Post by Casimir Elias Karkaroff on Nov 18, 2020 4:29:31 GMT -7
March 2019
It was. Cas and his trainee had only recently returned from their most recent Curse-Breaking assignment, a complicated job in Afghanistan that required evading both the local authorities and other competing treasure-hunters. The dig site had been well-protected, and it had been extraordinarily difficult to find a time when all the workers were off-site in some form – on a coffee break, sleeping, or on leave to visit their families. But Cas had been patient, and working in twos proved to be the ultimate pay-off as Odette had set off a diversion elsewhere while he had dismantled the magical protections prohibiting their entry. Navigating the cave system had been a fairly simple ordeal once the persistent problem of the locals had been dealt with, and the artifact recovery had been smooth and painless after that. Cas and his trainee had triumphantly returned with the idol to Gringotts.
In the end, it was going to be Cas’s last assignment. He’d known that, which probably accounted for some of his stranger behaviors throughout the week. Lingering when he was known to be ruthlessly efficient and unusually nostalgic when that was not his trademark by far. But he’d kept the secret to himself in case something changed, in case some bizarre miracle would happen that would negate the necessity of his departure. Odette had probably attributed his behavior to the knowledge that it was only going to be their last assignment together, not his last one at all. She’d completed her two-year training period, and now it was time for her to begin her own expeditions alone. She had already mentioned an interest in Egypt to him. Ultimately nothing of the sort to save Cas the trouble of resigning had occurred, and now he was sitting in his old mentor’s office presenting his letter of resignation. It was a day Cas had been dreading for weeks, but he knew there was nothing more to do but rip the bandage off and get it done.
Like Cas had been training his own rookie for the last two years, so he had been that assignment once for the old man sitting opposite him on the other side of the desk. Eventually his mentor had decided he was done with fieldwork and transferred to a desk job, long after Cas had finished his own trial period, which was why he was now Cas’s supervisor and peering over the parchment at Cas with a bewildered expression. “I was aware of that when I wrote it,” Cas responded curtly, face carefully blank as he delivered the veiled jab (he wasn’t 17 anymore and had since grown out of mouthing off to most people, but the habit still remained between him and the senior Curse-Breaker). To regain some sense of professionalism, Cas quickly added, “It’s the right time. Odette has finished her training period and I haven’t been assigned any more work yet.” He’d suspected for months that he might be leaving soon, so everything had been carefully arranged on his end. Cas was nothing if not a meticulous planner, and there was no way he would allow the departure from his favorite job to be disrupted.
“But…why?”
Why? Because his family was incompetent at getting anything done without him. Because his mother was driving the Karkaroff name into the ground with increasingly erratic and unpredictable behavior, finishing the job his uncle and his father had started years earlier with their own unfortunate decisions. Because he had one brother who was the family favorite and had allowed all that praise to get to his head and affect his actions to the point of reckless and endangering behavior. And because the other brother had no spine at all and required guidance in every aspect of his life, as committed as he was to the family and his role in it. Because Cas had been free of his family for seven years – seven glorious, exhilarating years – but there had been signs over the last few months that that freedom was coming to an end.
Cas had always known it would only be a matter of time until his mother began to truly unravel. She’d always been weak, on the edge of fragility ever since his father’s very public arrest and trial. Since Oskar had been extradited and shipped off to Azkaban to presumably serve his sentence until his death, Tesia Karkaroff had spent years slowly retreating first into the manor, and then into her room, with no prospect of ever reversing that trend. The older her children had become, especially the oldest, the less responsibility she’d been inclined to take in determining the family’s future or reversing the immense damage Igor and his father had done to their reputation. But even with all her issues, all her weakness, she’d never had a public meltdown before. Not before December of this past year, at least, when she’d attended her sister’s Christmas party and all but pulled her wand out at a guest who’d found the past an interesting enough subject to mention her husband’s less-than-pleasant associations. He’d come to regret that in the moment, but in the end it was the Karkaroffs who were going to suffer most from the public incident. So there had been that breakdown at Christmas, and then again at New Year’s when the family had hosted their own celebration. And, Cas was sure, the incident was going to be repeated at Easter if he didn’t intervene soon.
He couldn’t say any of that to his supervisor, his old mentor, so he shrugged slightly and simply replied, “A unique opportunity has presented itself. I couldn’t say no.” That wasn’t quite how things had gone. The opportunity hadn’t shown itself to Cas; rather, he’d gone hunting for the perfect role to facilitate his transition from world-traveler to something more domestic. Contrary to family expectations, he’d fought against returning to Prague. He might not be able to continue his Curse-Breaking career any longer, but he would never return to that cage willingly, barring the direst of circumstances. But, even having removed the possibility of going home, Cas needed something that gave him easy access to his family while still providing the space he needed. He needed to be able to send regular instructions to them, be easily accessible in the case of emergency, and simply be…stable. Easily found. Able to manage the family’s affairs from a distance.
As loathe as he was to imitate his uncle, Cas couldn’t deny that seeking his fortunes in Britain seemed like the right move to do. Magical innovations meant he could keep a close eye on his siblings and his mother as needed, while still maintaining the distance he craved from them and the toxic pureblood society they belonged to. And England was rife with danger at the moment – danger and therefore opportunity. Money was no longer such an immediate concern for the family, which gave Cas the opportunity to seek his fortunes by other means. Through connections, and creating a network of sources, and using his extensive knowledge of artifacts to establish himself as a fixture of the darker side of the magical world in Britain. He’d ultimately been inspired by his best friend from school, Titus Burke. That branch of the Burkes had left England for Turkey during Voldemort’s reign of terror, but they still had stakes in the United Kingdom and Cas had therefore heard all about it during his time at Durmstrang and then after his graduation, when the UK’s domestic situation slowly began to worsen and destabilize. Titus had mentioned his family’s investment in the store along with the Borgin family, and Cas had been curious enough to look into the shop further as a potential avenue to follow.
