Prodigal Son (Albus)

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Being informed that her middle child had moved out of the family home at seventeen years old—in favor of the Leaky Cauldron—hadn't gone over well with Ginny. From what she knew, Harry and Albus had butted heads, and that had been the final straw. Ginny hadn't even gotten the opportunity to tell Albus goodbye, nor had she been able to try to change his mind before he left.

He might have been seventeen and legally of age, but he was hardly responsible enough to leave home for good. Neville was kind enough to have taken him in, but where did he go from there? She wasn't sure if he had a clue about that, which left her worried sick. Albus had left his dogs, Dexter and Diesel, at home, at least, and Ginny knew that he wouldn't have left them behind for good. He would be back for them, eventually, though there was no telling when he would come to his senses.

Although she had wanted to send Albus a Howler to order him to come back, Ginny didn't want to burn any bridges with him, as had already happened with his father. If she could listen to why he felt that he needed to move most of his belongings into an inn, she thought, maybe she could convince him that she and Harry didn't hate him, nor did they want to disown him.

Ginny had, however, written Albus a letter, in which she had, in no uncertain terms, told him that she would be coming to the Leaky Cauldron to speak with him before he had to leave for school. Neville and Hannah would ensure that he wouldn't miss the train, so that was one weight off of her shoulders.

Ever since she had lost her memory nearly a year before, Ginny had leaned on Harry for back-up on most of her parenting skills, so confronting her child—who was already unhappy with one of the two of them—outside of their home made her doubt herself. She kept to her word, though, and was already seated at a table at the Leaky Cauldron when she saw Albus appear.

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

al hadn't been surprised when he had received a letter from his mother telling him that she was coming to see him. it had been a snap choice of his to leave the afternoon that he had but he still thought it was the right one. he wasn't walking around on edge waiting for things to boil over again. he always felt he had to watch what he said at home, someone would usually jump at him for something, his father and james in particular and albus would get his back up and it would turn into a huge argument. it wasn't how he wanted to live, he didn't like fighting and how easy it was at the moment to get his temper going. so he had made the choice to leave, take himself out of the equation that was always ending in a fight and right now he was happier for it. though deep down he did miss them.

he walked out of his room and locked the door behind him, heading down into the bar area of the leaky cauldron and he spotted his mother straight away. her red hair gave her away in almost any room she was in. he rubbed his hand over the back of his neck and moved down the stairs and he worked his way across to the table she was sitting at. he wondered if she had recovered any more of her memories while he'd been gone, he had been meaning to send her a letter but he had been working out what to do next and getting caught up in spending time with dusti. he moved to sit into the seat across from her, folding his arms on the table he leaned against it lightly. "hey mum"

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Ginny watched Albus as he descended the stairs, happy to see that he didn’t appear to be angry with her. She tried not to focus on him too much; she didn’t want him to think that she was staring him down, but she wanted some indication of how their first time seeing one another since his having left home would go, especially because she didn’t have Harry’s word on which to fall back.

He reached where she was sitting, sat down across from her, and leaned on the table. There wasn’t much in the way of excitement in his demeanor; he probably wanted to get things done and over with so that he could pack for his return to school. Ginny had to remind herself that, when it came to excitement, Albus was no Lily, and trying to compare him to his younger sister would only result in hostility on his part. “Hey, Mum.”

“Hi, Albus.” She smiled, still working on feeling relaxed. “How’ve you been?” Giving him the floor to express his feelings first seemed like the right thing to do; that way, he wouldn’t think that Harry had sent her to try to convince him to return home—or whatever was possibly running through his head.

