we like sportz | tilly

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October 14, 2028
mathilde manon poole

Ozzy looked around impatiently; there wasn’t much he could do with his leg propped up on a couple of pillows. It felt fine, but he’d also been given a handful of potions to deal with the pain. At least he’d gone this long without an injury, unlike the year before. This time was different, however. Usually, a mid-air collision wasn’t too bad, but when a goalpost was involved…well, here he was now. In the bed next to him sat Tilly with her own set of injuries. Figures, it was always a chaser that managed to collide with a keeper.

”You know you’re supposed to throw the quaffle, right? Not go with it through the goal post?” Ozzy looked momentarily displeased before shaking his head. He wasn’t the type to stay angry very long at much. While he was naturally competitive, he also looked for the fun in things. Quidditch was a ton of fun, even more so when he won. ”Do you know who won?” Ozzy had woken up here, so he hadn’t been told who had won. But the reserve Keeper wasn’t nearly as good as Ozzy, so he didn’t get his hopes up. Again, he looked around, muttering to himself. ”Damn…she’s not here today, is she?” The question was more for himself as he prayed the Head Nurse was here—looking at her always made him feel better.

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Faster than a speeding bullet, Quaffle in hand, Tilly Poole had scored. Of course, it came with a caveat: by scoring, she had actually plowed straight through the goalpost and the Keeper, Ozzy Weekly, too. He was in her way and in order to effectively score, it was the only way to do it. Tilly had scored this way before, typically making the collision and simply bouncing off one another, or getting the opposing Keeper to doge out of the way. Surprisingly, quite a few of them did not like having Chasers bombing straight at them from across the pitch. Anyways, she rammed into him, they both took a tumble, he passed out like a Victorian girl dying of the plague (and supposedly had a broken leg). According to witnesses, there had been a collision with the goalpost on Ozzy's end, though Tilly escaped from it scot-free. Her fall had been softened by holding onto him for dear life, resulting in only a broken left wrist and some gnarly bruises to her chest where she'd been cradling the Quaffle the entire time. She couldn't wait to see their color changes.

"I did throw it," Tilly responded, remembering that for once, she wasn't alone in the Hospital Wing. "I threw it, with my whole body, through the goalpost." In Ozzy's defense, he'd made a great block. Her forward momentum and lest second deviation made it so they went through together. Stopping herself from poking the healing wrist, Ozzy continued, asking who won the match. "No clue. They might still be playing since no one has come up yet to check on us." Even the nurse had gone back down just in case. Matches tended to get violent after mid-air collisions like theirs. She wouldn't doubt it if more of their teammates were levitated up sooner or later.

"What? You mean the old crone that looks like a wrinkly testicle? I didn't know you were into great-grandmothers." That had to make Ozzy a what? A grave robber? Tilly knew he probably meant the younger one, but it was funnier this way. Especially since he was stuck in place in his bed.

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[ezio luca bruno osvaldo weekly]

We like sports
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October 14, 2028
mathilde manon poole

As a Keeper, Ozzy traveled the least around the pitch during a match, yet his injuries were usually the worst. Chasers were prone to injury as well, but they had more area to move within. Ozzy would do what he needed to do to prevent a goal. In this case, he had failed because, at some point, it was impossible to block a human quaffle. It reminded him of when his mother had taken him to some muggle ice hockey matches back in California. She’d been preparing for some role, and hockey was somehow involved. For the life of him, he couldn’t remember the name of the movie, but he was also still recovering.

”Eww—no!” Ozzy’s face contorted into one of pure disgust. ”You know—the hot one.” He shook his head. Surely, that had to be obvious. Why in Merlin’s good name would anyone in their right mind look at the other nurse when the Head Nurse was far nicer to look at? But that reminded him. ”What do you know about testicles, anyway?” Ozzy crossed his arms, raising his eyebrows in curiosity. It wasn’t often he heard a girl bring up that particular part of the anatomy very often, but it was more common with his mates who were guys.

