1 step forward, 3 steps back | juniper

[rhys alexander greyback]

the rollercoaster's

ALL I'VE EVER HAD

January 18, 2024
juniper minerva mcgonagall

Twitchy. What the hell did that mean? The heat in Rhys’ cheat had not left since he’d snapped at Ioan before leaving the museum. Hours had passed, and only now did Rhys help himself to a glass of water in his kitchen. In his…mood, Rhys hardly recognized Ioan was not at fault. Another assistant archivist who’d read about Cursebreaking pushed the usual boundaries. The lines his comments toed, naturally, marked the borders of Rhys’ patience, especially regarding his lineage, his name, and the full moon. But once the bloody idiot mentioned Saffron, the rest of that patience allowed Rhys to leave the vicinity lest any priceless artifacts bear the brunt of Rhys’s temper.

It happened from time to time. Juni was none the wiser, as far as Rhys knew. The Tournament kept her working hours inconsistent but heavy. He wondered how their schedules had suddenly switched. For the most part, the timing worked in his favor. Less fighting on such days, she’d return to her flat rather than here, and Rhys had nothing to explain regarding the bags under his eyes or how he tossed, turned, and even thrashed in his sleep. Not to mention Rhys’ frustration because his senses were failing him. All week, he’d jump every time Ioan managed to appear next to him, loudly speaking as if he’d just apparated and raised Rhys’ blood pressure. It was strange like someone had grabbed his shirt and thrown him back on the Earth without warning.

It was more likely to happen with Juni since her footsteps were lighter, as was her voice most of the time in comparison. Rhys wasn’t sure he’d hid that part all that well. Placing the empty glass on the counter, the sound echoed in his brain momentarily. The firewhiskey numbed him some, that foggy feeling returning. The comfortable place where he didn’t feel pain or anything at all. While his eyes focused on the glass, Rhys didn’t think about the shoes he’d passed near the door. Clearly too small for him, the jacket hanging off the sofa or the movement in the bedroom. He didn’t hear his name through the muffled white noise. But when Rhys felt something touch him, his ears rang, and his name reached his ears.

Immediately tensing, Rhys turned. His arm shooting the glass off the countertop. ”Merlin—“ The glass shattered, although landing far from the pair. Rhys felt like he’d sprinted out of a collapsing tomb, his heart beating rapidly against his ribcage. After what felt like a long time, Rhys registered Juni, his flat, and the broken glass. ”Shit—get away from the glass.” Rhys’s brow furrowed as he picked up his wand and (probably a little more forcefully than intended) ordered Juni behind him. Just what he needed. Broken fucking glass.

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[juniper minerva mcgonagall]

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A little over a month remained until the second task of the Triwizard Tournament was set to begin. With the relatively normal Yule Ball now behind her, all focus had been shifted towards the deadline at the end of February. Juniper was exhausted. Her Christmas break had not been relaxing at all, with her boss owling her constantly through it and more than once asking her to come into the office despite there being nothing to currently do. Something about ‘making sure all of the paperwork was in order’. She had no clue what that meant, but it was apparent that whatever the second task was, it was going to require quite a bit of it. Some of the things that had crossed her desk involved various levels of portkey travel and permits for live magical creatures. Nothing completely new, considering the first task had also utilized similar things, but this was on a far grander scale. Why this was being put in front of her was definitely a question she had, considering her job was about creating and grading exams. Not certifying transport of a murtlap colony. That was absurd, in her opinion.

On days where stress got the best of her, she went straight home. Avoiding the complicated conversations with Rhys made things a lot easier, and they seemed to have an agreement that it still wasn’t time to engage in broiling talks hot off the clock. Once the tournament was over and things calmed down (or she found a new job that she desperately needed), then she didn’t have a problem with going straight to his place. Everything had been better now that he was working at the museum. There seemed to still be the light that he had when he was cursebreaking, and this was infinitely safer. Ioan aside, of course.

