with.

He thought about what Jayden said. Albus had jumped on his brother? That was interesting. And given that it happened in front of Jay, it probably had something to do with the students meeting to try to figure out what to do about the killer. Oh yes, Neville had been expecting this ever since he’d reminded Aurora that James would always be in the middle of things. He sighed. “The Imperius Curse puts someone under your control, forces them to obey your commands. But they know they’re under control, they can even fight it. For example, the Imperius Curse can’t force me to attack someone I don’t want to. Possession would allow you to control someone without them knowing, but that’s not something easily done. You can’t maintain possession for long, and your victim has no memory of what they did while possessed, so Albus would be very confused afterwards if he had been controlled.”

But Jay was still young, and his life had been easier, with no slow, inexorable threat approaching. Everything that had happened had been in the last year, with no time to deal with things, to cope and prepare for it all to get worse. “I’m afraid there is no magical answer to this, Jaybird. Stress, frustration, and fear are getting to Albus and James and the others. Some people handle it better than others. James likes to go on the offense, he hates to wait. He probably really wants to do something about what’s going on, to stop it. Albus wants to do something too, but he wants to be careful, to come up with a good plan. He knows it’s not good to charge in blindly. James does too, but with all that’s happened, and how much he’s seen, he may be thinking a few risks are necessary. It’s…a hard line to toe. Someone has to stand in the middle, be the mediator. Someone who they’ll both listen to, and who will listen to both of them. I suppose you can’t tell me much about what actually happened?”

If this new student group had done any research into the DA, there was an enchanted paper out there somewhere, ready to punish anyone who talked about it directly…

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

“no, i don’t think she holds it against them. but alice may have her own reasons to dislike one of them, and if she does, she might choose to hide it behind that excuse.” jayden nodded a little. it wasn't all that hard to figure out the reason why alice didn't like aurora. the fact that alice had been making goo goo eyes at james since she knew what a boy was, was a pretty big give away. he wasn't sure if he was supposed to know so he had never said anything. "does that reason have anything to do with the fact she's had a crush on james since before i was born?" he said with a small smile. he'd never bring it up to alice. she was his sister and he loved her and clearly it was something that had hurt her and he wasn't going to add to that hurt. he just hoped she could get over it before she let it hurt her too much. he didn't like the thought of something hurting his sister, even if it was a potter and someone he considered a good friend. he bit his lip a little and shook that thought from his head for now at least. if james hurt her then he'd cross that brother bridge when he had to. "don't worry. if james hurts her i'll get him" he said almost joking but with a hint of serious behind his voice. someone hurt his sister and they'd meet the temper that a lot of people didn't know jay had.

“the mperius curse puts someone under your control, forces them to obey your commands. but they know they’re under control, they can even fight it. for example, the imperius curse can’t force me to attack someone i don’t want to. possession would allow you to control someone without them knowing, but that’s not something easily done. you can’t maintain possession for long, and your victim has no memory of what they did while possessed, so albus would be very confused afterwards if he had been controlled.” jay nodded thoughtfully on that subject. he didn't think albus had been under any kind of control at that point. but if it was actually possible to control someone without them knowing then maybe .. just maybe that's how the other side were getting things done. they might have someone who was capable of that. stranger things had happened before. "i think albus was just angry. not under anyone's control. but it is possible? so whoever killed that girl could have been under someone's control? what kind of knowledge would that take. could a student do it?" he was curious. there was also the chance that neville would go to harry with that little bit of curiosity and they could start focusing more on the school for what happened. they needed to start doing something. students at the school were starting to feel like sitting ducks and he didn't like feeling like that.

