Even The Best Fall Down Sometimes (Toby)

[Deleted]

Kinsey sat on the edge of the couch, her foot tapping as she stroked Shadow absentmindedly, turning to look every time she heard someone nearby. She was waiting for Toby to be done packing and come talk. They normally hung out the night before going home for break, whether it was Christmas or summer break, so it wasn't completely out of the ordinary for her to be here. The part that was out of the ordinary was that she felt like she needed to have a talk with her best friend. 

She loved Toby like a brother, and she'd learned something the day before that she felt like he should know. The thing was, she saw Toby and Anastasia the other day in the library. Toby was sitting there, writing something down and entirely focused while the girl didn't seem to be helping. As Kinsey walked by, however, she sensed the intentions of the girl who was spending a lot of time with her best friend lately. They weren't particularly bad, but as she glanced over to the couple it was obvious how smitten Toby was ... and she could sense that the girl wasn't half as sincere in return. She wasn't serious about Toby ... but was she ... using him? Kinsey was pretty sure that's what was going on, but there wasn't anything she could do about it then, so she continued on through the library. Her mind raced as she tried to figure out a good time and way to tell her friend. He had to know! Kinsey couldn't just leave him to get hurt like that. It would be cruel of her. 

The problem was, Kinsey wasn't entirely sure how Toby would respond to her news. She knew he liked Anastasia, but she didn't want him to get hurt because of the other girl, especially when she knew she could help it. Toby meant everything to her. He was one of the only people who always stood by her and she wanted to do the same for him now. That was why she'd tell him how she felt, even if it was awkward. 

"Toby!" She greeted when he finally entered the common room. She was the only one there by now, but she didn't care. Kinsey didn't mind waiting for her friend. "You all packed and ready to go then?" Might as well start the conversation out light, she figured. 

tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game on

Toby was ready to go back home to England for the holiday. His parents always made a big deal when he and his sisters came home for holiday. They would basically spend every minute together until they were sick and tired of each other. Toby enjoyed being home with an internet connection and television, but Hogwarts was where he was the most at home. It was where his friends and his entire life basically was. It was weird to think after this holiday, he would be at Hogwarts for only one more year. There was only one more time to do everything before he was out of the castle and in the real world. It was a bittersweet feeling. Toby couldn't wait to get started with his life, but he really enjoyed the security he got when he was at school. Despite all of the bad stuff happening in the world, Hogwarts was always safe. Or so he believed.

Since Toby was officially packed and ready to go in the morning, he figured it was a good time to continue tradition with Kinsey. The night before leaving for the school year, or any holiday, they always spent the night talking about whatever until they fell asleep. It was dorky, but it was something that Toby always looked forward to with his best friend. They didn't really have to mention it anymore, they would just show up everytime.

As Toby made his way down the stairs, he immediately spotted Kinsey on the sofa stroking Shadow on her lap. "'ey mate" he greeted with a smile, plopping himself on the sofa beside Kinsey. "As ready as I'll ever be." he commented with a shrug, not really caring about packing. He had everything he needed back home anyways. Toby pried Shadow out of her lap and plopped the kitten on his chest, nuzzling his face in the cats fur. "You sure you wanna stay here? You're always welcome to stay at my house if you change your mind, Kins." Toby commented to Kinsey with a face full of fur, looking over with a concerned look. She had gone through so much, it kind of worried him to leave her on the holidays.

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Toby joined her in the common room and Kinsey smiled over at him, glad to see him. Really, she was just happy to have Toby in her life, grateful that she had such a good friend that really cared about her and how she was doing. She knew that if she ever needed anything, Toby would be there for her. In turn, that was why she had to tell him what she learned about Anastasia. But ... that could wait a few minutes right? Couldn't she enjoy the first few minutes talking with her best friend. "Oh? Are you hinting that somewher deep in there you're not ready? Or is it just that you don't want to leave me?" Kinsey teased, smirking at Toby as she spoke.

He took Shadow and Kinsey let him without a fight. Tonight was the last chance he'd get to see the kitten for the next few weeks. She might as well let him really enjoy his time with Shadow. Kinsey nodded slowly. "Yeah, I don't want to go home. I'm just not ready to deal with Cara, and going there with Diana and Dustin gone ... it feels like my fault," she answered in a normal tone, despite the undertone of sadness. They'd talked about this enough that it wouldn't be a surprise to Toby and it definitely wouldn't seem like she was looking for sympathy or anything. At his offer she smiled, trying to reassure him. She knew Toby was worried for her. "Thanks Toby. I'll let you know if I change my mind. We're still going to write, right?" she asked curiously. Kinsey assumed that they would, but it never hurt to make sure. 

tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game on

Toby chuckled and shrugged when she made the joke about being unprepared with his packing situation or being afraid of missing her. "Yeah, that's probably it." he agreed, happy to keep the conversation light and easy going. Toby would miss Kinsey, he always missed his best friend when they were apart for too long. This year he felt especially protective over her because of all that she had gone through.