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

“Hi, Albus.” he wondered how hard she was trying to stay calm right now. he couldn't imagine it was all easy for her. having to deal with a troublesome teenager when she had no idea about him really. it wasn't something he'd like to do but what had happened had happened. “How’ve you been?” he nodded a little. things had been good. he'd been helping hannah around the pub, mostly cleaning up and helping stock the things that needed stocking but it was still a small price to pay considering she and neville had let him come stay. "things have been good. aunt hannah has me been putting me to work" he said as he took one of the coasters from the middle of the table and started turning it around in his hands lightly. he wanted to tell her he wasn't coming home. he didn't want her to think she'd be able to talk him into it or that he was somehow feeling guilty because he'd left. he tapped the coaster against his other hand and he looked at his mother, trying to keep his green eyes softer than they usually were. "i'm not coming back home mum. this is it, i'll find my own way when the school year is over" he said softly and he put the coaster down and ran his hand through his hair, waiting for her reaction.

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“Things have been good,” Albus answered her. “Aunt Hannah has been putting me to work.” He had been spending his time productively, at least, which was one good thing that had come out of his having left.

And that was possibly the only good thing that had come out of his having left, too, as—fiddling around with a drink coaster as he spoke—he announced, “I'm not coming home, Mum.” That was it, he told her. He was done. Finished.

Silently, Ginny wondered what to say to him. She was better off saying exactly what was on her mind, and she restrained herself from grabbing the coaster from Albus's reach. “Just because I can't remember some things,” she began, “that doesn't mean that I'm not your mum.” She would always be his mother, whether he liked it or not. “Your dad and I want to help you, Albus.” There was no way that they would just leave him without any support. If he wanted it or needed it, it would be there for the taking.

“Listen. I don't know what in the name of Merlin either of you said or did in that row of yours,” she continued, referring to the fight between Harry and Albus that had ended in Albus's decision to leave home, “but your dad's given up so much for you, James, and Lily.” Ginny paused. “…And me.” The way she said it, it was almost an afterthought.

“My point is, Albus,” she said, trying to get herself back on the subject at hand. “It's not fair to me—and it's especially not fair to him—for you to throw away your future because you've got your wand in a knot.”

It begged the question: “Have you got any sort of a plan for what you're actually going to do?”

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

“Just because I can't remember some things, that doesn't mean that I'm not your mum.Your dad and I want to help you, Albus.” it took everything in him not to scoff and roll his eyes. in the last few days he'd been shown exactly how much his father wanted to help him. none. he shook his head slightly. his mother didn't get it. she might have asked things about him, might have seen things in the last few months but that didn't mean she knew what was going on in his dad's head. there was every chance she still saw him as the eighteen year old she remembered. “Listen. I don't know what in the name of Merlin either of you said or did in that row of yours, but your dad's given up so much for you, James, and Lily, And me.” was this the way the whole conversation was going to go? he couldn't help but feel angry. she hadn't even asked what had happened, what had gone down or what had been said. she just assumed that albus should see that his father had been right purely on what he had done in the past? he frowned and leaned back from the table and away from his mother, shifting in his chair and folding his arms across his chest. he did it without even thinking. "i'm sure he did" he snapped, unable to help his anger flowing through into his words.

“My point is, Albus, It's not fair to me—and it's especially not fair to him—for you to throw away your future because you've got your wand in a knot.” his eyes narrowed slightly, the green glinting slightly as some sort of heat flashed behind them. "oh i get it. you don't care how i feel .. all you care about is that you think it's not fair on you and him. wonderful" he said, shifting a little more and sitting up slightly taller. "how about me? is it fair on me to be in a house where i get judged for every reaction i have to anything? where nothing i do is ever good enough? where i'm not allowed to act like myself because it annoys you all?" he shook his head slightly. "i'm the happiest i've been in months. you think i like being at home? james and i fight over everything. dad and i fight over everything. and you want me to come home to that because you feel you've been wronged?" he had finally started relaxing again. the last few weeks had been horrible. "if you really want to be like my mother .. you should be glad i'm happy. or is miserable what you like your children to be" the tension that had been in the house. now he wasn't around the constant tension he felt relaxed, well he had until this conversation. now he was tense, the back of his neck was throbbing and the temper rising in him was almost too much for him to handle. "me leaving isn't me throwing away my future. it's the start of it. i'm joining the auror progam when i leave school. though i'm sure dad failed to mention that i had any sort of plan for my future, since it didn't seem to be good enough for him. even though i'm the only one of your children with an actual plan." he said as he moved to stand up from the table. "unless you want to start acting like my mother and stop acting like dad is god's gift to the world .. this conversation is over"