i’m afraid there is no magical answer to this, jaybird. stress, frustration, and fear are getting to albus and aames and the others. some people handle it better than others. james likes to go on the offense, he hates to wait. he probably really wants to do something about what’s going on, to stop it. albus wants to do something too, but he wants to be careful, to come up with a good plan. he knows it’s not good to charge in blindly. james does too, but with all that’s happened, and how much he’s seen, he may be thinking a few risks are necessary. it’s…a hard line to toe. someone has to stand in the middle, be the mediator. someone who they’ll both listen to, and who will listen to both of them. i suppose you can’t tell me much about what actually happened?” jay rubbed the back of his neck. what his father said was true. the group was split down the middle pretty much. for everything. some people wanted to go on the offense now and others wanted to wait and think things through. he was on the fence. he didn't want to see anyone else get hurt .. but they couldn't sit around forever and keep doing nothing could they. "the potter boys? when do they ever listen to anyone. albus is too stubborn to listen to anyone. james might listen to aruora." he glanced at his dad and at that moment he felt like bursting out and telling him everything. about the group, the help they needed to get organised and someone to help abby front a group of students that all seemed too headstrong for their own good. but he didn't. he'd signed the paper. secrecy above all else. "we were just hanging out. just a bunch of us. someone mentioned something about what happened to the girl and that's when albus accused james. don't tell uncle harry i told you. okay? i don't think they want their dad to know. i shouldn't have said anything."

he chewed his lip as he sat up from his father's shoulder. another question plaguing his mind. pulling his legs under him so they were crossed jay leaned his elbows on his knees and rested his chin on his hands his eyes staying on the flames as he thought about something he had heard someone in the great hall saying to her friend. her mother didn't want her to stay at the school. that it was dangerous. "would you ever pull us out of school? send us away to keep us safe?" he asked, turning his head to look at his father in the dull light of the burning out fire. "i heard some students talking .. their parents are worried." he wondered if his dad knew this already, since he was the headmaster. he was just curious. it couldn't be easy, thinking your kids were somewhere safe and then have two horrible things happen to students.

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Neville placed his hand on Jay’s head and pushed down lightly when he asked if Alice’s problem with Aurora was related to a certain crush she had had forever. “Your sister’s secrets aren’t mine to tell.” Jay’s next words had a sobering effect on Neville though—Jay had inherited from his mother that fierce sense of loyalty that overrode fairness sometimes. Neville still remembered how the Hufflepuffs had turned on Harry during the Triwizard Tournament, and Hannah had been among them. It was part of why he loved her, but like any other personality trait, it was a double-edged sword. Jay would have to temper that. “If James intentionally hurts Alice, that’s one thing. But if he doesn’t feel the same way for her that she does for him, and he doesn’t try to fool her into believing he does, then it’s not his fault that Alice is hurting. Never look for an outlet, Jaybird. Always, always make sure you’re doing the right thing. You can’t let emotions blind you.” He hoped that would get through, but he couldn’t be sure. Harry, Ron, Ginny, they all had tempers that flared and burned hot, blinding them with anger and making them lash out. Hermione had a lot more control over hers, but she still busted Malfoy’s nose when he finally pushed her over the edge. Neville was one of the few Gryffindors he knew of who turned cold and calculating when his anger peaked.

It helped him keep sight of what mattered, but it also made him much more vicious in handling situations.

Jayden was proving to be quite persistent with his questioning into mind control. It was beginning to make Neville wonder what his youngest son knew—or thought he knew. “Whoa there, Jaybird,” he said placatingly, to get the flow of questions to slow for a moment. “There are any number of ways that girl could have been killed. Personally, I think it was done on the spur of the moment. But whoever is doing this…they’re hiding. They don’t use their own wands, they don’t seem to plan ahead of time…they just wait for opportunities. This makes them hard to track. And…well, I can’t tell you what we know, but we know more than they realize.” Like the fact that someone on staff or in the Aurors was feeding them information. They’d acted based on a few tidbits Neville and Harry had dropped, just very subtle things that Neville could never have picked up on if Harry hadn’t told him exactly what to look for. Sometimes it was scary, how Harry’s mind could take the smallest clues and intuitively leap to the right conclusions from them. His unrivalled DADA skills were [i[nothing[/i] on his deductive abilities.

He laughed at Jay asking him when Potters listened. That would be never. Harry had caused and solved more problems through pure bullheadedness than most people would ever know, and his kids had that blood mingled with the blood of the Weasleys.

“would you ever pull us out of school? send us away to keep us safe? i heard some students talking .. their parents are worried.

Neville shook his head. “You know, I asked Gran the same thing once, when I was about your age. You know what she said? ‘You’re not asking me because you want me to, but because you don’t. If you don’t want to run from danger, that just proves you’re a Longbottom.’ Danger will always exist. Much as I might want to, I can’t protect you or your brother or sister from it completely, and if I could, it would be worse for you in the end. At least at Hogwarts, my presence should provide some measure of protection. I am, after all, a former Auror.”

