Post by parvati patil macmillan on Feb 19, 2020 18:36:22 GMT -7
CW: Indirect references to psychological trauma
June 2025
To Parvati, it seemed as though it had been ages since she had spent much time at all with her mother. Her work at Hogwarts and her responsibilities to Ouroboros kept her free time minimal, and it was frankly draining to spend much time with her parents. (That wasn't to say that she didn't love her mother and father; she did, but there was plenty that she still kept from them. Even after so many years, they didn't need to know every detail of her life.)
The flat that she had continued to let in Hogsmeade felt like less of a home to her than her living quarters at the castle. She certainly didn't entertain guests there, and it was more of a chore than a pleasure.
Doing dishes for the sake of having tea probably would have been quicker had she used magic for all of it, but it was about the same amount of effort either way. Parvati stood at the sink, hands gripping a plate with a towel as she dried it.
"Parvati?"
She turned her attention towards her mother, who sat at the table nearby. As she did, the plate slipped from her hands, crashed to the floor, and smashed into pieces at her feet. "Merlin," Parvati muttered, shaking her head at herself for what she had done, however accidental. Fortunately, the shards of china were larger, none had injured her bare feet, and it was easily fixed.
Careful not to step on the broken plate, she took up her wand and brought the pieces back together again as though they had never been damaged.
"What's wrong?"
Parvati shook her head. She knew that it wasn't the dropped plate that was her mother's concern. "It's nothing. I'm just… a bit worried about Savtaj," she answered truthfully, picking up the repaired plate from the floor and placing it on the counter with her wand. It wasn't often that she bared her soul to her mother. Her sister or her friends were more likely to be the ones listening to her insecurities.
"…About Savtaj?" her mother echoed her. "Why?"
"His playing Quidditch," she continued with a sigh. It wasn't his playing the sport, in and of itself, that concerned her. It was everything else along with it, including that he had focused more on his athletics than on his academics throughout school. It was that he seemed to be getting in over his head with his career choice—or at least that he didn't seem to have a plan in place in the event that something happened.
"Of course I'm happy for him. I'm proud of him," she continued emphatically, pacing back towards the table. Sav was playing for Puddlemere United, one of the most popular teams in the league. "It's been his dream since he was barely old enough for a broomstick, but…" Encouraging her children to follow their dreams had been part and parcel with her role as a mother, but what happened when their dreams didn't align with her expectations? Parvati moved back in the direction of the sink, shaking her head. "You hear things, don't you, about Quidditch players getting into… lifestyles that they shouldn't, and all of that."
There was also the aspect of parenting that meant teaching her children to be able to function as adults. By all indications, Parvati had succeeded there, but she was having difficulty with feeling as though they were pulling too far away from her.
Sav's choice to stay with Hugo at Christmas probably had been easier than trying to balance separate celebrations with her and with Ernie. She couldn't blame him for that. If things were different between her and his father, though, then maybe he wouldn't have felt the need.
"I know he's eager to start his own life," Parvati went on, "but I can't help but feel like I've done something wrong." No matter how much Sav assured her to the contrary, it was just so hard to believe that she hadn't messed up enough for him to hold it against her.
"Because he's like you?"
Parvati—silent—realized that her mother's question had been rhetorical. She couldn't lie; it stung. Her mother could see what she couldn't: that perhaps the reason why she always felt at odds with Sav wasn't because of their differences but because of their similarities.
On the face of it, she and Sav were hardly alike. Their interests were divergent at best, considering how much his life revolved around Quidditch. Yet she realized that it was no secret from where he had gotten his stubbornness. That maybe Sav wasn't so combative because of Ernie.
"When you and Dad tried to stop Padma and me from returning to Hogwarts after what happened to Katie Bell, I swore that I'd never do that to my own children…" Parvati breathed, shaking her head. It wasn't anything that her mother hadn't heard from her before, or she wouldn't have said it.
"And you would have done the same thing," her mother assured her, "to protect them."
It was too hard to think of what she might have done had any number of things not happened as they had. Parvati was grateful that she worked at Hogwarts and that she had been there for the last few years of her children's educations. "I fought in a war at their age, Mummy," she reminded her. "Everything that I've put them through… I should be ecstatic that my son is doing what he's always wanted…" Never mind that her children were alive, a thought that she considered but didn't voice aloud. "I'm terrible, aren't I?" And she and her friends wondered why they could barely keep their lives together.