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Listening to his tirade against his father had begun to make Ginny's blood boil. Harry… Harry had almost ended his career as an Auror because of the post-traumatic stress that he had felt… She remembered it. She remembered her holding him as he remained terrorized by whatever it was that had triggered it… She'd had to remind him that he was safe, that he was strong enough to carry on, in spite of his doubts… And Albus was sitting there with his arms folded.

Ginny knew that she couldn't allow her son's words to get to her. He said that he understood it, but it was crystal clear that he didn't, in Ginny's view. He hadn't been there to witness his father's agony. That wasn't his fault because he was too young, but Ginny didn't think that it would hurt for her middle child to think of someone other than himself.

“How about me?” he asked, and Ginny was floored. What had she and Harry done to him? They had given him everything they could. Albus began to talk about how he felt as though he was being judged by them for every little thing that he did, and he claimed that he was the happiest that he had been in months. “James and I fight over everything. Dad and I fight over everything. And you want me to come home to that because you feel you've been wronged?”

“If you really want to be like my mother…” It was at that point that Ginny had almost blown up at him, but she had waited until after he had explained that he did have a plan for his future, unlike his siblings. What had bothered Ginny the most was how Albus had begun to treat her. She wasn't “like” his mother; she was his mother, regardless of what had happened to her.

He couldn't order her around, either, on that basis, and she would be the one to end their conversation. “Albus Severus Potter,” she began, her jaw tense. “Sit down. You're not going anywhere until I'm finished. Do I make myself clear?” If he wanted her to act more like his mother, she would. After all, he had asked for it.

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

“Albus Severus Potter, Sit down. You're not going anywhere until I'm finished. Do I make myself clear?” he knew he was angering her but he couldn't stop it. he couldn't. what was he going to do? tell her he'd been wrong and he was sorry? he wasn't. he'd made the best choice he could for him and he wasn't going to let his parents punish him for it. though not that she really seemed to care much about him in that moment anyway. she was too busy focusing on the fact that she thought he had wronged her and his father in that very moment. he doubted what was best for him was even crossing her mind in that very moment. he made a move to push the chair he had been sitting on under the table and he looked at her. "no." he said as he let the chair go and he shook his head slightly at her. "you don't care do you. you honestly don't care .. you don't care about what happened or or what dad said or why i left. just that i did and you feel like i wronged you and dad" he said as he took a step back from her. "you might be my mother but you can't control me. i'm seventeen and i no longer live under the same roof as you. i love you mum i really do .. but don't think that you have any power over me" he told it to her straight. he was an adult. granted he was only seventeen but he was capable of making his own choices and it seemed to him that he was doing a better job of making them than his parents had in the last seven years. after all they had let james torment and hate him. oh they had told him off sure but there had never been anything really done about it. lily could do no wrong in the eyes of her parents and he always seemed to draw the short straw, the sharp word and the tongue lashing if he did something wrong. he was done with that. "he called me worthless. said everything i'd worked hard for in the last year was worth nothing. that it didn't matter. that because i wasn't like him i wasn't good enough" he said, folding his arms over his chest as he looked at his mother. "that's what happened." he told her, wanting her to at least know what the man she was defending had said to him.

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“No,” Albus told her. He wasn't going to sit down again. He claimed that she didn't care, and it made Ginny's heart ache. She tried to mask her hurt with anger as she listened to him say that she didn't care.