He sighed. Not that his reputation seemed to be doing much good right now. If only he could actually learn who it was, he could remind the world why he was a terrifying individual. But they were too cautious, and thus far had avoided giving their identity away. “The truth is, many of your friends will likely stay in Hogwarts. The people in Dumbledore’s Army know that removing their children only gives power to the other side. They won’t do that.” That…and they trusted him. To stop this, and to do his level best to protect everyone until he could stop it.

Something he’d not done well at thus far.

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

jay grinned as he felt his father push his head down and he shook his hair lightly and looked at his father and joked. "hey, what would mom say about the violence here" he rolled his eyes just slightly as his father mentioned that his sisters secrets weren't their's to tell. "i know. it's her business and no one's to tell. which is why it's still a secret" he said. he wouldn't spill the beans on his big sister. she was harbouring a crush that might have been obvious to people who knew her, knew what she was like and how she reacted to things but it wasn't many people who could figure alice out. "he's got eyes though. he must know something's up." jay said, loyal to his older sister to the end. he knew it might have been wrong but his sister was his sister, his loyalty would always be to her over anyone else, well except maybe phil and his parents but anyone outside of their family had to come second. that's the way things were for jay. it was that black and white, clear as crystal for him. though his dad knew that jay would help anyone. he would never turn his back on someone in need. even if they had hurt someone he loved, he'd help them. it was a double edged sword, good in most cases and horrible in others. "only if he intended to hurt her will i unleash the wrath that is jayden longbottom" he said with a light grin, turning the subject around a little as he listened to his father's next words.

his father thought it had been a spur of the moment? jayden thought different. and he said as much. "i disagree dad. i think the whole point of the girl being attacked was to distract from something else. to have everyone's focus on the girl and what happened to her rather than whatever they were actually doing" he said as he rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. he wanted to be an auror one day, like his father was. after he played quidditch for a few years though, but still it was a career he wanted, this whole situation was something that was making that certain for him. "why can't you tell me what you know? don't take this the wrong way but it's students who are getting hurt. they're going after students and to me it almost feels like people are .. that being used as we're bait. that everyone is just waiting for someone to get attacked and the attacker to make a mistake so they can learn something." he knew his father would never do that. most of the people would never do that. but there were a few out there who would. they'd have no trouble letting a few kids get hurt in order to finally put their fingers on what had happened and who was behind it and take action against them. there were some out there not afraid of collateral damage.

he'd never ask his father to take him away from the fight. though he would try and help convince his brother and sister to keep away from it. he didn't want them getting hurt. he didn't want anyone getting hurt. "gran was a smart woman." he said fondly. he meant it. he looked at his father again as he kept talking waiting till it was okay for him to answer. "what if you get hurt dad? someone decides your in the way of them getting what they want?" it was a worry for him. his parents and his siblings getting hurt. he didn't want to loose them. his mother loosing his father would destroy her, the same would be said for his mother. if he lost his brother he'd just about loose his mind and if something happened to his sister he'd never forgive himself for it. he chewed his lip and kept his blue eyes staring at the red and gold in the fire, his thoughts stuck on his family at that moment. he got lost, in those thoughts. for more than a moment he was unaware he was still in the living room with his father.

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“He's got eyes though. He must know something's up.”

Neville chuckled at that. “You'd be surprised. Ginny says he's as thick as Ron when it comes to actual relationships. You don't want to know how long it took him to figure things out.” Which was neither a confirmation nor a denial of what Jayden had said. Not that denying it would do any good, he saw right through his sister. But Neville wouldn't come out and say it. He owed that much to Alice. He did pat his son on the head when he promised not to go after James unless he did something on purpose. “Well, let us hope that never has to happen. I've known you long enough to know Jamey wouldn't come out of that encoutner well.” He said it lightly, but the words were no joke. Jayden was a little bit like Ginny when he thought someone in his family was in pain. And that was...well, not a bad thing to be, but certainly not a good one either.