”She’s probably giggling with Professor Vector somewhere. I overheard Smith in the library say something about it. I thought he had something going on with Professor McGonagall, though.” The lack of staff and general emptiness of the hospital wing lead Ozzy to agree with Tilly. The match was likely still going on, and since they couldn’t discuss that yet, what else was there but idle student gossip?

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The hot nurse? There was one of those here? Tilly felt like she always got stuck with the same old witch every single time. Who by now just did her job in silence. Every injury or malady Tilly came to the Hospital Wing for was almost guaranteed caused by her own hand. She almost wished it was because she was clumsy or had the perpetual bad luck of being pinched by a mackled malaclaw. Then it would all make sense. But nope! She was simply careless and not afraid to get a little messy, especially with Quidditch and practical lessons.

Ozzy questioned her testicular knowledge and she stared at him for a moment. ”I know that yours were hanging out of your shorts for a moment while the not-hot nurse was fixing up your leg,” she lied, smirking. She hadn’t even paid attention to that whole ordeal. It hurt to turn her neck. Apparently, this was what whiplash felt like. If it was bad now, she could only imagine what it would be like once the medicine wore off. ”Am I wrong though? She does look like one. Especially when that bit of skin under her neck jiggles while she’s talking.” Or maybe a bit like a turkey. That was a better description, really, but Tilly was stuck on ball talk now.

It was at this point that Tilly finally understood who it was that Ozzy was calling the hot nurse. She had actually seen Professor Vector frequently talking to a woman. Which professors were fucking each other really didn’t matter to her all that much. It seemed to be a hot topic amongst her classmates though. Especially in their year, since most of the rumors floating about tended to be about Vector. She had to imagine Sammy and Scottie were constantly being bombarded with questions about it.

”Is McGonagall the short one with the oversized glasses?” she asked him, unsure on who Ozzy was referencing. ”Personally, I like all of the ones in the Cursebreaker department. They have that flair for danger. I bet they’ve seen people die.” She planned to ask some of them one day. And about mummies and other undead creatures they’d stumbled upon. All of it was just so interesting to her.

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[ezio luca bruno osvaldo weekly]

We like sports
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October 14, 2028
mathilde manon poole

Ozzy’s eyes widened as he looked at Tilly and then instinctively to his lower regions. But after processing it for a moment—he realized it couldn’t have been true. He was wearing his quidditch gear still, which did not include shorts. ”N-No, they weren’t.” But now Tilly had forever inscribed the mental image of the other Nurse as a testicle with limbs. Oh, Merlin, talk about the stuff nightmares are made of. ”I didn’t realize you were so curious about my balls, Poole. I could’ve invited you to the Gryffindor Common Room a long time ago.” Ozzy had never been one to easily fluster, or at least not remain fazed for very long.

A light smirk crept onto his face as he sat up a little straighter, half looking to the side at his comrade in pain. The mental image of the nurse still ruined the moment. ”I wonder how many centuries she’s been around.” Ozzy involuntarily shivered. These were not thoughts for the faint of heart. All the nurses should look like the head nurse if you ask his opinion. Unfortunately, nobody was. ”That’s the one.” He replied. At first, Ozzy thought she might’ve been one of the older trainees but then learned she was a Professor.

”I mean—she’s always there.” Ozzy pointed out. His normally animated nature was limited at the moment, which was proving mentally frustrating for the energetic teen. While everyone probably had the same thought about the Cursebreakers, the way Tilly spoke the statement with that curious wonder in her eyes is what made it odd rather than the words themselves. ”My sister told me Professor Vector used to be a Cursebreaker. You could ask him.” Ozzy offered up. He couldn’t help but try to be helpful in his own strange way.

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”How would you know? You were out cold. Did you know you snore too?” Stacking white lies was one of her favorite things to do. Perfectly inoffensive and put just enough edge that it made people wonder if she was telling the truth or not with everything she said. Tilly knew it was a double-edged sword to act this way, but a little lie here or there never hurt anyone. ”No thank you. I saw enough,” she added, smiling, but also wrinkling her nose at him. ”Guess you’re lucky the other nurse wasn’t here to see. You might still have a chance now.”