Played characters mentioned: @sav and @hugo
The flat that she had continued to let in Hogsmeade felt like less of a home to her than her living quarters at the castle. She certainly didn't entertain guests there, and it was more of a chore than a pleasure.
Doing dishes for the sake of having tea probably would have been quicker had she used magic for all of it, but it was about the same amount of effort either way. Parvati stood at the sink, hands gripping a plate with a towel as she dried it.
"Parvati?"
She turned her attention towards her mother, who sat at the table nearby. As she did, the plate slipped from her hands, crashed to the floor, and smashed into pieces at her feet. "Merlin," Parvati muttered, shaking her head at herself for what she had done, however accidental. Fortunately, the shards of china were larger, none had injured her bare feet, and it was easily fixed.
Careful not to step on the broken plate, she took up her wand and brought the pieces back together again as though they had never been damaged.
"What's wrong?"
Parvati shook her head. She knew that it wasn't the dropped plate that was her mother's concern. "It's nothing. I'm just… a bit worried about Savtaj," she answered truthfully, picking up the repaired plate from the floor and placing it on the counter with her wand. It wasn't often that she bared her soul to her mother. Her sister or her friends were more likely to be the ones listening to her insecurities.
"…About Savtaj?" her mother echoed her. "Why?"
"His playing Quidditch," she continued with a sigh. It wasn't his playing the sport, in and of itself, that concerned her. It was everything else along with it, including that he had focused more on his athletics than on his academics throughout school. It was that he seemed to be getting in over his head with his career choice—or at least that he didn't seem to have a plan in place in the event that something happened.
"Of course I'm happy for him. I'm proud of him," she continued emphatically, pacing back towards the table. Sav was playing for Puddlemere United, one of the most popular teams in the league. "It's been his dream since he was barely old enough for a broomstick, but…" Encouraging her children to follow their dreams had been part and parcel with her role as a mother, but what happened when their dreams didn't align with her expectations? Parvati moved back in the direction of the sink, shaking her head. "You hear things, don't you, about Quidditch players getting into… lifestyles that they shouldn't, and all of that."
There was also the aspect of parenting that meant teaching her children to be able to function as adults. By all indications, Parvati had succeeded there, but she was having difficulty with feeling as though they were pulling too far away from her.
Sav's choice to stay with Hugo at Christmas probably had been easier than trying to balance separate celebrations with her and with Ernie. She couldn't blame him for that. If things were different between her and his father, though, then maybe he wouldn't have felt the need.
"I know he's eager to start his own life," Parvati went on, "but I can't help but feel like I've done something wrong." No matter how much Sav assured her to the contrary, it was just so hard to believe that she hadn't messed up enough for him to hold it against her.
"Because he's like you?"
Parvati—silent—realized that her mother's question had been rhetorical. She couldn't lie; it stung. Her mother could see what she couldn't: that perhaps the reason why she always felt at odds with Sav wasn't because of their differences but because of their similarities.
On the face of it, she and Sav were hardly alike. Their interests were divergent at best, considering how much his life revolved around Quidditch. Yet she realized that it was no secret from where he had gotten his stubbornness. That maybe Sav wasn't so combative because of Ernie.
"When you and Dad tried to stop Padma and me from returning to Hogwarts after what happened to Katie Bell, I swore that I'd never do that to my own children…" Parvati breathed, shaking her head. It wasn't anything that her mother hadn't heard from her before, or she wouldn't have said it.
"And you would have done the same thing," her mother assured her, "to protect them."
It was too hard to think of what she might have done had any number of things not happened as they had. Parvati was grateful that she worked at Hogwarts and that she had been there for the last few years of her children's educations. "I fought in a war at their age, Mummy," she reminded her. "Everything that I've put them through… I should be ecstatic that my son is doing what he's always wanted…" Never mind that her children were alive, a thought that she considered but didn't voice aloud. "I'm terrible, aren't I?" And she and her friends wondered why they could barely keep their lives together.
Played characters mentioned: @sav and @hugo