Neville being Neville, he took his son's theory seriously, even though he, Harry, and the Aurors had swept for such things and concluded that there was nothing done to the train. “A distraction is certainly possible, but what could a murder on the Hogwarts Express provide a distraction for? The Aurors were waiting when the train got to Hogsmeade, there was no disruption of events for the staff or students...as far as the schedule went, anyway. So far as we could tell, nothing had been done to the train itself. The Ministry wasn't even short-staffed on Aurors, since Harry and Ron ran the investigation themselves. Unless it was a more long-term thing. It certainly got the Ministry to put a considerable force of Aurors at the school.” For all the good that had done so far...which was more than most people realized. Thanks to a few findings and observations, Neville was almost certain that it was actually a student behind the attacks. He sighed. “I would like to, Jaybird. Merlin knows there are students that have the right to know what we know. But if I told you, you would tell Phil and Alice, so they would know. Phil would tell Andy to protect her. Alice would tell Jamey or Carcer. All three of them would want to do something, protect people. Word would spread. We can't risk it spreading to the culprit and having them be more careful moving forward. It's an unfortunate fact of life that the fewer people who know something, the more likely it is to stay secret.”

“We are not using the students as bait, that I can assure you. The curfew and the students being required to stay in groups is there for a reason.” In point of fact, the Aurors had been using Polyjuice Potion to transform themselves into lower-year students at random to wander the halls, hoping to get “caught” by the attacker. So far, they'd had no luck, which was truly unfortunate. Then Jay voiced a worry that he knew had been there for awhile. Would Neville be hurt? The former Auror sat and watched the fire in silence for a moment. “That's certainly possible, Jay. I'm not invincible. But that's my job. I chose to stand in front of everyone else, and to keep standing there, no matter what came. It's a choice you can make too...though I truly hope you don't for a while yet. Besides, it's not like they'd be wrong—I AM getting in their way, or trying my damndest to, at any rate.” He knew this was a real fear for his family—they were all so close, the loss of any one of them would shatter all the others for a time. They would endure it, but...it wouldn't be easy.

“Don't be too concerned with what might happen in the future. Focus on enjoying the here and now, and make good memories to help keep you above water when the bad times come. Don't worry about me. I may not be invincible, but as long as I'm at Hogwarts, I'm the next best thing. And I'm not that easy to kill, you know. Every dark witch and wizard in the last forty years has tried. Most of them tried personally. They'll all dead or locked away, and I'm still here.”

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

"are you saying i have a hidden temper father?" jay said with a grin. he knew it was there of course. it didn't raise it's ugly head often but it was there. hidden below a surface of optimism, hope and all around nice guy. jay prided himself on the fact he was considered one, he didn't want to be someone that people thought was mean, or hold grudges. his parents hadn't raised him like that. he ran his hand over his hair when the conversation turned to the killing of the girl and he chewed his lip, listening to his father's answer. he had a theory about that as well. he knew that his father and the other aurors would have done all they could to look for things, to examine what had happen and try and work out the motive. but no matter how good someone was at their job. they could miss things, right? "i think it was a long term distraction. everyone is so focused on trying to find out who hurt the girl and who hurt ethan and who keeps hurting students at the school, not that it feels like their looking very hard. but i'm just saying it might be giving them a chance to plan something else, something bigger without worry that they'll be caught out. that's just my theory anyway. i also think they're hiding in a house other than slytherin. whether it's a student or a teacher or someone else in the school .. " he said, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck. he wasn't an auror yet, he didn't know exactly how they were trained to think or how to see things but that was his gut feeling. maybe it just wasn't honed yet.

"every student has the right to know. if there's one thing that you know that helps us stay safe .. even if you don't know it yet. wouldn't you want that? but telling people might not be such a bad thing. sure it might make them run and hide or it might make them rush their plans and slip up or make an error while they're trying to hide themselves. they wouldn't expect you to tell people things. they'd probably expect it to be kept well hidden from the publics eye as not to cause a mass panic." he said, well aware that he was kind of talking over his father but that had been on his mind and he had only had a second to blurt it out all rushed before he forgot it again. "i didn't say you were, i said it felt like it. there's a difference. and what if someone we're in a group with is the person behind the attacking? what if we're in a group with a teacher and they're the person behind it all and decide to kill us in a large number to make a bolder statment?" he shook his head a little, biting his lip and feeling a little bad. he wasn't trying to argue with his dad and it seemed that is exactly what he was doing. "i'm sorry. i don't mean to argue i really don't .. "

