Witch Weekly June 2025 Edition

[witch weekly]

Witch Weekly

ISSUE 5: June 9th 2025

Ministry's tech update

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The magical world has finally caught up with the non-magical world. After years of rejecting muggle technology the Ministry of Magic has been forced to accept these technological advances. Last fall, the Ministry approved the conversion of muggle artifacts to work in the magical community. The passing of this act has been an overwhelming success, and talented inventors have been able to convert many of the most common muggle artifacts, such as computers, laptops, telephones, and more.

Despite the technological advances of these inventors and the Conversion of Muggle to Magical Artifacts act many organizations, including the Ministry, have withheld from adopting and utilizing the advances. Due to Hag’s Fever and the quarantine currently in place though, the Ministry has been forced to quickly adapt. The quarantine has hindered international communication because of the slow travel of OWL post. So, with the assistant of MACUSA workers currently stationed in the Isles the Ministry has begun to integrate muggle technology in its own offices. E-mail and fax have already been in trial runs and have been an overwhelming success. With this success the Ministry will be moving into phase two of the plan and enchanted memos will be discontinued by the end of July 2025. While OWL post will still be utilized for communication with the community, all international communication has been through muggle technology since the beginning of the quarantine and will continue to do so after it lifts.

“Muggle technology has opened many doors for us, and the community. The Artifacts and Development department is bringing us into the 21st century and showing us that change is a good thing,” one Ministry official said, before adding, “It’ll be a learning curve for all of us though. We have quite a bit of catching up to do and many Ministry officials are set in their ways.”

Despite growing concerns of how the Ministry will adapt as a whole to the changes, hopes are high. The Ministry has created a new office in the Maintenance and Supply department to be in charge of all technology at the Ministry, training of officials, and the maintenance of said technology. This department, named “Information Technology” or “IT” for short, will be holding training seminars every Wednesday and Friday for all Ministry officials through June and July. In these trainings officials will be taught how to use computers, hand held phones, e-mail, WWWW (World wide wizard web), and more.

Article by BARNABUS PERIWINKLE (Written by Sora)

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[witch weekly]

Witch Weekly

ISSUE 5: June 9th 2025

New uses in the wizarding world

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The recent quarantine of the Wizarding world here in Great Britain has caused a lot of concern and confusion, specifically in the way of outside communication. Typical forms of communication across long distances have been shut down and Wizards are having to get creative. The introduction of Technology into Wizarding culture has been attempted several times before, but never was it so widely received as it is now.

The ministry recently reported a switch to muggle technology and released a list of suggested ways that citizens might incorporate in into their lives as well, including computers, email, and hand help phones, all of which can access the World Wide Wizard Web (WWWW).

The Board of Directors at St. Mungo's Hospital has since decided to adopt a new medical record system, the first of it’s kind seen in our world, where Healers and medical staff are able to use computers to record notes on patients and communicate throughout the facility without the accidental contamination of germs across floors. "Keeping people out of the infected area while still getting communication in has greatly improved our workflows." reported one healer.

Article by BARNABUS PERIWINKLE (Written by Ali)

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[witch weekly]

Witch Weekly

ISSUE 5: June 9th 2025

Social media takeover

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As an effort for children and their parents to keep in contact throughout the quarantine, cellular devices have become popular and most young witches and wizards are using them to call and message (other wise known as 'text') their families back at home. These devices are all enchanted by Ministry officials to link to them to the World Wide Wizard Web (WWWW) - an endless network of social networking, news, and information at our fingertips. It seems a new Application (commonly called an App) is being released almost everyday since the popularity of the devices has increased.

Currently the most popular among the youth seem to be: WixTok, a short form video sharing service where people post random, slightly humorous videos of them doing various things, and, Vibes, a social media platform popular for sharing short statements or thoughts. These statements are limited to 280 characters and often incorporate a Hashtag (#) to group similar Vibes together.

Apps like these seem to be promoting an ‘influencer culture’ which the wizarding world has always been familiar with; but now it seems anyone could become a well known name simply based on the number of likes they get. Close to the top of the popular Wizards page sits Gilderoy Lockhart Jr, who recently posted: “Going in for my first day of auror training! Going to kill it!. #onmyway” which went viral.