He didn't care to listen to her, either, Ginny thought, her nostrils flared as she tried to decide whether it would be better to scream at Albus or to break down and cry out of frustration. Albus began to distance himself from her, stepping back from the table.

Ginny stood from the table, too. She slid her chair back underneath it as calmly as she could. “Last I checked, you were still my son. Do you think I would be here right now if I didn't give a damn about you?!” she demanded, stopping short of slamming her fist against the table.

“You might be my mother, but you can't control me.” That was true; Ginny couldn't control what he did, but she could assert her opinion when she thought that her son was making an incredibly stupid mistake.

“He called me worthless,” Albus explained, and Ginny knew that he must have been speaking of Harry. “Said everything I'd worked hard for in the last year was worth nothing.” Ginny knew that couldn't have been true. Harry couldn't have said that to their son. Their children had had to get used to having a mother who knew nothing about them and, day by day, was still having to learn how to be the mother they expected. The few memories that she had of her three teenage children were the ones that she had made in the past year. That was all.

Sighing, Ginny leaned her elbows on the back of the chair in which she had been sitting. “Blimey. I don't remember the past sixteen years, Al,” she reminded him once more, “but I know that you're your father's son, even if neither of you want to admit it. You're so much like him, and you're not worthless.” They were both exceptionally stubborn when they wanted to be—not that she couldn't be, too. “And, the last year…” What could she say about the year that had changed her life? It had changed all of their lives. “It's not my fault, Albus.” She begged him to understand that she hadn't asked for any of what had happened to her or any of the pressure that she had placed on her husband and children.

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

“Last I checked, you were still my son. Do you think I would be here right now if I didn't give a damn about you?!” al shook his head and frowned slightly. he'd be lying if he said he believed she cared about him leaving. "i think you give a damn about the fact i left! it's the why i left and the fact dad had a hand in it that you don't care about!" he retorted to her. he knew they wee garnering some strange looks from the people around them but for once al didn't care. he was too angry with his mother in that moment to think much about what they thought of the whole situation. normally he didn't like public shows of anger. as hard as it would be to believe in that moment he actually hated showing his anger at all but his parents seemed to bring it out in him. only two other people had that ability, james and ondina and he hated the latter. "don't treat me like an idiot mum. i know the real reason why you're here. you wanted to talk me into coming home .. tell me that i was wrong for moving out and i did it for the wrong reasons .. and to forgive dad for something you think he didn't do. because the great harry potter can do no wrong in your world and his." he said with a frown and he folded his arms.

“Blimey. I don't remember the past sixteen years, Al, but I know that you're your father's son, even if neither of you want to admit it. You're so much like him, and you're not worthless.” he couldn't help but scoff and roll his eyes slightly, harry's words still to fresh and still causing too much of a sting in him to allow him to believe it wasn't the opinion he had. "i know i'm his son. that's the problem." he said with a frown and he folded his arms as she leaned on the table. "tell that to your husband. he's the one who seems to think i am because i'm not him" he bit back, unable to keep his tongue from being sharp. “And, the last year… It's not my fault, Albus.” what? when had this conversation turned into something about her memory loss. he groaned and dropped his head back over his shoulders and raised his hands in the air. letting them fall back to his sides. "i give up .." he said as he lifted his head to look at her. "merlin forbid i actually need you and dad to try and understand .. and you won't. you both make it all about you every time. no matter what it is .. it always comes back around to you" he said with a shake of his head and he turned from the table again. "i'll see you around mum."

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Everything Albus said seemed to circle back to how angry he was at his father, and Ginny was beginning to hate that Harry wasn't there to explain himself. She didn't want to put words in his mouth, and she didn't know enough of what had been said between them to try her hand at it. If Harry had been there with her, the yelling might have been amplified some, but at least he and Albus would have been able to get some resolution… she hoped.