when he voiced his worry about his father being hurt, jay turned his head to watch his father's profile half hidden by shadows. he chewed his lip a little and nodded. he knew his father wouldn't back down. that he would protect any student at the school as best he could regardless of what happened to him. well he'd protect anyone that needed it. jay himself was a lot like that. he'd grown up rooting for the underdog. "i'll never choose to stand anywhere else" he said with a small smile, shaking his head a little as he leaned back against the couch. "i guess i'm too much like you" he said, the smile still light on his face. he rested his elbows on his knees and leaned his head back against the fabric of the chair. "mom can't loose you dad .. i think she'd cope better with loosing me, alice or phil .. i mean after all you can always have more kids" he said honestly. he thought that. he'd rather have something happen to himself that have to watch his mother try and cope without his dad. his mother was the strongest woman jay knew but even strong people had their limits.

[Deleted]

“Are you saying I have a hidden temper, Father?”

Neville smiled slightly at the joke, but his next words were quite somber. “You do. It's so hidden, you don't even know you have it. You won't understand until you're pushed to the point you feel it yourself, but there's no raging inferno behind the flames of a lost temper. Instead, what you'll find...is ice.” Not that he hoped his son would ever have to learn what he could do when truly, righteously furious, but odds were, all his children would experience it, sooner or later.

He let his son lay out his thoughts entirely before speaking again. Of course, there was something long-term going on, but that was for Harry and Ron to figure out. It was Neville's job to do the best he could to protect the people within Hogwarts. But it wasn't protection to give away any information they had to everyone. Trading away better awareness for everyone in the short-term for the culprit becoming more knowledgeable about covering their tracks in the long-term was a bad thing, and could just as easily increase the final body count as it could decrease it. He sighed. “Honestly, Jaybird, even if we told everyone everything we knew, the answer to staying safe wouldn't change. Staying in groups, respecting the curfew...the only attacks so far have been on isolated students that were out when they shouldn't be. Believe me—I know it sucks not having all the information. But there are upsides to it as well. When you have no suspicions or expectations, you see things more objectively. And that is a valuable thing in itself. You might catch something I don't, because I know something that makes me look at it differently than you.”

He knew Jayden would choose to fight. He was almost more like Harry than Neville: Jayden, like Harry, always knew he would one day stand and fight. Neville had never expected such a thing, but found that when it came, he simply could not stand not to. But he had a feeling that Jayden WOULD be a lot like him when actually fighting...unwilling to take chances and let people escape to hurt others. It was, perhaps, a curse of their family: they were rarely hesitant to kill. To a Longbottom, the only blood on their hands is the blood of those killed by someone they could have stopped.

Neville froze at Jay's next words. Did he really believe that...? The Longbottom Patriarch reached one arm around his youngest son and squeezed him tightly, even while the other delivered a solid but harmless smack to the back of his head. “Don't for an instant think your death would be easier on your mother than mine, Jayden Alex Longbottom,” he said sternly, but without any heat behind his words. “You're not replaceable, not now, not ever. Your mother and I could have more children, but we could never have another Jaybird. Your mother accepted a long time ago that I would never stand aside, no matter how dangerous the situation. If I died, she would be devastated. She would not be unprepared, and she would be able to cope with it.”

Then, almost as an afterthought, he added, “Not that I intend to die anytime soon. I will at least live long enough to see all my grandchildren, and as I recently became a father of five, I expect that will take quite some time.”

