Owl Think of a Pun Eventually (Raphael)

[brody christopher dubois]

Late August 2028

Working at a specialty shop for and related to owls, although not everyone's idea of a good time, was a perfect fit for Brody. Between his affinity for owls and his own experience with his family's background as owlet trainers at home in the United States, he had no problems at all at Eeylops. Occasionally, it got a little frustrating to deal with customers who weren't as used to caring for owls, but his main responsibilities were to the birds themselves.

Sometimes, the customers didn't seem to grasp that Eeylops didn't do absolutely everything pertaining to owls. They didn't have Magizoologists working there, nor could they do anything to help the speed at which the Owl Post Office made its deliveries. That seemed to be the case when Brody was relayed the message that he was needed for a house call at some flat in Horizont Alley. What he was being asked to do definitely seemed like it was outside the scope of his usual work, but he wasn't going to fight it if someone had decided that it was what he needed to be doing. The last thing he needed was to lose his job and have to go back home.

While he knew a thing or two about owls, Brody was still apprehensive as he made his way to the front door of the flat he was supposed to be visiting. There was a chance that he was being set up, potentially. Though he didn't think of himself as an inherently paranoid person, he had gone through what people like Elaine Dupree could do. Still, he knocked at the door and waited.

Raphael Caelan McLaggen

[Raphael Caelan McLaggen]

Late August 2028

“Come on, Callie. Just one treat?” Cheese begged, gingerly opening the door to the owl cage and offering a whole array of (disgusting to him, but supposedly appealing treats for birds) to his beloved barn owl. But she just hooted weakly and tucked her head back under her wing. Okay, so definitely giving him the cold shoulder. Rafe had thought, for the first couple days at least, that he’d just accidentally offended his owl. Calliope was famously sensitive after all, constantly preening herself and checking her reflection in her water bowl. So maybe he’d just gone too long without giving her a compliment, or she’d heard him talking about someone else and assumed it was about her.

But after the first couple days of the silent treatment, Cheese had started to notice a couple loose feathers on the floor of her cage and the lethargic way she flew around the alley before returning to his window. His barn owl was definitely feeling under the weather, and he’d tried to diagnose the problem himself for a while without success. But she wouldn’t eat much, and then she’d started to hoot irritably at his roommates whenever they came barging into his room (which happened pretty often if someone needed to borrow or hide something). But Rafe had a problem. It wasn’t a simple matter of walking into Eeylops to get a diagnosis and treatment, because he’d gotten himself banned last year. It was a long story, but the gist of it – it was definitely Brígh’s fault.

So anyway, he’d called the store and tried to deepen his voice while asking if they could send someone to make a house call. Nobody had called his bluff, so Cheese flopped down on his bed and kicked his feet while he waited. He stared worriedly at Callie but didn’t move until he heard one of his roommates chanting his name. Ducking his head out the door, he gave them a hurried pat on the back to say thanks and then skidded to a stop by the door. He tried to place where he'd seen the other guy before, because his face was definitely familiar, but a name didn't come up right away. “Hi,” he said breathlessly, “Are you the, er, owl guy?”

brody christopher dubois

[brody christopher dubois]

Late August 2028

"Hi. Are you the, er, owl guy?"

The person who ultimately answered the door was a young man whom Brody remembered as having been an older Hufflepuff at Hogwarts, as well as a fellow member of their House Quidditch team. It had been a while since he had last seen him, not since before the fire, but Brody was pretty sure that the young man's name was McLaggen. From the standpoint of not knowing at whose residence he was showing up, having someone about his own age and whom he recognized from Hogwarts standing opposite him was pretty good. It took away the likelihood that he was going to be putting himself in danger.

"Uh, yeah. I'm here from Eeylops?" Brody said. As much as he wanted to sound sure of himself, all that he was pretty sure about was that he sounded like he didn't know what he was doing. He had never made a house call for an owl, and he didn't remember seeing that in his job description.

Maybe he should have gotten himself a sign to label himself as the "owl guy", Brody thought. It would have been appropriate. He had heard No-Majes call people "whisperers" for various types of animals. He wasn't sure if he could be considered an "owl whisperer", but he wasn't sure if he qualified for that title.