Tilly knew magic-kind lived longer, though she had very little reference to that. Everyone seemed to go on and on about how living a hundred and a half years was relatively common, sometimes longer. That still blew her little muggleborn mind. At least her siblings all had it too. Being so much younger than them had always made her feel like she was missing out. If each of the Pooles ended up living to be at least one hundred, then she figured that would go away.

It was good to know that she knew who some of the LIFE professors were. This time next year they were going to be the ones busy ruining her life and keeping her doing schoolwork instead of Quidditch. Tilly had already decided to take as light a load as possible, giving her the time she needed for all of her practices. She very clearly had a path in front of her, and not taking it would be stupid. ”Now that’s an idea! He’s always seemed super cool about random questions. Do you know any of the other ones?”

Tilly was certain that not all of the adults that entered the cursebreaker wing of the school were actual professors or students. They seemed to be bringing work, artifacts, and whatever else was needed for teaching. Which sort of made sense to her. If they were all still active, they were going to be doing work outside of teaching. ”I could lead with knowing his siblings. Lull him into thinking I have a question about one of them.” Or how to scrounge up baked goods from the bakery his family ran. It had taken Tilly an uncomfortably long time to realize that they were all related.

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[ezio luca bruno osvaldo weekly]

We like sports
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October 14, 2028
mathilde manon poole

Tilly was impossible and a little odd. Not that it discouraged Ozzy in any way. Plus, her taunting that perhaps the old, wrinkly nurse had, in fact, seen his equipment. "On second thought, I've seen how you handle a Quaffle. I don't think I want you around the goods." There wasn't much about Tilly Poole that made one assume she handled anything with care, especially when she liked to pummel into people directly, using her entire body to score a goal simply.

"Other professors?" Ozzy thought about the ones he might have interacted with here and there by chance or via detention. He furrowed his brows as if in deep thought. "Professor Burke, the blonde one, is kind of mean, but she's hot." Ozzy thought out loud. In an unfortunate series of events, Ozzy and Theo had ended up in detention with her rather than their usual MAGIC professors. "I don't know her name, but there's one Auror who teaches dueling, I think. I overheard something about it." Ozzy hadn't gotten all the details, but Aurors would probably have some cool stories, right?

Tilly still seemed to be processing the idea of approaching Professor Vector. An older brother of their classmates. But her idea was sound. "Just make up a story of Sammy doing something dumb." He was bound to listen as a Professor and brother, Ozzy figured.

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Tilly grinned at Ozzy and aggressively moved one of her hands in a squeezing motion. It was true, she did have a vice-like grip on the Quaffle whilst playing. One had to in order to keep their offhand on their broom. She disliked freestyling with both hands while going for catches because it required way more balance than she felt she had sometimes. With how many bludger hits she’d taken in practice lately; she couldn’t trust her Beaters any longer. Pretty soon here she was going to have a talk with the Captain about maybe finally subbing in Lyka until the other two figured out what the heck they were doing.

She really didn’t understand the boys in her year, as they said almost all of the young professors were hot. First it was the nurse, then it was McGonagall, and now it was Burke, whoever that was again. But Ozzy offered up one of the Auror professors that taught the trainees dueling, and that definitely sounded like a lead. ”Aurors have definitely killed people, right?” she asked. There were still parts about the magical government that she didn’t quite understand. It seemed backwards a lot of the time. And inefficient. Which was why if she was going to stick with it, she was going to be playing Quidditch instead of doing anything else. That seemed like a marginally saner route to take in life.

”Well that won’t take too much thinking then.” Which one was Sammy again? The Vectors were so confusing. At least Idele could be differentiated from them. Maybe asking her would be even better than trying to make something up about the boys.