Today, she had gone straight to his flat though. It had been a better day, despite some of the odd paperwork she had to deal with, and since she was going to be busy over the weekend, getting to see Rhys before then seemed like a good idea. When she got inside, she realized she had beat him home, and went about organizing some of her things in the bedroom that she had started to leave there once again. It was strange, almost like she had stepped back in time six years, to when she had first done this. Back when her parents were abjectly against her moving out. Good times.

Hearing the door open, she called Rhys’s name over her shoulder but didn’t get a response. Not entirely uncommon, as the way the apartment was shaped, voices tended to not be heard at the front door from the bedroom. Sticking her head out into the living room, she saw that he was already in the kitchen, sink tap running water. She was clearly out of practice of being able to feel the tension that radiated off of him as she approached, tapping his arm from behind and immediately watching the glass on the countertop fly onto the floor. The shattering of the glass echoed, and she stared at him wide-eyed momentarily, knowing that it was partially her fault for not announcing she was right there. Obviously, he hadn’t heard her call when he walked in.

Dutifully stepping around him, careful not to step on any glass shards, Juniper chewed on her lower lip as she watched him start to clean everything up with his wand. The more she thought about it, that was a hell of a reaction. She hated that her first thought was that something was wrong. ”I can help…” she said as she fished her wand out of her pocket and pointed it around their feet just in case any pieces got close to them. ”Sorry for sneaking up on you…I thought you’d heard in the bedroom.”

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[rhys alexander greyback]

the rollercoaster's

ALL I'VE EVER HAD

January 18, 2024
juniper minerva mcgonagall

It was everywhere. Broken glass all over the place. Rhys sent the fragments into the bin, focusing on pieces that might have traveled the farthest distances. ”I got it.” He grumbled, capturing the small flecks near their feet. Merlin knew he’d find a small shard or two in the living room at some point. One of those instances where he’d plop on the couch at just the right angle where the light caught his eye. That observant eye, trained through years in the field, and yet he hadn’t avoided this. Rhys felt further annoyed. What was wrong with him? Hardly six months in the museum, and suddenly, his senses were dull and unrefined like some trainee.

The indescribable energy in his core sought some kind of exit. Like children who needed to run off a sugar high. Rhys heard the apology. ”I didn’t.” He hadn’t heard anything after walking in. The urge to retrieve a new glass and the whiskey rose, but Rhys stopped himself. An old memory of Juni’s old eye-roll and scoff, non-verbally announcing her disapproval, entered his mind. It wasn’t even a recent memory, but it might as well have happened that moment. ”What are you even doing here? It's Thursday.” Rhys stepped back to lean on the counter, rubbing his hands over his face while letting out a heavy sigh. ”You’re never here Thursdays…” He mumbled the additional observation.

In a way, things were slowly moving in his head, like blocks sliding into place as he deciphered the scene, the people, and what had just happened. Why couldn’t he keep up? Why couldn’t his brain keep up? Ever since his accident, he felt this, and the thought that whatever had occurred was that life-changing was awful. It made even more so because Rhys still hadn’t a clue what happened, and neither did Sharp.

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[juniper minerva mcgonagall]

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Juniper pocketed her wand at his annoyance; she knew it wasn’t her, and more so the mistake of knocking the glass onto the floor. She wouldn’t have held back her words either if she had been the one to do instead. Aside from the danger that the now shattered drinking glass posed, it was maddening how many pieces it could turn into in the flash of a second. Watching the pieces plucked up with magic and floated over to the bin, she continued to chew on her lip, feeling momentarily helpless and afraid of moving, in case a stray shard decided to put itself directly into her foot. Healing charms to fix it instantly aside, she really didn’t want the momentary pain or to have to add to the list of spells cast tonight. Cleaning up blood from a sock was not as easy as it should be.