He hadn't been given much information about why he was supposed to be there, so he hoped that McLaggen could fill him in. Either that, or he'd have to see what seemed to be the problem and go from there.

Raphael Caelan McLaggen

[Raphael Caelan McLaggen]

There were a couple seconds of awkward silence while they stared at each other until Cheese finally asked if he was the owl guy. But really, who else could it have been? He’d only called Eeylops a short while ago and they lived right off Horizont Alley so it wasn’t a long commute, even by non-magical standards. And anyway, Puff Palace was sort of a constant revolving door of roommates and couch-surfers, so most people who knew the set-up didn’t even really knock anymore. So that meant that Cheese felt a little stupid for asking such an obvious question, but he still let the silence dangle while he waited for an answer. Owl Guy confirmed that he was indeed the owl guy, so Cheese let out a relieved sigh and nodded. “Brilliant, come on in. Er, sorry about the mess.”

Because honestly, the first two things that most people noticed about Puff Palace was the yellow and the chaos. The yellow because the flat was plastered in Hufflepuff memorabilia, from the pendants on the walls to the life-sized badger stuffed animal on the couch – and the chaos because it definitely looked like a handful of former students lived here. Eli brought strange things home from work all the time – at least, Cheese hoped that the nest of Quaffle-sized eggs on the coffee table was his – and there were broomsticks and photography equipment and clothes thrown everywhere. It could be a shock to someone who was seeing it for the first time, and it was definitely something he apologized for somewhat regularly.

There was something about seeing Owl Guy surrounded by so much Hufflepuff yellow that jogged something in Rafe’s brain, and he blinked in realization. “Oh yeah, you’re…Brody?” It hadn’t been that long since Hogwarts, really, but Cheese had gotten sort of overwhelmed by graduation and the real world and it took a second to remember facts that were just on the tip of his tongue. But yeah, this guy had definitely been a younger Hufflepuff a couple years below him, and he even had vague memories of flying by him on a broomstick. Cheese shuffled by a card house somebody had made with their Exploding Snap set and left in the middle of the floor, released his breath once he’d safely passed it, and then gestured down the hallway. “Er, it’s my owl. She’s been a bit out of sorts lately.”

brody christopher dubois

[brody christopher dubois]

Late August 2028

McLaggen invited him into the flat and apologized for the mess inside, which Brody shrugged off. Spending any length of time around owls was messier than most people preferred, and he had seen plenty from working at Eeylops alone. He didn't care what things were like inside the flat, as long as they weren't contributing to whatever the problem was with the owl he had come to check on.

The flat's condition wasn't anywhere near as bad as Brody was expecting based on McLaggen's comment; it just looked like a bunch of young people lived there. That was probably true. The aesthetic was very much that of the former Hufflepuff Common Room crossed with a first apartment, but it was honestly cozy like that. It was definitely familiar and welcoming, and Brody didn't see any immediate concerns with the living environment for an owl. There were a few random objects on the floor, but it wouldn't be too bad with a few household spells.

As they were walking, McLaggen remembered his name, asking if he was Brody. Brody nodded his head. "Yeah, I am."

"Er, it's my owl," McLaggen added after they had made their way around a house of cards at their feet. "She's been a bit out of sorts lately."

"Is it just behavioral? Dietary changes? Or something else?" Brody began to run down the list of what might have been wrong with his owl, curious to see for himself.

Raphael Caelan McLaggen

[Raphael Caelan McLaggen]

Cheese thought over the questions as he led Brody down the hallway. He stopped outside his door, but didn’t move to open it right away. Because really, he wanted to speak frankly about Callie’s condition and that was somewhat impossible to do when his own was in earshot. She was quite sensitive to remarks that could be taken as an insult, and she looked bad enough already. “Well, she’s been low-energy. Only takes a few swoops around outside before she comes back. And she’s not eating. Which is strange, ‘cause,” he lowered his voice to absolutely ensure they couldn’t be overheard, “She’s got quite a healthy appetite usually. But she won’t hunt and she doesn’t eat what I leave her.”