The worst part about having to talk to Albus one-on-one was that she couldn't lean on Harry to not feel like such a horrible person. Albus told her not to treat him like an “idiot”, though Ginny was left flabbergasted as to from where he had gotten that idea.

“I know the real reason why you're here,” he said, and Ginny waited to hear it. She didn't think that she had been trying to hide her intentions, but she thought that he would have appreciated that she had tried to hear his side of the argument. Albus was correct when he said that she had come to try to talk him out of moving out of their family home so soon, and Ginny even felt inclined to nod at his words. When he brought up Harry's fame again, though, she pursed her lips into a frown.

“I know I'm his son. That's the problem.” Ginny didn't think that it would have been such a problem if her husband and younger son had listened to one another, and she bristled when Albus referred to Harry as being her husband—and not as his father.

Albus's groan wasn't a good sign, and he raised his hands in defeat. “I give up…” There was a small part of Ginny that wanted to ask him what he meant; they needed communication on both sides, and she had tried her hardest to do her part. She listened to him as he continued, trying to calm herself down when he said that he would see her “around”.

“If you want to leave,” Ginny shrugged, “fine.” If he was trying to see if she was going to beg him to stay, she thought, it wasn't working. She didn't think that she was supposed to have her child tell her how to parent him, although she was left to wonder what she was doing wrong. “I can't make you accept that your dad and I are human, too—the ‘Chosen One’ and his Hogwarts sweetheart or not.” She was supposed to be able to provide him with life lessons, and she wished that she had one to explain that she wasn't trying to be selfish. Without knowing what had happened in the more recent half of her life, however, Ginny had to settle for sounding painfully repetitive.

“What I can do,” she added, “is tell you that we love you.” Ginny knew that Albus wasn't asking more of her than she should have been able to give him. He didn't see her as the seventeen-year-old that she had to remind herself she wasn't. “Because we do.”

“And, right now,” she continued, “I'm trying to understand what I haven't done, or said, or been…” She couldn't remember a time when she had been anything but supportive of all three of her children. Ginny knew that she was still herself, but she had always imagined that she would have had more than a year to ease into being the mother of three teenagers. She had had that time—their childhoods—but her inability to remember it made it as if she had never had it at all.

“Until I've got those memories back, I can only tell you what I know. My seventeen-year-old son has decided to move out before he's finished with school, and he's left me to take care of his two dogs while he runs away from his problems instead of trying to solve them like the adult he thinks he is.”

Ginny didn't think that Albus realized how lucky he was to have parents who cared about him as much as she and Harry did. They could put up with his tantrum; they had been through worse, and they had a village behind them—including the Longbottoms—who weren't about to put Albus out on the street.

“And I think he knows where to find me,” she finished, stepping away from the table before either one of them ended up causing more damage.

@al

[Deleted]

@ginevra

she wasn't sure what she'd done? well of course. his dad would sugar coat it all wouldn't it. try and paint himself as ginny as the perfect parents. "what you've done? you treating me differently is a big one. playing favorites is a big one too. letting james torment me for seven years was pretty big too .. the list goes on but i think you get the picture. i'm pretty sure dad's sugar coated everything he's told you about the time you can't remember. if he didn't it would paint him in a bad light and that's the last think he wants."

he didn't understand them. he couldn't. both of them were upset that he had moved out of home. they had both seen the fights between him and james, both seen the figts between himself and his dad and she didn't think there was a problem with that? or was she convinced the problem was albus. well maybe he was the problem but he was the only one willing to do something about it. "you can't see it can you. the toll that living at home was taking on me. the constant fighting, the constant need to defend myself against dad and the constant conflict with james. or did you forget that i blew up a tower last year and almost killed myself? you want me to be like that still? you want me to still be that wound up from everything that that happened? i can't express things like you guys. i can't just let things slide. they build up till i can't take it anymore. now that feeling? that tension? it came back. it's been building since summer started, since i was back at home. and you want me to go back to that? you blame me for leaving an environment that's toxic? too much has happened in the last seven years. i don't trust you and dad right now. i can't trust you right now because you keep letting me down. you can't let me be myself because it doesn't reflect how you think i should be."