Clearly something was up, because Rhys’s tone was not what she was used to, especially as of late. It felt accusatory, being charged the way she suddenly was because she happened to want to see him on a Thursday instead of a Saturday. Why did she have a key again if he didn’t want her to come by? Blinking a few times at him in shock as he rubbed at his face, Juniper started to formulate the best way to navigate this. She hadn’t smelled alcohol yet, so she wasn’t sure if it was that on top of a bad day. But she also hadn’t been right up in his face either, the broken glass preventing that.

”I’m away all weekend for work, remember? I said I was going to come either Thursday or Friday instead…” She did tell him, right? Now she was second guessing herself. Work stress had a great way of making her forget these sorts of conversations. Which totally wasn’t healthy, but that was beside the point right now. ”Is everything okay?” Juniper finally asked, reaching up to try and hold onto one of his hands. He definitely didn’t look like he was all there. Maybe she should have sent a text beforehand. Then at least the glass wouldn’t have fallen…

rhys alexander greyback ● 363 ● Song by Artist

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[rhys alexander greyback]

the rollercoaster's

ALL I'VE EVER HAD

January 18, 2024
juniper minerva mcgonagall

Rhys was pretty certain the glass was taken care of. He’d have to replace the glass. Dammit. Just another thing to add to the list of things he had to take care of. Rhys’s life felt busier than before, somehow more tedious. It didn’t make sense. Feeling a strange sensation in his chest, Rhys inhaled. Breathe. That had always happened since childhood; he had to remind himself to breathe sometimes. Usually, when his mind was very far away. Breathing brought him back to the present, although whatever Rhys drudged up while mentally far away lingered.

Work was awful. He couldn’t stand it on these days. The way some of the older museum employees looked at him. Something in their eyes brought Rhys back to his boyhood in the orphanage and other years at school. The longer Rhys spent at Merlin’s, the more he felt he didn’t belong. Juniper reminded Rhys that she had told him about her schedule. Had she told him? It was all likely true, and Rhys had pushed that far off into the corner of his mind. ”Right…right—sorry.” Rhys closed his eyes, trying to shake it off. And then he felt her hand slip into his.

Something about his current state left his senses heightened. Her hands were always soft and small, fitting neatly into his own. A reminder she was here, and so was he. The question, however, hit him differently. Touching a nerve, Rhys didn’t know existed. ”Merlin—why does everyone keep bloody asking me that?” He scoffed, annoyed. At this rate, Rhys would need to borrow her hand to count how many people had asked him some variation of that question. Releasing Juni’s hand, he began to leave the kitchen. ”I’m fine—it was just a glass.” The whiskey wasn’t here anyway.

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[juniper minerva mcgonagall]

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She was starting to put the pieces together slowly, ironic considering it took a glass to shatter at their feet to do so. Unfortunately she had experience in knowing that when Rhys got like this, it was related to his work. Whether or not it was problems with the museum or with the bank attempting to get him back and into the field again, she wasn’t sure. But she had seen this kind of mood before. Obviously, she didn’t like it. It somehow ended up with her as the bad guy because of the words she chose. Mostly because the way she went about things was a lot more direct and straightforward, never really choosing to mince what she said. Holding her tongue in the moment, when it felt like he was being relatively rude to her for something that was never going to be her fault, was tough. If there was anything to have learned from the first round of their relationship, it was when to know when she could give her unsolicited advice, and when he needed time to think on his own. Juniper was positive this was the latter.

And she fully intended to do that, until he let go of her hand and started to walk away, upset that she would even ask that question. She didn’t care about the glass; they both knew it wasn’t about the glass. That was merely a consequence of him being worked up and her accidentally scaring him. It was irrelevant now that it was cleaned up. ”Rhys, come on,” she half-pleaded, knowing that there was a fine line that she needed to toe now. Leaving and going home would make it seem like she was upset at him, and she didn’t want it to be. She would only go if he asked at this point. ”I’m asking out of concern. The glass doesn’t even matter, you know that,” Juniper waved it off. She carefully followed him, making sure to watch her every step, in case a stray piece of glass appeared. ”If its about work, you can vent all you want. I’ll listen…” It was worth a shot, she supposed.

