WITCH WEEKLY FALL 2024 EDITION

[witch weekly]

WITCH WEEKLY

Barnabus Periwinkle

A STEP INTO THE NEXT GENERATION

Last month saw a momentous occasion as the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts department of the Ministry, and the Ministry of Magic officials approved the Conversion of Muggle to Magical Artifacts Act. This proposal permits Wizarding Inventors to enchant and modify muggle technology to function in the Magical world, and be sold to the general public. This act also permits magical inventors from Countries around the world to petition their own enhanced inventions be sold in the United Kingdom and Ireland.

While all modifications and enchantments will have to pass the EMAT (Enhancement of Muggle Artifacts Test), a process created by long time Misuse of Muggle Artifacts employee Arthur Weasley, this is a huge step in the Magical community.

“I’m pleased that the act has passed. If you spend any time in the Muggle world you’ll see the fantastic technological advances they’ve had, meanwhile we’ve been stuck in the dark ages. Permitting responsible Inventors to bring our world into the 21st Century is going to change everything we know.” Said Archibald Longstocking, a Scottish Wizarding Inventor and chairman of “A Magical World is a Modern World”, one of the main organizations that first began to push the approval of this act. He has been petitioning the Ministry to change the laws and regulations for Muggle Technology for the past 26 years, and he’s relieved to finally see his goal achieved.

While the Conversion of Muggle to Magical Artifacts Act has been met with excitement and acceptance as a whole there are still those who oppose it. The Wizarding World Conservation Society held a protest in Diagon Alley the day the Act passed. Their President, Agrippina Rosier, stated that permitting Muggle technology, magically modified or not, would lead to exposing their children to dangerous practices. In particular, she cites the internet, and technology that accesses it, as harmful to society. According to Mrs. Rosier her organization plans on continuing to raise awareness of the dangers of Technology and will be appealing the Ministry’s decision.

Despite opposition, several inventors in America have already sent the patents of Muggle-to-Magical inventions MACUSA already utilizes. The release date of these inventions is set for November 3rd 2024.

made by ritz! of cc & gs

written by Admin Sora

[witch weekly]

WITCH WEEKLY

Ira Thomas

Ministry Coverup: Exposed

Two years ago several students were kidnapped by the terrorist group known as the Purifiers from Hogwarts School. Before now very little information was known about the operation that rescued these students, aside from the fact that the kidnapped students were able to somehow communicate their location to Ministry officials.

But, after the Auror incident report for the rescue was leaked we know that only part of this cover story rings true. According to the incident report, a member of the Purifiers organization, Braelynn Rousseau, assisted Zander Lloyd, one of the kidnapped students, escape and contact an international hit wizard who notified not only Ministry officials but an organization that remained nameless in the report. Both forces arrived, and rescued the students.

What is most shocking about this Ministry cover up is the fact that non-Ministry individuals were involved, with no arrests for obstruction of justice. Among those present was none other than former Headmaster Neville Longbottom, whose position offered him no legal involvement in the incident. Many question why the Ministry permitted such Vigilantism, and also wonder if it’s due to the fact that Minister Hermione Granger favored her friends over her own Aurors. It is theorized that the illegal involvement of an official Auror Rescue mission was not only swept under the rug by the Minister herself when she was Head of Magical Law Enforcement, but also encouraged.
If our own Minister sanctioned illegal operations when she was Head of Magical Law Enforcement we shudder to think of what sort of activities she’s approved as Minister of Magic.

made by ritz! of cc & gs

written by Admin Sora

[witch weekly]

WITCH WEEKLY

Ionna Mesley

QUIDDITCH NEWS

Quidditch season has begun once again, and sparks sure are flying! After the first few matches, the scores thus far are:

Fitchburg Finches vs Holyhead Harpies
290 - 90
Despite the Harpies making a strong opening and taking the lead early on the Finches made an overwhelming comeback and scored 14 times in a row before finally catching the Snitch and ending the game.

Appleby Arrows vs Wimbourne Wasps
380 - 230
Known for their intense rivalry the Arrows and Wasps were evenly matched for almost five hours of play, the longest game of the season thus far. The first set of alternates were brought in only a few minutes before the Arrows seeker, managed to catch the Snitch.

Puddlemere United vs Yorkshire
190 - 200
To anyone that watched this game they would have bet on Puddlemere United. Yorkshire was being overwhelmed by their opponted, thwarted at every opportunity. By a stroke of genius the Yorkshire Seeker managed to feint the rival Seeker and snatch the Snitch, narrowly ensuring Yorkshire’s victory.

Falmouth Falcons vs Chudley Cannons
240 - 190
Another game that took a turn. The Falcons’ put up a good offense at the start and quickly took the lead. Rallied by their captain though, the Cannons soon turned things around and began to make their comeback, holding the Falcons’ offense off. The seekers were having a battle of their own as the Cannons’ Seeker prevented the Falcons’ from catching the snitch a total of four times! It wasn’t until a bludger took out the Cannons’ seeker that the Falcon’s finally caught the snitch and ended the match.

*The Professional Quidditch team matchups, scores, and Snitch captures are completely randomized with absolutely no favoritism towards teams with played characters.

made by ritz! of cc & gs

written by Admin Sora