That was what really worried him. If she was just a bit tired, that would be one thing. But he’d been leaving her food for a couple days and she’d give him an indignant expression and then turn around. Cheese thought he’d gotten used to her moods, but that had hurt him a little. Then it’d slowly been turning into worry as the behavior continued over two days. “Anyway, she’s right through here.” With that, he opened the door and led the way into his cramped room. It was a bit tight, especially considering how big he was, but he loved his room. The laundry hamper besides the door was full to bursting, but besides that he thought he had a good system. His Quidditch things in one corner, photography equipment on the desk, and his laptop was still open on his bed where he’d been messing around with a new shot for the Prophet.

And then of course, Callie was in her cage. She hadn’t turned around when he came in, but Rafe still crossed the room to her anyway. “There’s someone to see you. Brody, Calliope. Callie, say hi.” He hadn’t expected anything to happen, but he still shrugged at Brody. “So, er, you need to see anything else?”

brody christopher dubois

[brody christopher dubois]

Late August 2028

Brody followed Raphael until they were standing outside of a closed door in the hallway of the flat. From the context, Brody guessed that the owl he was there to see was beyond the door itself, which seemed to be the case as Raphael continued to speak to him. "Well," he started, "she's been low-energy. Only takes a few swoops around outside before she comes back." Brody nodded, and Raphael continued. "And she's not eating. Which is strange, 'cause"—Raphael lowered his voice to explain that the owl normally ate well, which confused Brody momentarily. She hadn't been hunting, he said, or eating what he had been giving her to eat. For Brody, that seemed like a good indication that the owl was dehydrated, but he would need to see for himself.

"Anyway, she's right through here," Raphael told him, and they entered the room. It must have been his bedroom; there was no doubt about that. The room itself wasn't very spacious, though it was enough room for the owl to fly around a little bit, if she so desired.

The barn owl, though, was caged, and she didn't seem to notice their entrance. Raphael, on the other hand, didn't sound outwardly bothered as they approached the bird. "There’s someone to see you. Brody, Calliope. Callie, say hi." Calliope didn't greet them in return, and Raphael shrugged. "So, er, you need to see anything else?"

"Hmm. Just a sec," Brody mused to Raphael. He turned his attention to Calliope and addressed her himself. "Hi there, Calliope," he spoke to the owl, talking to her as though she were an old friend—and a human rather than a bird, at that. "I hear you're not eating, huh?"

"What do you normally feed her?" he then checked with Raphael, almost in the same breath. He wasn't a Magizoologist and didn't have any sort of veterinary supplies, but one thing that he did know was how to communicate with owls at a level beyond that of most other humans.

Raphael Caelan McLaggen

[Raphael Caelan McLaggen]

Cheese stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked over his owl rather worriedly. Her cage wasn’t anything fancy, but he’d added a few extra touches to his room over the years as he discovered what she liked. There were a few different perches, plus a water bowl and a separate dish for her food. There was a towel spread out just underneath the window to catch whatever dead things Calliope liked to bring back from her hunts, and there was a stuffed carrot that she liked to play with sometimes on his dresser. All in all, it seemed like a pretty normal set-up -- he loved his owl, but he wasn't one of those helicopter pet owners that insisted on feeding five galleon gold-plated pate or something. Brody moved forward to study the owl, so Cheese stepped to the side and nudged a discarded elbow pad that he’d left lying on the ground (that was one of the nice things about a neighborhood Quidditch league – he could try out all the different positions on the team).

“Oh, these owl pellets usually,” Cheese replied hastily as Brody turned back to ask about Callie’s diet. He looked around his room, spotted the bag, and showed the label to Brody. He’d picked it up in Hogsmeade the last time he’d gone to visit Dicky, along with the stuffed carrot he'd seen in the window. “I just follow the instructions on the back, one scoopful for every meal. And obviously she hunts pretty regularly too. Dunno what she eats while she’s out.” Was he supposed to know? Cheese had always taken a hands-off approach with his owl. She delivered his post, of course, but besides that – he let her do as she liked. There weren't any rules really about when she could go out or anything. His mum had tried that whenever he'd come home from school, since she didn't like the thought of owls in her garden, but it'd been ages since those days. And of course, Cheese did talk to her sometimes, mostly when he wanted to work out problems out-loud, even if she seemed rather neutral about the whole thing. She certainly never said anything back (thank goodness for that).

brody christopher dubois