"Of course, Kinsey, I will write you as much as you want." Toby told her with a smile, as if the decision was already final. "And if you change your mind and want to come and stay, the offer extends all through holiday break, it doesn't matter if it's the first or last day." he assured his best friend, not wanting to be pushy but he wanted her to know that he was there for her and she wasn't alone during the holidays. Toby wasn't sure if he knew too many people that were staying at the school. This was usually when everyone left to be with their loved ones. He didn't want her to be alone.

His eyes softened when Kinsey said that she felt like everything was her fault. "You shouldn't blame yourself." Toby told her quickly, not annoyed in the slightest, but he felt like a squeaky wheel at times. There was so much drama when it came to her family it wasn't fair for her to blame it all on herself. His family was bland and boring compared to hers. Toby rested his head on her shoulder, "Everything will be alright, Kinsey, you just gotta be patient. They will probably come around eventually..." he sighed, not really sure that he believed that himself, but he didn't want to lose hope for his best friend. Shadow gnawed on his finger, while Toby playfully booped him a repeatedly.

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[Deleted]

Kinsey tilted her head to the side, teasing her friend, "Which one? Are you not ready to leave or are you going to miss me?" Yes, she knew he was saying he'd miss her before, but she couldn't resist the opportunity to tease, especially since she wouldn't be seeing him for a few weeks now. It was going to be strange, it always was when she didn't see Toby, but this year she'd be staying in Hogwarts without him. It was weird. 

He agreed to write her often and Kinsey grinned at him. "Good! You just have to make sure they're somewhat timely responses, Toby. Don't leave me hanging for days." She was sure she'd find plenty to do at the castle, but she still wanted to hear from her friend. "Especially after your blind date. You have to let me know how that goes, okay?" She nodded when he told her to let him know if she changed her mind about not wanting to come over, but didn't say anything. His offer was so sweet and Kinsey knew that his parents would be kind and accepting, but she was fairly certain she wouldn't be changing her mind. Especially since she was fairly certain Riley would be staying too. Maybe it was terrible of her, but she was hoping to be able to spend some time with him this break.

Toby said that it wasn't her fault and Kinsey lowered her eyes. "I know, but I can't help it." She shivered, leaning closer to Toby. His head was on her shoulder as he told her that everything would be okay and that her siblings would come around. Kinsey shook her head softly, "I don't think they will, Toby. You should have seen the look on Dustin's face that day ..." It still haunted her. She missed her brother, but there was nothing she could do about it. She was dead to him. She sighed, "Sorry I'm bringing down the mood on our last night," Kinsey hesitated before continuing, "but there's something else I wanted to talk to you about ..." She was nervous. She didn't want Toby to get angry at her for interfering, but he had to know that Anastasia was using him. 

tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game on

"I am finished packing and I will miss you." he rephrased himself again, this time with a sweet smile. Toby knew that she was teasing him, she was always teasing him about everything, but it was all in good nature. His brown eyes softened a bit when she asked for letter in a timely manner and he nodded obediently. "I promise to write within a timely manner. Although you know people are doing that texting thing now, I don't know why we gotta keep it all old school all the time. But if handwritten is your jam, Kinsey, I got you." Toby stated with a laugh. Owls and quills would be out of the picture eventually, right? Maybe not. The blind date thing was still making him super nervous. "I can't believe you got me to sign up for it and you didn't even put yourself in it.." Toby wrinkled his nose slightly. Talking about it made his heart pound way too fast. "It's going to be so weird I don't want to go..." Toby whined, burying his head into the sofa.

As Kinsey spoke about her family, it was the same conversation they had a million times, so he didn't have much to comment on that. However, her next comment made him feel a little nervous. Toby froze slightly when she said that she was planning on bringing the mood down a bit tonight. Whatever that meant... it really didn't sound good. Toby hated confrontation of all types, especially when it felt like it was about him. He was easily embarrassed and didn't like to feel like he was wrong. "Uh, what did you want to talk about?" he asked her with a suspect look, his eyes narrowed slightly, stomach sinking.