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

“Don't for an instant think your death would be easier on your mother than mine, Jayden Alex Longbottom,” “You're not replaceable, not now, not ever. Your mother and I could have more children, but we could never have another Jaybird. Your mother accepted a long time ago that I would never stand aside, no matter how dangerous the situation. If I died, she would be devastated. She would not be unprepared, and she would be able to cope with it.” jay leaned against his father's side when his dad hugged him tightly. he should have known he'd get that sort of reaction from his father. parents never wanted to think about something happening to their kids, always saying that they'd rather something happened to them. it was the other way around for kids. jay didn't want anything to happen to his parents. he'd do anything he could to not watch his mother go through the grief of loosing his father or phil or alice or even andy and rory. "you never know, if i did die and you had another kid .. you might get a jayden 2.0 or something even better" jay said, joking but still the same meaning that he had before. "it doesn't matter how prepared mum is .. " he said, leaning against his father again and turning his head to look up at him. he hadn't meant to turn the conversation to talking about any of them dying. he shook his head slightly and rubbed his finger into his eyes lightly, warding off a slightly sleepy feeling. "i can't wait till i can have kids .. though i think i might keep you and mum from seeing them .. you'd spoil any grand kid you have" jay said with a light smile before he looked at the fire again, his thoughts heading back to the start of the conversation.

"we're going to have to fight aren't we? do the same thing that you did when you were in school. make some of the same choices." he said, biting his lip at the thought and staring at the fire. he wasn't a chicken. there wasn't anyway he'd turn and run from a fight in order to save his own skin. but he would be lying if he said that the thought didn't terrify him. no kid wanted to fight like that. no kid wanted to watch people get hurt or hear about people dying especially when it was all happening so close to them. he didn't think he could tell anyone that though. he was supposed to be brave wasn't he? he pulled his knee up to his chest and rested his chin down on it and wrapping one arm around it so it was more comfortable. "i think i'm not going to play quidditch after i graduate . just go straight to working at the ministry" he'd made no secret of his plans to play quidditch for a few years before he tried to become an auror but with everything that was happening he was starting to think he would just go into the auror training program at the ministry. what difference could he make playing quidditch? none really. but if he became an auror then he could make a difference sooner. he hoped.

[Deleted]

Neville sighed and ruffled Jayden’s hair. “There will never be another Jayden Longbottom.” He didn’t think Jayden was really wrong about Hannah not coping well with his own death, though he knew his son underestimated how badly she would take the death of any of her children. The issue wasn’t really how well she would take the losso f her family, but how she would respond. That was what really worried Neville. As willing as he was to kill when he believed it necessary, he didn’t like the idea of his Hannah going on a rampage to cut down whoever got lucky enough to kill him. She deserved better than that. He snickered at Jayden’s next comment. “It is the right of all people to spoil their grandchildren,” he chided, “though you may want to wait a bit before you get started. Children are an incredible amount of work, and they require great sacrifice. Particularly in your case—babies mean waking up at all hours of the night and a lot less sleep in general.”

Boy, if there was one way to get Jay’s attention, it was to threaten his bedtime.

He thought about what Jayden asked next, about having to do the same things. While it was a sad truth that they might have to fight, Neville couldn’t see it being the same thing that he himself had gone through. “There are differences. In my case, our enemies were out in the open, in control. We couldn’t stop them easily, because those at the top stayed hidden, and it was impossible to be sure whether a given person was supporting them, or being controlled by them somehow. That’s not the case this time. We know the people in charge—Harry, Hermione, myself—are on our side. We’re all micromanaging to a degree, making it harder to go behind our backs. We know who we can trust to be in charge of things. Will you have to fight? Sad to say, most likely you will. Will it be as bad as the fight we went through? Not happening. If they try to say different, well…your dad’s still got a little bit of fight left in him.”

“I think I'm not going to play quidditch after I graduate. Just go straight to working at the ministry.”

And that was something Neville truly feared. He didn’t mind it, personally, standing at the forefront of battle, but that aside, he still mostly lived the life he wanted. He had his wife and children, he had his plants, he got to help people every day as a professor rather than a warrior. And it scared him that his son might put aside his own life for the sake of others. “Oh, my brave little bird. I’m proud that you want to help others, I really am. But you must not forget that your own life has as much meaning and value as anyone’s.” He lay his head back, remembering how much Harry had given up as a child. That haunted, dead look in his eyes, that only people who understood could see, and how long it took for it to go away.

“No matter how you live your life, even if you sacrifice yourself in the line of duty to save others, your life is merely a drop of water in the endless river of time. The will to die for others is strong. The will to live is stronger. Even as someone who can’t help but stand up for others, you must remember—this is your life. It is, perhaps, not yours alone, for there are those connected to you, and they own a part of you. But it is yours to live. You must live it for yourself as much as anyone else. Think on that before you decide what you want to do in life.”

