Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2018 18:24:00 GMT -7
Summer 1964; Massachusetts, USA
”Clear your mind, boy. Make it as void of thought as possible.”
Clarence could only think of everything that he had to surrender. Generations of stories, of memories, of histories—his own and those of his people… Everything that they had accomplished and everything for which they still had to fight… Language… Culture… He had to remind himself that it was only temporary; those memories wouldn’t be taken from him.
“I…” He hesitated but didn’t give in. Rather, he closed his eyes in an attempt to concentrate on nothing. Nothingness. He had to be stronger, sturdier, so that nothing could influence him. Breathing in, he waited for something to happen.
A few more lessons passed before Clarence was able to block out his professor’s Legilimency with any success. The more he tried it, the more being told to clear his mind became less daunting. That compartmentalization, he realized, would serve him well. Even the Wampus cat was said to be capable of performing Legilimency, after all.
The harder he tried, too, the less he felt violated. The first time that he had tried to perform Occlumency, he was sure that he had felt his professor’s presence in his mind. He was also sure that his memories had been left unaltered after the fact, but—in the moment—he hadn’t known. It was as though his mind was nothing more than a file cabinet for anyone’s perusal, and his being made uncomfortable by that feeling was what kept him going.
Finally able to say that he felt prepared for his lesson, he stood in front of his professor again. Weeks of trying had led him there. His eyes met those of the older man, their gazes locked. “I’m ready, sir,” he spoke. The conviction was present in his voice as he stood there. Instead of waiting for his professor to act, as he had before, Clarence was already in the process of making his mind blank.
This time, he was not met with the sensation that his thoughts were being penetrated. It was only his professor’s smile that clued him in that something had happened.
“Very good, young man. Very good.”
Clarence could only think of everything that he had to surrender. Generations of stories, of memories, of histories—his own and those of his people… Everything that they had accomplished and everything for which they still had to fight… Language… Culture… He had to remind himself that it was only temporary; those memories wouldn’t be taken from him.
“I…” He hesitated but didn’t give in. Rather, he closed his eyes in an attempt to concentrate on nothing. Nothingness. He had to be stronger, sturdier, so that nothing could influence him. Breathing in, he waited for something to happen.
A few more lessons passed before Clarence was able to block out his professor’s Legilimency with any success. The more he tried it, the more being told to clear his mind became less daunting. That compartmentalization, he realized, would serve him well. Even the Wampus cat was said to be capable of performing Legilimency, after all.
The harder he tried, too, the less he felt violated. The first time that he had tried to perform Occlumency, he was sure that he had felt his professor’s presence in his mind. He was also sure that his memories had been left unaltered after the fact, but—in the moment—he hadn’t known. It was as though his mind was nothing more than a file cabinet for anyone’s perusal, and his being made uncomfortable by that feeling was what kept him going.
Finally able to say that he felt prepared for his lesson, he stood in front of his professor again. Weeks of trying had led him there. His eyes met those of the older man, their gazes locked. “I’m ready, sir,” he spoke. The conviction was present in his voice as he stood there. Instead of waiting for his professor to act, as he had before, Clarence was already in the process of making his mind blank.
This time, he was not met with the sensation that his thoughts were being penetrated. It was only his professor’s smile that clued him in that something had happened.
“Very good, young man. Very good.”