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[Deleted]

Kinsey's smile grew when Toby reassured her that he was finished packing, but that he was also going to miss her. That was a good thing to know, not that she didn't already know it. She'd been teasing, which he definitely knew. She scoffed when he mentioned texting and how that would be much faster. "Like I have enough money to get a phone, Toby," she answered with a roll of her eyes. Her parents had so many children, they wouldn't be able to get her one either. Kinsey would have to wait until she was out of school and then maybe she could afford something like that. "Pretty sure handwritten letters are all I can do right now," she confirmed, shaking her head at him as she did so. Kinsey chuckled when he brought up the blind date, whining about not wanting to do it and not believing she convinced him to when she wouldn't. Kinsey shrugged, "I've got plenty of romance issues without complicating things." Toby would know what she was talking about. She was still in love with Riley Fudge. Even though Joe Fontaine was quickly growing to be a very close friend, Kinsey was unsure whether he'd be able to become more than that. With the way she cared for Riley, it was highly unlikely. "You are going to tell me all about it, right?" she insisted.

Toby tensed next to her when she mentioned having something to talk about. She knew that she was probably making a bigger deal out of this than was necessary, but to her it was a big deal! She wanted Toby to know the truth about Anastasia. The uncertainty came from not knowing how he would react. "Ummm ... Anastasia," she answered slowly, not able to meet his eyes. "I ... was walking through the library the other day and saw the two of you together. You were working and she was ... well, I- I sensed something from her, Toby." Kinsey quickly turned to face him, meeting his eyes to try and help him understand what she was about to say. "She's just using you Toby, to do her work for her." Kinsey was being blunt, but wasn't that the best way to help him?

tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game on

"Handwritten letters it is." The Ravenclaw declared with a solid nod. The date thing had him feeling all weird now, he couldn't believe he was actually going to go through with it. She mentioned her own reasoning and he shrugged, "Yeah, I will tell you all about it as long as I don't embarrass myself too much..." he told her with a nervous laugh. Toby probably would embarrass himself somehow, he was good at doing that.

Kinsey finally revealed what she was concerned about and Toby's jaw uncontrollably tensed as he took a breath in through his nostrils. Of course it was Anastasia that was the problem... again. That was a common issue his best friend liked to bring up lately. Each time Toby grew more annoyed by it, although she hadn't mentioned it in a few days, admittedly. It was information that he didn't want to hear. Ever. It really upset him. Toby had been hopelessly obsessing over Anastasia for years, the fact that she was giving him the time of day, or going through the motions of opening a book in the library with him, was a dream come true for him. He was too blinded by her beauty to see what was happening, unfortunately. Even then, he probably wouldn't have cared. Somehow, he stupidly felt like he had a chance with Anastasia.

Toby scooted away from Kinsey and he went quiet, his body language already saying it all. "Why do you hate Anastasia so much?" he asked her, trying to control his tone, although it was lacking any happiness from moments before. He was actually mad. "What did she ever do to you to make you always talk so badly about her all the time?" Toby asked defensively, his lips tugging downwards into a frown as his brown eyes narrowed at her, unable to hide the annoyance from his face.

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[Deleted]

Kinsey rolled her eyes at her friend. Toby was cute and adorable. She was sure that anyone who met him on a blind date would be just as enchanted as she often was with her best friend. Toby deserved it. He was kind and caring and honestly tried to help the people around him. He'd always been there for Kinsey, ever since they met in her second year and his first. "You'll do fine, Toby. I'm sure you won't embarrass yourself too badly at all." And even if he did embarrass himself, it would probably be in an endearing way. 

Toby was tense and Kinsey didn't even need to look at him in order to know what he was thinking. He didn't believe her. Again! Why was he so determined to think that she would lie to him?! Throughout the years, the two of them always watched one another's backs. It didn't mean he'd ever been able to stop Dom or that she could keep people from being mean to him, but they were always there for one another. Kinsey didn't understand why, after so many years of close friendship, he wouldn't believe her. It just didn't make sense.

She sighed, entirely exasperated when he moved away from her, asking why she hated Anastasia. "I don't hate her!" Kinsey argued vehemently. "I just ... I don't like her using you. Toby, you are my best friend and she's making you do all her schoolwork. She's a bad influence on you and I don't understand why you don't believe me. You always have before!" Her disappointment at her friend's stubbornness was starting to really make Kinsey irritated though. "When have I ever lied to you? Ever!" She demanded. "And you think I'd start now? Come on Toby, you've got to believe me, she's not who you think she is. She doesn't mean any of it." Kinsey reached over to him, mentally begging him to listen, so he wouldn't get hurt later. She was trying to protect him. 

tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game on

Toby was a bit caught off guard by Kinsey's warning. The look on his face displayed that he didn't like how she had worded it. A part of him was too stubborn to heed her advice, since it wasn't what he wanted to hear about that matter. Toby had never downright blown off her advice before because Kinsey usually was right and wanted the best for him. There had never been a time that Kinsey lied to him, they always had each others backs. Today, he didn't want to talk about it. Kinsey had struck a nerve.