”So how’s it feeling?” Tilly asked, changing the topic back to their injuries. She had pointed at his leg with the arm that was in the sling. Her wrist stung slightly as it shifted slightly. It was far better than it had been before she got to the Hospital Wing. ”Suppose you’ll be stuck here all night then? I think the nurse said I’d be out by dinner.”

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[Theodore Marcus Flint]

a fine young galahad.

IT MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO SOME, BUT Theodore Marcus Flint was fantastic at faking a good old fashioned 'fainting spell'. He'd watched the Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff game from the Slytherin stands. Wearing something appropriately gauche, with a banner on it depicting a very gruesome fight between a lion and a badger, that ended with the rearing of a great basilisk that unhinged its jaw and ate the entire piece of artwork all in a oner, before winking one red eye and dissolving into a splatter of ink.

This continued on a loop until a Professor came and confiscated it around the second half, citing a few unfortunate puking incidents from other bystanders as a result of the 'gruesome and unnecessary display of violence'. Theo had defended himself by reminding his Professor that it was, in fact, just a drawing. This was met with enough ire that he'd been told to remove himself from the game and 'think about the consequences of his actions'. It meant that by the time Theo heard about Ozzy and Tilly's great midair tango, he was already in the Great Hall, munching on a slice of quiche for his lunch. It was just rude, to be frank.

Theo had swallowed his last mouthful of quiche, pressed a hand to his gut, and feigned a great big groan for immediate effect. "Oh, I don't feel- I don't feel so good." He'd told Gilly, who'd come straight to him to tell him what had happened at the game. Something Theo had demanded of the first year after the last incident he'd missed. Gilly had scampered away so quickly, Theo reckoned he'd assumed he was about to be ribbed for the last time Gilly had upchucked in the very same hall.

Instead, Theo crawled out of his seat and stumbled in a zig-zag up the main isle of seats. His head of house sat primly at the professors table, and Theo blinked at them owlishly. "I'm afraid I-" He gulped dramatically, a hand clutching at his throat. "Why, I think I'm about to-" And then he'd let his head sag against his back and relaxed every muscle in his legs so that he sort of crumpled onto the ground in a heap.

Theo lay there holding his breath for at least 30 seconds before anything happened. Probably because he was sort of known for his theatrics, but when Theo made himself hyperventilate a gaggle of students gasped and cried out in shock and there were a myriad of mysterious hands prodding and pawing at him all at once. "Mr. Flint!" A concerned voice cried into his ear. "Mr. Flint, can you hear me, young man!" Theo screwed up his face, focusing on the terrible onion breath and letting his mouth fill with saliva at the sheer stench. He groaned in pain, curling into his stomach and letting his shoulders heave with fake, wordless sobs.

"To the Infirmary with you then!" Was the final declaration, and Theo felt his body lighten as he was charmed into a very pleasant float that left his stomach swooping like he'd done a dive on a broom. He let himself go limp, garbling nonsense and rolling his eyes back into his head until drool bubbled out of the corner of his mouth.

Theo made a great show of it all the way to the Infirmary doors, which swung up in a frenzy as he was rushed onto a gurney. "What is the matter boy?!" The fat, old nurse squealed into Theo's ear and he thrashed about a bit for final effect before curling into a ball and shutting his eyes, forcing his breaths even. "Perhaps... something he ate..?" His escort preposed, though with a heavy hint of doubt in their tone that almost made Theo want to laugh. "A Belly-Settler than, I suppose." He heard the nurse declare, "And some space, please."

A clatter of even footsteps sounded, fading into the distance before a door closed and silence prevailed once again. Theo rolled onto his back and stretched out his legs, letting his arms hang loose over either side of his gurney. After a handful of seconds, he propelled himself into a sitting position and leapt up to stand on the thin mattress underneath him so that he could peer over the privacy screens that shielded his bed from the others. "Aye, aye, Captains!" Theo declared, wide stance and grinning maniacally as he spotted his two friends just a few beds away. "Thought you could go and make a fool of yourselves without me?!"