when she mentioned his dog he frowned. he wasn't going to leave them at home for a minute longer than he needed too. he wanted them where he knew they would be taken care of. "the dog's won't be a problem. james is bringing them over later. neville said they can live in the grove till i get my own place. i wouldn't have been leaving them at home anyway. i don't trust you and dad not to get rid of them just to punish me for me moving out."

she thought he was going to come looking for him? well that wouldn't happen. not till she could make more of an effort to understand why he was angry, why he'd left and she started to see that the house she lived in wasn't a happy one for everyone. "i won't be coming looking for you mum. not after this conversation. because clearly all you wanted was to come here and convince me that i was wrong and i'm not wrong. go back to dad, keep seeing the sun shine out of his ass. clearly you don't want to see him any other way." he watched her as she stepped from the table and he turned away, taking steps toward the stairs.

ooc -- you can end it with your post audrey

[Deleted]

“No one has been lying.” Couldn't he see that? He was making it seem as if she had been lying to him the entire time that they had been talking, and Ginny was at her wit's end. She couldn't help “playing favorites” Ginny thought to herself, when one of her three children seemed to be making it his mission in life to make his parents' lives even harder. If she had ever blatantly favored James or Lily over Albus, Ginny was genuinely sorry for it, but Albus couldn't have had a terrible life. Ginny was fully cognizant of the fact that her capabilities as a mother at the present weren't how they had been before her memory had been all but wiped, but she would be damned if Albus tried to paint her as being completely inept and her husband as a shameless liar.

“You can't see it, can you?” Albus accused her. She couldn't see it, when all she knew was the past year—just the tip of the proverbial dung heap—and how preoccupied she had been with trying to get her life back to what everyone else expected of her. While his explosion of one of the school's towers wasn't exactly insignificant, plenty of things had happened during her time at Hogwarts, too. A certain diary-turned-Horcrux rang a bell, not to mention the Basilisk. At Hogwarts, it was clear, near-death experiences were par for the course. They had happened a little less frequently in the years that followed the defeat of Lord Voldemort, from what she knew, but there were always risks.

Albus asked her if she wanted him to be “like that still”—how he had been in the aftermath of the explosion. Although he spoke to the contrary, Ginny was surprised to hear that her middle child was opening up to her. “I can't express things like you guys,” he explained. “I can't just let things slide.” If only he had been so honest with her from the beginning, Ginny thought, they might have been able to figure something out, how to make things better for him. He went on to say that that same tension he'd felt was building within him again and had been since the beginning of the summer.

“Too much has happened in the last seven years. I don't trust you and dad right now. I can't trust you right now because you keep letting me down. You can't let me be myself because it doesn't reflect how you think I should be.” Ginny wanted to scream that all that she wanted was for her children to be safe and happy. She didn't seem to be doing a very good job of that, under current circumstances, but that was all any of her family and friends had wanted. That was why she was still involved with the Order of the Phoenix, ready to take over for Harry, if the need—Merlin forbid—came up.

Ginny's head was filled with numerous thoughts, all of which began with “could have”, “would have”, or “should have”, though she continued to hear Albus out. He claimed that she and Harry would have gotten rid of his dogs as punishment, and she frowned at the thought that he believed them to be capable of such cruelty.

At Albus's last words to her, Ginny's eyes began to fill with tears. She had made it through their conversation without crying—or she had had every intention of making it through without crying, anyway—but hearing that he wouldn't be changing his mind because of how he felt that she viewed his father like some sort of idol was the final straw. He turned back towards the stairs; she turned in the opposite direction and wiped her eyes. “I still love you,” she whispered, praying that she could leave before Neville, Hannah, or anyone else saw her so upset.

@al

(Fin.)