Normally, Toby was a great listener, and very open to hearing different sides to a story, but at the moment he wasn't feeling very patient. He tried droning Kinsey out, shaking his head at her with a apathetic shrug. He pulled away, crossing his arms across his chest when tried to reach for him, slowly shutting down. "I'm not doing the work for her." he lied, growing more defensive. Well, he kind of was doing the work for her...which made him feel more defensive. Kinsey said that it was all fake and his stomach sank, he hoped that she didn't notice his face turn red.

Toby bit down on his lip, the look on his face growing more agitated, "It's not that I don't believe you, I feel like you're being overdramatic. You've never liked her so you have negative predetermined feelings about her." Toby accused, not holding back now, he opened his mouth and the rest spilled out like word vomit. "Can't you just be happy for me that the girl I have been obsessed with since like second year finally knows that I exist?"  

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[Deleted]

Kinsey honestly couldn't believe what was happening. Toby was her best friend. She trusted him more than almost anyone else in the world, but something was breaking with the two of them. She could feel it in the way he looked at her, the disappointment in his eyes and the defensiveness of his words. He lied straight out to her, telling her that he wasn't doing Anastasia's work. Even if she couldn't tell his intentions- like Toby knew she could- she would have known that was a lie, but the fact that he would look straight at her and lie ... it killed her inside. "Fine. You go ahead and say that to anyone who will believe you," she answered softly and pointedly. Toby had to know that she didn't, that she could tell he'd lied. He knew all about her ability, after all. 

Then he went on to say that he didn't not believe Kinsey, he just thought she was being dramatic. She shook her head, not believing this, but losing her patience with this conversation, with her best friend.. "You either believe me or you don't Toby. This has nothing to do with being dramatic. I couldn't care less about Anastasia. I don't hate her, I don't like her. What I care about is you." She bit her lip, making a decision. "If you won't listen to me, then fine. I can't make you, but don't expect me to stand around and watch her use you and break your heart. I won't do it. So you go ahead and be happy with all the attention she gives you. I hope it works out," she told him, her heart breaking. She wouldn't give him an ultimatum, make him choose between her and Anastasia. Dustin did that to her over the summer and she wouldn't do that to anyone else. She'd just ... bow out until she could handle things better. She stood up from the couch, not able to handle this. She was losing Toby, giving him up for his own benefit. If he was as angry as she thought he was, he wouldn't care. "I ... I hope you're right about her. I really do. I'll- I'll see you later," she said, her voice breaking. Kinsey bit her lip to keep it from quivering before she turned and started walking quickly back to the dorm. The second she was in her own room, Kinsey rushed to her bed and covered her head with a pillow, forcing herself to quietly cry into it in an attempt to let everyone else continue to sleep while the rest of her world tumbled down around her. 

(Kinsey out *sob*)
tobias charles watkins

[tobias charles watkins]

@kinsey

Note: game off

This confrontation was becoming way too much for him. He didn't want their last night before holiday be a messy one, but it seemed that was the direction it was turning. It crushed Tobys soul. He listened to her words, the emotion behind her words stinging. Toby could hear how upset she was getting and he was starting to shut down. He didn't have any words.

Toby's chest went tight when she got up from the sofa, stating that she hoped that he was right. He couldn't believe this. They were actually fighting. It caught him off guard because he couldn't remember the last time they had fought about anything - other than Anastasia. He was stupid to believe that Kinsey would be okay with him not taking her side, when she was trying to only be protective over him. They always had a very close and protective relationship. Something in his gut told him right there that he had really messed up. 

He desperately wanted to tell her not to leave, but he was feeling so stubborn and stupid. He hated feeling like he was wrong in a situation. Not only was he wrong not to full heartedly take his best friends advice, he was choosing a girls side that he knew didn't really care about him, he just liked the attention he was finally getting. He liked her so much it hurt. He wished that he could shake it off and just forget about Anastasia sometimes.

So, he allowed her to walk away without a sound, staring straight ahead until she finally disappeared. Toby sighed and waited about five minutes until he slipped back into his dorm and remorsefully stared at the ceiling all night, dissecting the situation...

-- END --

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