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[ezio luca bruno osvaldo weekly]

We like sports
and we don't care who knows

October 14, 2028
mathilde manon poole
Theodore Marcus Flint

Ozzy made a face at Tilly’s gesture. Maybe that worked for some guys, he thought. Merlin knew he’d eavesdropped on enough stories when his parents had their friends over at the house when he was younger. There had been much he didn’t understand, and in the end, Monday always dragged him back to his room by the back of his pajama shirt. Then he shook his head. Tilly was a bit of an odd one but a formidable Quidditch opponent, not to mention very pretty. ”Probably? Like, bad guys?” Ozzy hadn’t really thought about it. On no-maj televisions, the good guys always go the bad guys one way or another. It was probably the same. But Aurors back home were probably more aggressive than Aurors here, or so he heard.

Now that he thought about it, Ozzy couldn’t remember ever seeing Sammy or Scottie talking to Professor Vector. Idele he had seen once, but he was also Head of Ravenclaw. He shrugged it off. It was probably just a strange family dynamic. As a member of a non-typical family, Ozzy didn’t overthink it. ”What?” Ozzy blinked a few times at Tilly before looking where she pointed—his leg. ”Oh, it's fine. Doesn’t really hurt, so maybe it didn’t totally break.” He shrugged. The medical lingo went over his head for the most part, but the last time he seriously broke a bone, he did have to stay overnight, which was boring, to say the least.

”How's your—“ Ozzy was about to ask about Tilly’s arm when the doors burst open. A Professor walked in with what appeared to be a student floating but curled up into the fetal position. The Nurse quickly ran over. ”Who is that?” Ozzy asked to nobody in particular, but he struggled to push himself up to see better with his leg stopping most of his movements. ”Maybe somebody else crashed?” Ozzy looked at Tilly. Maybe she could see better. But the Nurse directed them around privacy screens so nobody could see. The Professor left, and things fell quiet until a figure popped up from behind the screens like some jack in the box. Ozzy burst out laughing. ”What the heck are you doing here?” Don’t get him wrong, Ozzy was happy to see his friend. ”A painting give you a papercut or something?”

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Tilly could have spent all day talking about their broken bones, hoping to poke and prod them at any given chance. While she absolutely hated being hurt, the pain was so worth it sometimes. She ended up in the Hospital Wing at least once a week now from practice, whether from attempting a new move or getting hit by a wayward bludger. A month and change into school and the nurse was already tired of seeing her. The feeling was mutual. Ozzy said his leg didn’t hurt too bad, hypothesizing that it might not be as bad as it seemed. The nice part about magic was that they were both going to be fixed up quickly. Tomorrow, it would be like it never happened in the first place. The only bad part about it was missing the rest of the match.

Ozzy sounded like he was about to ask how her arm was when there was a sudden disturbance at the front of the room. Floating through the air was an unmistakable shape: Theo. The two of them had been talking more frequently so far this year, and she could easily pick him out anywhere. Her injured companion seemed to not recognize the Slytherin at first, wondering aloud if someone else may have gotten injured during the match. Tilly watched in silence as Theo moaned and groaned, much to the dismay of the confused professor and nurse. As he was settled into a bed of his own, the adults disappeared, most likely to find the necessary medicine.

It didn’t take long for Theo to perk up, immediately sitting upright on his bed and acting as if he was fine. Because he was fine. ”I thought it was a pretty effective tactic,” Tilly interjected. ”I got the point, and took out their Keeper.” Hufflepuff didn’t need Beaters for all of their heavy lifting. Ozzy asked if Theo had gotten a papercut, and she almost added that his pureblood pedigree probably came with a nasty side-effect of inbred hemophilia. She kept that thought to herself though. Sometimes others didn’t understand the banter that she and Flint had with one another. While Ozzy would probably catch on, there was a time and place for it.

”Didn’t you hear Weekly? His little tummy is hurting him,” Tilly mocked her friend from afar. He couldn’t physically fight back against her when she had a broken arm. The nurse wouldn’t like that at all.

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