rhys alexander greyback ● 361 ● Song by Artist

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[rhys alexander greyback]

the rollercoaster's

ALL I'VE EVER HAD

January 18, 2024
juniper minerva mcgonagall

Anxiety and anger mixed horribly. Unfortunately for Rhys, this was the situation. Not that he could recognize how his brain constantly backed him into these corners. It was easy to write off a Cursebreaker’s behavior as simply habits of fieldwork or a typical temperament thing. Don’t mind him. He’s always looking over his shoulder—like some cursed mummy is about to jump from around the corner. Rhys tried his best to remain in the present. His flat, on a Thursday with his girlfriend. But all his senses told him he was somewhere else entirely, somewhere unsafe.

Rhys scoffed again. ”Doesn’t it?” He didn’t notice how deep his nails dug into his palms. Juni’s voice came through. There was that tone. The one that he knew so well. Did she think he wanted to act like this? What was everyone’s problem, he didn’t understand. ”Everytime I fucking turn around, someone is asking me, ‘is everything okay?’” Rhys stopped near his desk, where he’d last left the bottle of whiskey from the day prior. ”So what if I didn’t hear them the first time or I dropped a bloody glass. I’m fine.” A tightness began to grow in his chest.

Shaking his head, Rhys ran his hands over his face again as keeping them busy stopped them from trembling or twitching. Work. She always asked about Work. Ever since they first held jobs—Work was all she asked about. ”Work…” Picking up the bottle, he was alarmed at the weight—or lack thereof. Of course. The bottle was empty. He returned it to the desk. ”Its always about Work…” A pressure built up inside of him, and he turned to face her more. ”What do you want from me? I’m not in the field anymore—isn’t that what you wanted?” And what did he have to show for it? An empty fucking bottle of whiskey. So much more waited on the tip of his tongue, but everything felt stuck in the doorway, like too many people trying to leave through the same exit. Enough sanity remained that Rhys knew to take a step back. And even when it didn’t, how Juni looked at him told him enough. ”I need to go.” Where? Who knew? At least somewhere he could start with a drink.

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[juniper minerva mcgonagall]

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Her concern was starting to bubble higher because she honestly had no idea what was going on. It definitely felt like it was stemming from his work, but with the way he got during these instances, trying to wring out an answer was never going to happen. Once upon a time, she would have gotten upset in return. Take personal offense to his accusations and try to argue her case that none of this was her fault to begin with, so taking it out on her was beyond unreasonable. Trying to break through to him felt futile. And with him heading towards what looked to be a bottle of whiskey, she was afraid it was going to devolve into one of those kinds of days. The drinking never helped, aside from knocking him out cold. But she also never wanted to be seen as controlling. Too many people in school had thought of her as that, despite never knowing a single thing about her. Rhys did though, and he wasn't entirely wrong by saying she always pestered him about work. It was part of what ended things last time.

She hadn't pestered him about it since he started at the museum though. There was no point to it, after all. He was safe, had normal hours, and seemed happy. Clearly that wasn't the case today. Watching him place the empty bottle down, Juniper remained hovering by the door to the kitchen. Rhys needed the space. "I just-" Just what? Wanted to make sure things were okay? That he still had a job? It was a sore subject apparently. To be frank, she was honestly tired that it always came down to his job. Getting angry over something he could leave if he didn't want to stay. It was the same as him not walking away from fights. So she stopped herself from saying anything else that would be twisted into her arguing about his job, even if that wasn't what she was doing.

He declared that he had to leave, right then, and Juniper stared at him. "Fine. Go," she stated, exasperated. "I'll be back Sunday night and won't have my phone until then," Juniper added as she crossed the apartment to get her bag of clothes that she needed to bring back to her own place. She really didn't need to be dealing with this right now. Not with a weekend full of dealing with her coworkers in front of her.

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