After extensive research, Borgin and Burke’s was certain to be part of his future, at least temporarily. Cas’s work experience along with his pedigree had meant finding an open position was easy enough, and he fully intended to leverage his new role in Knockturn Alley to carve out a place for himself – and therefore every Karkaroff – in this new post-Voldemort world. Sometimes it felt like Cas was the only one of his siblings that intended to look forward, rather than remain stuck in the past. He’d accepted what past relatives of his had done, but was also determined to start a new generation of Karkaroffs that knew how to live in this adapted society, rather than become a relic of the past like many pureblood families who seemed fated to disappear. But he didn’t intend to do it like some purebloods – open blood traitors, who openly scorned pureblood society to ally themselves with the reformists. That unnecessarily burned bridges that might yet prove useful. No, Cas was more calculated than to openly reject his heritage, as much as he despised it, because it might still help him in unforeseen ways. So Borgin and Burke’s was well-suited for his needs – a place for him to advance himself without ever needing to reveal any of his true intentions.
His mentor looked less than impressed with Cas’s intended career change. “That store is…” He trailed off, but Cas could imagine any number of ways that sentence might end. Dark. Corrupted. Malicious. Cas didn’t disagree with any of those possibilities, because Knockturn Alley was indeed a locale for only a certain kind of wizard, one with darker impulses and no moral quandaries. But he knew better than to think he could rise above that sort of legacy. Someone in the family had to invest in those connections to advance themselves, and Cas didn’t trust any of his siblings to properly handle the lifestyle it required. No, in the end Cas could really only trust himself to get the job done, and he knew he would do it well. He’d be surprised if he didn’t someday make a name for himself there, where everybody would know to go to Cas Karkaroff for any consultation on artifacts or Dark magic.
“I can handle it.” After a beat, Cas insisted, “I can!” as his mentor continued to look dubious at the proclamation. It was a phrase Cas had become accustomed to saying to the old man over the years, from his first day as a trainee disabling anti-burglar alarms until his last day, absolutely resolute in his ability to take care of himself and his family. Cas had always felt the need to prove himself to any authority figure, but that never manifested itself vocally. He demonstrated his capability and his abilities through action, not words. Durmstrang, after all, was a tough school where only the strong could prosper, and the strong made it clear who they were through action. But his mentor had always been different, because Cas had never felt that he’d won his approval. If he had, the old man had certainly never expressed that to him through any form of praise. It must be what others felt like when Cas reserved his thoughts for himself.
So to prove that he was indeed capable of tackling this new profession, Cas elaborated, “I’m learning Occlumency. Nobody will be able to take advantage of me.” It was more of an explanation than his teacher deserved, in Cas’s opinion, but it would be certain to make his point. He’d already started the process of understanding how to clear his mind and lock his thoughts inside a mental vault, although he knew he would still have some way to go until he’d truly learned the ability. But it was an important one for anyone intending to work or do business in Knockturn Alley, and it was sure to protect Cas and his secrets from the unsavory folk he’d come across. Cas gripped the armrests of the chair he was sitting in as he wished this meeting would end. His boss couldn’t stop him from leaving, and that at least they both knew. So why the lingering conversation? What did his mentor have left to teach Cas?
His mentor sighed heavily and set the parchment down on his desk. “Someday that won’t be enough, boy.” Cas hated when he called him ‘boy’ – as if he was still a child, recently graduated and with no experience in the real world. It had been 7 years, and Cas had learned too much to still be considered a boy. But it sounded like his mentor was ready to acquiesce, and he didn’t want to risk interrupting that and prolonging the conversation any more than necessary. So he bit the inside of his cheek and stayed silent. After a moment’s pause, his mentor continued, voice rough. “If this is what you want, then I can’t stop you. We both know that. But keep in mind whatever you’re doing this for. If you lose that, then you’ll lose yourself.” And with that he leaned back in his chair and waved Cas out of his office.
What a ridiculous piece of advice, Cas thought as he abruptly rose from his chair and left the office quickly, leaving the door ajar behind him. There was no further goodbye between the two, despite all the time they’d spent together over the years and all the experiences they’d survived. But it was an appropriate goodbye for the pair, since neither had ever been talented at expressing themselves or sharing thoughts or emotions. It was cold, abrupt, and contemplative. Exactly the same as them both. But really, what a worthless thing to end their last conversation on. Cas knew who he was, and what he was fighting for. He had always known that, always been resolute in locating and fixating on his sense of self. He was rigid, he never changed.
And it seemed ridiculous to think that he would ever be in crisis about who he was and what he stood for. Cas stood for absolutely nothing but himself and protecting the family name as a result – because in this society, it was impossible to separate the family from the individual. That level of self-interest, and the natural concern that extended to his family in order to protect himself, would be all Cas ever had. He was sure that there was nothing in life that could challenge that, that could change that. No, Cas was not a tortured soul. Redemption was not his vice, and his game would only ever be one of balance – between himself and his family. Nothing more.