@henry

[Deleted]

@superluigi64

“It is the right of all people to spoil their grandchildren, though you may want to wait a bit before you get started. Children are an incredible amount of work, and they require great sacrifice. Particularly in your case—babies mean waking up at all hours of the night and a lot less sleep in general.” jayden mocked surprise and grinned a little. he shook his head and watched the fire with a light smile. he didn't plan on having kids for at least a few years. he wanted to have at least started his career before he thought about having kids. he'd probably get married if he found someone before his career was settled but hey one never knew how these things were going to turn out. he might even turn into the old grump with no wife and no kids and a bajillion cats to keep him company. he grinned at the thought before looking at his dad. "nothing is worth loosing sleep over, not even my own kid" he said with a grin, he was joking really. he hoped. "i'll just be a dad during the daylight hours and hope i have a kid who never gets sick, sleeps all night and doesn't make much noise" he added on. he was only fifteen, that's what he reckoned kids should be like. he was sure he'd been a wonderful .. okay yeah he couldn't even think that without trying not to laugh. he'd been a terror and he knew it. scrapes and trying things he shouldn't. his curiosity had been huge and he had been forever getting into things. what he remembered was a lot so he was sure his parents had even more stories to tell. one of the biggest things he could remember doing was trying to follow wizards out of the pub when he'd been a toddler. just to see where they went when they weren't inside.

“There are differences. In my case, our enemies were out in the open, in control. We couldn’t stop them easily, because those at the top stayed hidden, and it was impossible to be sure whether a given person was supporting them, or being controlled by them somehow. That’s not the case this time. We know the people in charge—Harry, Hermione, myself—are on our side. We’re all micromanaging to a degree, making it harder to go behind our backs. We know who we can trust to be in charge of things. Will you have to fight? Sad to say, most likely you will. Will it be as bad as the fight we went through? Not happening. If they try to say different, well…your dad’s still got a little bit of fight left in him.” he ran his hand through his hair at his father's next lot of words. it was sobering what they were talking about. the fact it could result in them loosing people they loved. other people loosing who they loved and the end of the wizarding world as they knew it. of course they wouldn't let it go without a fight but still, the possibility was real. "i never doubted you for a second dad. even though your bones creak i'm sure they'd be no match for you" he said with a slightly teasing tone in his voice. he nudged his father's shoulder lightly before their conversation moved on.

“Oh, my brave little bird. I’m proud that you want to help others, I really am. But you must not forget that your own life has as much meaning and value as anyone’s.” he bit his lip and shook his head slightly, letting out a sigh and he moved to sit forward, his elbows resting on his knee's and he turned his head to look at his father, who had in turn rested his own head back. "i'm not little dad. i haven't been for a while." he didn't have time to add anything else to that before his father started speaking again, so he waited. “No matter how you live your life, even if you sacrifice yourself in the line of duty to save others, your life is merely a drop of water in the endless river of time. The will to die for others is strong. The will to live is stronger. Even as someone who can’t help but stand up for others, you must remember—this is your life. It is, perhaps, not yours alone, for there are those connected to you, and they own a part of you. But it is yours to live. You must live it for yourself as much as anyone else. Think on that before you decide what you want to do in life.” he shook his head. he knew his father didn't want anything to happen to him and he was just trying to keep him safe jayden couldn't help but disagree with him. "you're wrong dad. it doesn't happen often but this time you are. i could never live my life just for myself. i could never live my life with a clear conscience if i ever put myself above someone else. if i knew that someone had been hurt or i could have been there to stop it or i could have been there to help them .. and i wasn't because i was too afraid of getting hurt. or to afraid of the people i loved loosing me .. i couldn't do it. if i died saving someone .. my life would still be a drop in the ocean for the rest of the world. but for the person i might have saved, it would have meant something." he didn't want to become and auror for the glory of it. saving lives and putting on a show. he wanted to do it to help keep the world safe like his father had for him and his siblings, like people had been doing for generations to keep the world safe for everyone in it. if he could help do that? well then he'd be happy. he could live his life. no matter how long that turned out to be.