Article by BARNABUS PERIWINKLE (Written by Ali)

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[witch weekly]

Witch Weekly

ISSUE 5: June 9th 2025

Owl Post versus Instant Messaging

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As the Ministry continue to champion the passage of the Conversion of Muggle to Magical Artefacts Act, many members of the magical community are embracing the change. New inventions are being put to the Enhancement of Muggle Artefacts Test, and mobile telephones and Muggle computers are becoming increasingly common. But will the Owl Post Office go the way of the Golden Snidget?

Here are some pros and cons of owl post versus instant messaging:


Pros of Owl Post

1. It’s efficient.
Owls know how to find their recipients, and they fly to them quickly.

2. You can’t beat a handwritten letter.
…Because you can’t use a quill and ink on a screen. Also, it’s much more personal.

3. Parcel delivery requires it.
Until someone finds a way to link a Summoning Charm to a Muggle device, best of luck getting those dress robes.


Cons of Owl Post

1. Owls deserve rest.
Unless you’re an Animagus delivering your own letters, those engaged in the promotion of owl welfare would note that flying long distances isn’t particularly healthy for our feathered friends.

2. Owl droppings.
Need we say more? The Ministry use interdepartmental memos for a reason.

3. Even the fastest owl can’t fly in an instant.
And the Ministry might have a word with you if you try.


Pros of Instant Messaging

1. It’s quick.
Why wait around for days for a message? With an instant message, you certainly won’t have to!

2. Location is no barrier.
Want to communicate with someone across the world? You can reach anyone without worrying that they’re too far away for your beloved owl.

3. It’s fashionable.
Even if it doesn’t last, it’s certainly the latest trend!


Cons of Instant Messaging

1. It’s not so common… yet.
Many individuals and businesses have yet to purchase inventions capable of such technology, while owls are everywhere.

2. It’s complicated.
We’d be yanking your wand if we said that there isn’t a learning curve, especially if you never took Muggle Studies.

3. It’s possibly too convenient.
Reaching anyone, anywhere, and at any time might sound like a great idea until you’ve had one firewhisky too many…

Article by BARNABUS PERIWINKLE (Written by Audrey)

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[witch weekly]

Witch Weekly

ISSUE 5: June 9th 2025

No spell for that yet?

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Living amongst fellow wizards has its charms – after all, haven’t we all experienced the discomforts of magical travel or ever had the need to simply pop over to the neighbor’s for a quick refill of Pepperup Potion?

But is there something missing from that formula? Are we depriving ourselves of opportunities to experience the joys and practicality of something more?

Muggle technology has truly jumped leaps and bounds since the introduction of the International Statute of Secretary in 1692. Dexter Manuality, noted Muggle researcher, confirms that “Muggles continuously discover new and creative innovations to replace magic in non-magical contexts. They have established a functional way of life completely devoid of magic. You can’t miss what you never had, after all.”

From information technology to vast underground and aerial networks of transportation, Muggle technology often surpasses established limits within the wizarding community.

Notably, messaging has become instantaneous with the introduction of new forms of communication, and Muggles have no need to rely on owl post or the skill required for a Patronus charm. Indeed, new webs of communication have formed globally across Muggle areas to connect far-flung areas with little to no wait at all.

Muggle medicine has also undergone rapid transformations with the evolution of diagnostic technology (such as the wonderful “X-ray” to see inside the body) or unheard-of techniques like “stitches” which reportedly sews the skin back together after a wound.

Would not the magical world benefit from understanding how our Muggle counterparts have evolved without the use of magic? Would it not ease the lives of those less able to keep pace – perhaps allowing Squibs or non-wand-carrier subgroups a level of previously unknown integration into wizarding society?

And what exactly are wizards missing from our self-imposed isolation from Muggles? Are there remedies or solutions to wizarding problems that remain hidden because of our inability to view Muggles as our equals?

Article by BARNABUS PERIWINKLE (Written by jenny)

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